


A Dimensional Affair

by missmahem



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alpha Kylo Ren, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst with a Happy Ending, BDSM, Ben Solo Needs A Hug, Blowjobs, Bruises, Choking, Claiming Bites, Dirty Talk, Dominant Kylo Ren, Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, F/M, Face Slapping, Face-Fucking, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Force Bond (Star Wars), Force Choking (Star Wars), Force Lightening, Force-Sensitive Reader, Forced Orgasm, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Inappropriate Use of Lightsabers, Inappropriate Use of the Force, Knights of Ren - Freeform, Kylo Ren Angst, Kylo Ren Has Issues, Kylo Ren Needs a Hug, Kylo Ren Redemption, Kylo Ren is Not Nice, Lightsaber Used as a Sex Toy, Plot Twists, Porn, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings, Possessive Kylo Ren, Protective Ben Solo, Protective Kylo Ren, Quantum, Reader is a bad ass, Reader-Insert, Reader-Interactive, Redeemed Ben Solo, Slow Burn, Smut, Submissive Kylo Ren, Submissive Reader, Supreme Leader Kylo Ren, The Force Ships It, Top Kylo Ren, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, Verbal Humiliation, Virgin Kylo Ren
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-28
Updated: 2020-11-24
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:34:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 15
Words: 63,092
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24429562
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/missmahem/pseuds/missmahem
Summary: You are a quantum physicist on Earth working on a very important project. You've devoted your life to your work but you've always felt like there was more to you. It isn't until the dream that you've had for ages personifies itself that you become curious. And then there's that tall, black figure with the deep, sensual voice. That voice haunts your dreams, but where is it coming from?
Relationships: Ben Solo | Kylo Ren/Reader, Ben Solo/Reader, Ben Solo/You, Kylo Ren & You, Kylo Ren/Reader, Kylo Ren/You
Comments: 47
Kudos: 196





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome all! This is my first fic, so please be patient with me on updates and be kind to me in the comments! This is a slow burn, like mega slow. There will be eventual smut and romance. I'm not exactly sure what direction I want to take this, but I have the first four chapters ready to go. I will try to update daily. I have no affiliation with Star Wars. I also make up shit about science and Star Wars. This story is going to be set at the end of TLJ after the Resistance has fled Crait. This is also major canon divergence, so please don't hate me if I barely mention original characters. Also, reader is a fucking badass. Enjoy!

Chapter 1

“Fuckkkkkk…” you groaned as you rolled over to stop your alarm from going off.

Today was going to be a long day and you barely slept all night. You had that dream again. The same one you’ve had for as long as you could remember:

_You were standing in a grassy field as a faint mist from the waterfall kissed your skin that was burning under the hot sun. The scene was beautiful. The grass swayed ever so slightly in the breeze and you felt at peace—then you heard it._

_“Y/N…” the voice said._

_You turned toward where the voice originated from. As always, nothing was there. Returning to the waterfall, the scene changed, and you were engulfed in darkness. The darkness was thick and almost tangible. It smelled of death, decay, and ruin. You wandered farther into the unknown abyss as a hall of mirrors came into view._

_It was a strange sight. Your reflection in the mirror was something that always startled you, but it was always the same. Your hair was done into a low updo with strands of your chestnut locks framing your face. Your makeup was done simply, yet elaborately enough to make your ocean-blue eyes look like they danced in the shifting light. Your olive skin was covered in a black floor length gown. The plunging neckline showed off your sternum tattoo you got back in college and the black lace trailed all the way down your hands. It might have made you seem like a narcissist, but you loved this part of the dream. You knew you were attractive, but you never dressed this sexy. The gown hugged your curvy figure in all the right places—like it was made for you._

_Soon, however, you were snapped out of your obsessive trance as you watched a head full of silken black locks run across the floor in front of you. You turned away from the mirror and the scene flashed back to the waterfall. The child ran forward toward the edge of the cliff of the waterfall. You chased after and called out for him to stop as you always did. You ran faster. Maybe you would catch him this time. Just a little faster…_

_Just as you reached out to grab his arm, he plummeted over the side of the cliff, taking you with him._

The fall off the waterfall in the dream was always the worst part. You would wake up sweating and tears streaming down your face. It always took so long to calm yourself down after, but you didn’t have time for that today.

You rolled out of bed and threw on your robe before heading to the kitchen to start the coffee. You took a quick shower and did your makeup like normal: concealer, brows, mascara, and some lip gloss. You quickly brushed your hair and chose to let it air dry on the way to the lab. Today you opted for a more relaxed outfit given the day you were about to have. You grabbed your lab coat, coffee, phone, and keys and you were out the door.

The drive to the lab wasn’t that far, but it was far enough to make your mind wander. Traffic was horrible and you just knew you were going to be late. On instinct, you took a couple turns not knowing where the hell you were going. Eventually you arrived at the building and had time to grab a bagel from the café downstairs.

_What a lucky bitch,_ you thought to yourself.

After getting your bagel and saying hello to the older security guard like you always did, you hopped on the elevator. That feeling was there again…Like a prick or tingle at the back of your neck. All of a sudden, you didn’t feel so great. You leaned against the railing in the elevator as it made its ascent to the 43rd floor. You closed your eyes and pinched the bridge of your nose to try to alleviate the pressure.

_Get a grip, Y/N,_ you complained to yourself.

_Who are you,_ the voice said and your eyes snapped open. That voice. It was the same voice from the dream, but it felt like it was right behind you.

What. The. Fuck.

Eventually, you reached your destination and the pressure subsided. You stepped out of the elevator to be greeted by none other than Mason with that big, goofy grin on his face that was definitely out of place to be so early in the damn morning.

“Mornin’ beautiful!” Mason chimed.

“Mason, how many times do I have to tell you to not call me that?” you hissed pushing past him.

“Aw, come on Y/N. Take the compliment every once and a while,” he said.

“I’m not very good at compliments unless it’s about my work,” you simply replied while placing your belongings inside your desk. He jogged to catch up with you, his shaggy blonde hair swaying around his face. He reached the door to your office and leaned against the frame, green eyes studying you.

“So, I’ve figured…” he trailed off, rubbing the back of his neck. “Hey, are you going with anybody to the demonstration tomorrow? I mean, I know it’s kinda like a formal event, but I thought maybe we could go together?”

The look on your face gave him all the answers he needed.

“Okay, okay. I just thought that—”

“She’s going with me,” Nora interrupted, handing you your data pad and notebook.

Mason gave you both a look, huffed, and walked off. He was nice but he was so fucking overbearing. He was cute but not your type. Did you have a type? Who knows, you never had time for a relationship or to even think about one.

“Thank you,” you told her.

“No problem! I know he can be a bit…much sometimes. But he’s nice right?” she asked, eyeing him sitting at his own desk.

“I suppose,” you replied while organizing your papers and moving toward the conference room where Dr. Cooper was waiting to get started.

Dr. Cooper was in his mid to late 60s and you had always viewed him as a father figure. He was definitely a better father to you in the last 3 years you had known him than yours had ever been. Shortly after finishing grad school, you took up a residency with Dr. Cooper to continue your research on quantum physics and the possibility of alternate realities and dimensions. Little did you know that the research the two of you were doing independently would be fully funded, which allowed you to be able afford the lab and the two assistants, Nora and Mason.

“Good morning, Coop!” you said as you sat at the table.

“Good morning, Y/N. How are you today?” he asked.

“Pretty good, just ready to get started. I can’t believe we are finally here! All these years leading up to this demonstration is so exciting. I can only imagine what this contribution will do for the scientific community,” you rambled, overly ecstatic.

He chuckled, “It’s always all work with you, isn’t it?”

“As long as you’ve known me, I thought you would’ve figured that out by now, Coop.”

“Very well,” he said, sighing, “I just wish at some point you’d try to live a little. Go on vacation and have fun or something. You’re young! Don’t waste your life up to your ears in work, hun, or you’ll end up like me—old, fat, and the only thing I get to come home to is that damn dog.”

You chuckled, “Okay, okay, maybe I’ll take some time off once we get the approval after the demonstration tomorrow. Alright?”

“I’m holding you to that.”

And with that, you began your workday.

The day went exactly how it always did—lots of talking, preparing, and running diagnostics before actually doing anything physical. You were in your office with the door closed looking over the most recent report when Nora started knocking.

_Wait, how did I know it was Nora?_ you thought to yourself, _probably just a feeling._

“Come in!” you hollered.

“Hey,” she said, sticking her head through the door.

“What’s up?”

“The three of us are going a few blocks over to the deli for lunch, wanna come?” she asked.

You studied all the documents strung across your desk and sighed, “Probably not today. Just bring me something back, will ya? Like a BLT or something.”

“Sure!” she said as you reached for your wallet to give her some cash. “Nope, this one’s on me.”

“But—” you started before she cut you off.

“Stop, you’re always covered in work and you’ve been nothing but good to me during my time here. Just let me do something nice for once? Please?”

“Ugh, fine.” you complained.

“Great! See you in a little while!” she waved as the door shut behind her.

You ran your fingers through your hair and let out a sigh. Being alone was a lot better than keeping any company. You were still so tired from the restless night you had, so you took advantage of the empty lab and laid your head down on your desk, shutting your eyes.

You knew you wouldn’t be able to sleep. Your brain never shut off it seemed. Instead, you decided to silently replay what would be happening the next day at the event and then you felt it again.

The prick at the back of your neck. The tingle.

You jolted away from the desk and anxiously eyed around the room when you saw it in the middle of the lab. Carefully, you edged around your desk and quietly opened the door to see what looked like a blurry figure standing near some filing cabinets. Your eyes grew wide and you blinked a few times to make sure you were seeing clearly.

_What the fuck did I put in my coffee this morning?_ you questioned yourself, not believing what you were seeing.

Unexpectedly, the figure turned to face you. You couldn’t make out any details other than it seemed male, tall, and clad in black. Weird.

“Hello?” you said, sounding way more confident than you felt.

_Who are you?_ the voice said once again in your head. Definitely male. His voice was deep, rich, and something about it ignited a heat between your legs.

_God dammit, get a grip woman,_ you chastised yourself.

_Why is the Force connecting us?_ he asked, sounding awestruck.

“What the fuck is the Force?” you asked audibly, and you swore you saw his figure tense.

_I’ll ask again, who are you?_ he repeated himself, sounding a little harsher than before.

“I should be asking you that question since you’re in my lab, pal. But since you’re so keen on finding out who the hell I am, my name is Dr. Y/L/N and I am a quantum physicist. Now, who the fuck are you?”

_Such language,_ a beat, _but given that we have been brought together by the Force, I would say that you will find out who I am in time. Now, doctor, if you will excuse me…_ he said, turning to leave.

“Hey, wait a minute!” you shouted, moving toward the figure as it dissipated into the air.

You stood in the middle of the lab staring into the direction he just disappeared from, feeling sweat rolling off your forehead. The ding from the elevator startled you and brought you back to reality. You hurried back to your office and closed the door to collect yourself.

_Wait_ , you thought, _how are they back already?_

You looked down at your watch and an hour and a half had passed since you last spoke to Nora. And hour and a half. That small altercation with that black figure with the deep voice took up an hour and a half of your time.

Your hands trembled as you returned to your desk and tried to calm down before they ultimately barged in with your lunch. As if right on que, Mason threw the door open with a to-go bag in hand.

“I come bearing gif—” he abruptly stopped, taking in your shaken presence.

“Y/N, are you okay? You look like you’ve seen a ghost,” he said coming around your desk and squatting to get on your eye level.

You still couldn’t speak. You couldn’t even process what had happened. Throughout all your years of experiments and research, you knew the possibility of beings existing in an alternate dimension is likely. That’s the only logical explanation, right? That somehow, for God knows what reason, you made contact with someone from a different reality? Then the thought struck you—could you make it happen again? The presentation tomorrow came to your mind. The whole point of the presentation was to provide the research and proof of a quantum continuum and the display of teleportation. Granted, the demonstration is about teleporting an object, like a pen or a feather, but what if you could teleport people? What if—

You were shaken from your stupidly long thought process when Mason rubbed your arm as if to comfort you.

“Don’t fucking touch me,” you said, jumping up from your seat and grabbing your belongings and lunch at the same time and bolting from the room.

You ran past Nora and Coop and hopped on the elevator. You weren’t exactly sure what had happened or why that tingle on the back of your neck still hadn’t gone away, but you knew one thing for certain—you had to hear his voice again.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to Chapter 2! Definitely took longer than I thought to update. In this chapter, we explore our reader some more and learn what exactly she's been working on. We also hear some more from our black-clad man with the delicious voice. Enjoy!

_Doctor…_ you heard as you jolted away from your work desk. The pain that shot through your lower back was enough evidence to suggest you had been out for a while, hunched over the desk. After fleeing from the lab, you obsessed over calculations that could possibly rekindle the connection to his dark vision.

 _We have to stop meeting like this,_ he said as you rubbed your eyes and glanced over at the clock. 4:37 a.m. Great.

“Once again, you’re the one that’s in my space. I swearing I’m fucking losing it,” you said, cracking your neck and shifting around to face his figure. It seemed clearer now. Like he was coming into focus more. Now you were able to make out other features such as his dark, flowy hair and a black cape that billowed out from behind him. He was broad and so tall. Even having him blurred before you, you had never seen anyone emit such _power._

 _Do you always have such a filthy mouth?_ he purred, making you absentmindedly press your thighs together. Why are you like this? Your silence made him continue.

 _Apparently so,_ he chuckled, _but I am still curious as to why this is happening and as to why I can’t fully see you._

You suddenly became very self-conscious of your sleep-ridden face and the black sports bra and leggings you had changed into when you got home. Your current lack of a shirt made your face flash the deepest shade of crimson. Oh god, what all could he see?

“What all can you see?” you inquired.

The figure slowly started to pace, shaking his head. _Not much. I can see your shape and that you’re wearing a black outfit. I can see your hair pulled back, away from your face. Other than that, it’s distorted. Can you see my surroundings? I can’t see yours._

“No,” you replied, “I can see about the same for you. I just don’t understand what’s happening or if this is even real. Where are you?”

He paused for a moment as if he was deciding to tell you his location.

 _Currently, the Outer Rim near Crait. And yourself?_ he asked.

Huh?

“Wait, what’s the Outer Rim? What’s a Crait?”

_Ah, so you are farther than I originally suspected. What planet are you on?_

“Earth. I’m on Earth.” you replied.

 _Earth,_ he whispered, pondering your location, _I will see what information I can find on surrounding star systems. Sleep well, Doctor, until we are connected again._

“Wait,” you said as he turned to leave, “what’s your name?”

_Ben, my name is Ben._

+++++++++++++++++

Ben. His name is Ben. You smiled to yourself as you laid in bed, trying to soak up the last few minutes of rest before you had to start your day. The altercation between the two of you earlier that morning had raised so many questions. Obviously, the universe is expansive and never-ending, so of course there had to be life out there somewhere. What you didn’t know, however, was just how far away that life was from you. Considering you couldn’t find shit online about a planet called Crait, you assumed it was pretty damn far. You childishly coined Ben as your Space Prince. Fucking ridiculous.

You eyed the space in your room that he had occupied earlier that morning. You let your mind wander at the thought of him. What was he doing now? Would he be asleep? Working? Does he have a family? Was he thinking about you? You huffed at the thought, semi-annoyed that you’ve already let this mysterious man make you feel some type of way. Regardless, he’s probably going about his day not even giving it the first thought. Why the hell should it matter to you? You barely know this person yet here you are, drowning yourself in your own fantasy soap opera drama. Acting as if this Space Prince is coming to whisk you away to the farthest reaches of the galaxy.

 _So, so fucking stupid,_ you thought to yourself.

You rolled out of bed and went about your typical morning routine, checking your text notifications on your phone as you stirred the creamer into your coffee. Apparently, Nora had nothing better to do than blow your shit up:

Y/N!! Are you okay? What’s going on?

Hellloooooo?

Jesus woman, let someone know you’re not dead at least.

Well fuck, what are you wearing for the presentation? I was going to go for classy, cocktail attire. What do you think?

Would pink make me look like a child? What about my lab coat? Should I wear that? HELP!!

Btw, don’t forget Coop is stopping by around 3-ish!! He said to remind you that he has something to give you.

You sighed, replying back:

Hey, I’m okay. Just didn’t feel too great. And yeah, I’m probably wearing black, as usual. Thanks for reminding me about Coop, I completely forgot. I’ll see you later.

Glancing at the time on your phone, it read just a little past 1 p.m. Damn, you really slept that long. Or did you? You thought back to how time was completely variable in that encounter at the lab. How what had felt like 5 minutes had actually been an hour and a half. Obviously, this morning you had spoken longer than before, so just how much time passed during that conversation?

Finishing your coffee, you decided to go ahead and do your hair and makeup before the gala tonight. You curled your hair and styled it into a low chignon updo at the base of your hairline, adding some wispies to frame your face and then spraying your style with hair spray. As for your makeup, you applied a little heavier than usual, complimenting your blue eyes with a neutral smokey eye and a mauve-nude lip. You had just finished applying mascara when you heard the doorbell chime.

“Coming!” you yelled, throwing on your robe and tying it while jogging down the hallway.

You threw open the door to see Coop standing there, already dressed in a suit with a box in his hands that was wrapped in an elaborate bow.

“Y/N! Good to see you! May I come in?” he asked.

“Of course!” you said, opening the door wider and stepping out of the way.

He crossed the threshold of the door and made his way into the living area. This wasn’t the first time Coop had come to your home. The last time was about 7 months ago after you had learned about the death of your father. Even though he wasn’t the best parental figure and definitely loved the drink more than you at some points, you still grieved heavily over the loss. Coop had stayed with you during the time after the funeral, making sure you were eating and taking care of yourself. It was such a solemn time during your life that neither of you have discussed it much since then. It really was for the best. Every time a discussion about your past or your parents—especially your father—came up, it was like ripping the scab off a healing wound just to start the process all over again.

You positioned yourself on the chaise opposite of Coop. He sat the box on the sofa next to him and looked back to you, concern filling every wrinkle and crease in his aging face.

“What happened yesterday?” he questioned.

You shifted uncomfortably in your seat, “I just didn’t feel too great, so I just thought it best to come home.”

“Y/N…” he sighed, “don’t bullshit me. I’ve known you too long for that. What’s going on? Mason said you looked absolutely mortified and completely recoiled when he tried to comfort you.”

Fucking Mason. Of course.

You puffed your cheeks and let out an exasperated huff, “Well, to be completely honest, I’m not okay. Something weird has been happening and I’m not exactly sure what it is.”

He squinted his eyes at you, genuine concern playing across his features.

“Go on,” he said simply.

“Uh, okay,” you paused, “have you ever considered the possibility of an alternate reality outside of our own? I mean, duh, of course you have. It’s literally our work. Anyway, have you ever thought about if we could contact them?”

“That’s what got you tore up? A few theories about the quantum realm?”

You pressed your lips into a thin line, unsure of what to say next. You couldn’t possibly tell him about Ben or your encounters. He would think you were insane and just hearing voices, which would definitely warrant you a trip to the local hospital. You definitely didn’t need that. At this point, you were more than convinced that Ben was real and somehow, the two of you managed to connect across dimensions. You just didn’t know how or why. You found it best to partially lie to Coop even though it pained you to not be open with him.

“Well, kind of? Basically, I wanted to stay back from lunch to work on some calculations I had been doing independently and run a couple tests. Ya know, just to see what would happen. When I fired up the generator, I think it shocked me a little. Didn’t leave a mark, but still frazzled me. I felt weird after, so I just came home.”

Coop’s posture relaxed just a bit, but he was still tense as he spoke, “Y/N! You should have told us! Electric shock like that could seriously hurt you.”

You felt like a weight had been taken off your shoulders because he bought your story.

“I’m sorry,” you apologized, “I just didn’t want to worry anybody.”

Coop sighed, “Ah, well, no matter. If you are feeling okay, you should be fine. Now, I have something for you.”

He reached beside him and picked up the gift. It was in a black box with a gold ribbon. Coop knew you so well. He positioned the box on the end of the chaise and gestured for you to open it. You scooted up to it and began undoing the bow. It was beautifully wrapped, you almost didn’t want to open it. You removed the ribbon from the box and lifted the lid. You felt tears prick your eyes once you saw what was inside. The box contained a neatly pressed and folded white lab coat, a striking contrast to the dark background of the wrapping. On the left above the pocket was your full title, “Dr. Y/F/N Y/L/N,” embroidered in shiny black thread. On the right was a solid black lapel pin with the words “Doctor of Research” etched into it with gold. It was perfect. Your first lab coat, which you still wear, had cost a pretty penny and you saved so hard to get it. It was your pride and joy. This gift was something you were not expecting.

“Coop…” you started, “thank you SO much. I cannot believe you had this made. It’s beautiful. I love it so much.”

You set the box in the floor and crossed the room and sat on the couch to give Coop a hug.

He chuckled, “Y/N, you’re the closest thing to a daughter I’ve ever had. I’m so proud of all you’ve accomplished, and I felt it was fitting for the occasion. I was hoping you’d wear it to the ceremony tonight. It might be more flattering than your other coat that is littered with distasteful pins and chemical stains,” he teased.

“Ha, ha. Very funny. But yes, I’m definitely wearing it tonight!” you beamed.

“Excellent!” he said, smiling back and checking his watch. “Well, I should get going so you can finish getting dressed. I’ll see you in a little while.”

He got to his feet and headed out the door. You were absolutely elated over his gift. You rarely bought yourself anything and having someone gift you anything was even rarer. You checked the time as well. 3:28. Damn, you really had to get dressed. Especially if you wanted to make it on time with traffic.

_What to wear, what to wear,_ you thought to yourself as you skimmed your endless amount of black clothing. You’d never been one to wear much color. The most colorful things in your closet were either sage or olive green. You had the occasional grays and whites thrown in there as well. Your hand settled on a black cocktail dress at the back of your closet that you had worn for graduation photos a few years back. You prayed to whatever god was out there that it still fit. You were not in the mood for dress slacks.

It fit like a glove. Granted, it fit back in the day, but you had filled out a lot more since college and now your curves accentuated every edge of the fabric. It was knee length, fitted, and solid black. The sleeves curved off your shoulders around your upper arms. You paired the dress with a pair of black pumps and added a simple necklace to finish the look. You went into the living room and grabbed Coop’s gift and headed back to your room.

A sudden, strong throbbing sensation caused your knees to buckle, almost ending with your ass on the floor. You leaned against the wall for support, mindlessly grabbing at the spot on the back of your skull where the pain originated. It was excruciating. The kind of pain that could knock you unconscious. You felt like you were going to be. You slid down the wall and pulled your knees to your chest, leaning your head against the coolness of the wall. Sweat began to bead on your forehead as you took deep breaths, waiting for the pain to subside. Behind closed eyes, you saw a flash of light and swore you heard the sound of an explosion. You slowly opened your eyes, staring at the ceiling.

_What the fuck is happening,_ you groaned, trying to stand.

Eventually, you were able to regain your balance and slowly made your way back to your bedroom. You checked your reflection and touched up the places around your eyes where tears had swelled and caused mascara to run. Returning to the bedroom, you put the lab coat on over your dress and stared at yourself in the mirror. You were seriously about to do this. All these years of research, work, and late nights had come to this. This would make or break your career—and you were ready for it.

+++++++++++++++++

The drive to the event hall was not busy and you actually managed to show up a few minutes early and get a good parking spot. Upon entering the venue, you saw Nora and Mason hugged up together in the corner, talking and giggling.

_At least he will leave me the hell alone now,_ you thought to yourself, quietly chuckling.

You spotted Coop near the stage making some last-minute adjustments to the device you were about to show everybody. The device that was the main focus and the baby of the entire operation. You were obsessive over its transport to the event hall, shouting orders at the poor moving guys and Mason. You kind of felt bad, but then again, not. That thing was worth thousands of dollars, but it had no comparison to the amount of knowledge that could be gained from it.

You weaved your way around cocktail tables and smiling patrons until you met Coop at the stage. He smiled at you approvingly of the coat.

“It looks wonderful,” he said, pulling you in for a hug.

“Thank you again. I’m so obsessed with it!” you chirped, giving him a miniature girlish twirl. “How much longer until we are ready to go?”

“Just about 5 minutes. Go grab Nora and Mason, will ya? I thought I saw them snogging in the corner over there,” he grumbled, rolling his eyes.

You laughed, “Sure thing, boss.”

You searched for Nora and Mason who were, in fact, in some corner snogging. Gross. The three of you made your way back to the stage and took your seats next to Dr. Cooper. You noticed that Nora did decide to go with that pink dress. Definitely not your thing, but it looked good on her. Mason was, well, Mason. He picked out navy slacks and a light blue button up and matching suspenders. The color choices of the assistants just didn’t sit well with you. You all should have coordinated in black.

Dr. Cooper began the introductions and delivering research findings. Thankfully, you didn’t have to speak during this part. Your job was the explanation during the actual demonstration. Coop went on for some time talking numbers, statistics, formulas, and so on. All of the details did tend to bore you. You were ready to actually be in action and show them what you have accomplished.

Coop eventually finished his spiel and gestured for you to take over. You rose from your seat and began to address the crowd before you. They were scientists, like yourself. Some working for the federal government, some working for colleges, and some working for independent research facilities. More than that, they looked like money and money equaled funding.

“Welcome, ladies and gentlemen. My name is Dr. Y/L/N and I am one of the leading quantum physicists on this project,” you started as Nora and Mason moved behind you to begin preparations for the demonstration.

“What we are about to show you is going to forever change the way we look at the world. As scientists, we often ponder the theories surrounding alternate dimensions. Gaps in a time span. A Mandela effect, if you will. Our demonstration today will show you how with the use of scientific data, we are able to manipulate the actual atoms composing an object and transport it to a different place.”

Some of the audience members sat up straighter, completely intrigued. You smirked.

“For our first demonstration, we will be using a simple pen,” you said, showing the pen to the onlookers and placing it into the departure chamber on the machine. You closed the hatch and began the sequence.

The people in the audience watched in awe as the pen seemed to disintegrate into a small white light. Not 10 seconds later, the pen reappeared in the arrival hatch, rendering an applause from the eager audience.

You smiled to yourself, the first demonstration complete.

“For our next demonstration, we are going to transport a tomato plant. Now, because this is organic matter, our sequencing is going to vary. The goal is to, one day, apply this knowledge to other living things such as an animal or perhaps, a human being.”

You placed the tomato plant in the hatch, shutting it. You began entering the new sequence into the computer when you felt that prick at the back of your neck.

_Not now,_ you hissed in your own mind.

The tingle vanished as you finished your coding. This transport was the make it or break it one. The ability to move organic matter would shake the scientific community. You smiled widely as you stepped to the side and pressed the button to initiate the transfer. Audience members sat forward on their seats, anticipating what would happen next.

But nothing happened. That was weird. You had done this hundreds of times. Why wasn’t it working? You looked back at Nora and Mason who both shook their heads in confusion.

“My apologies, everyone. I will reset the coding and restart this process, please bear with us.”

You opened the hatch and began re-coding when you felt that prick again. Except this time, it wasn’t a prick. It was like a knife. You grunted in pain but managed to continue with your work.

You heard it before you saw it. The loud crack that escaped your precious machine was absolutely deafening. The white light that flashed before your eyes was blinding. The room was spinning as you began to fall down, down, down. You heard screams and saw flashes of people running out of the room. You reached for the power cord plugged to the generator in an attempt to dismantle the situation. Light pulsated out of both hatches on the machine as you tried to edge closer to it. Finally, you had hold of the power source.

“Y/N!!!! DON’T! YOU COULD KILL YOURSELF!” Coop shouted, but it was too late.

You yanked the cord will all the strength you could. But in that moment, two things happened at once: First, the power from the generator was cut, but the machine kept running. Light seemed to move faster and the vibrations coming from it shook the chandelier in the middle of the room. Second, a huge beam of light engulfed your every being. You listened as Coop, Nora, and Mason screamed your name.

You listened to their screams just as you felt like you were flying before landing on the ground with a hard thud. You glimpsed around before darkness consumed you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, I make up shit about science and Star Wars.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to chapter 3! Thank you to everybody that has left kudos! Leave me some comments as well! Our reader is about to get acquainted with her new setting and we get more Space Prince. Enjoy.

_Darkness. Heavy, thick darkness. It surrounded your body and clouded your senses. You tried to move. It was useless. It felt like gravity was bearing down into your very soul. You tried to scream. Not a sound echoed in the void you had found yourself in. You reached out to touch something, anything. There was nothing to catch your fall as you tumbled forward, down, down, down…_

You sucked in a gasping breath. Your lungs ached as you tried to steady your breathing, burning from the salty smell in the air. You stilled as blood dripped down the side of your temple. The excruciating pain in the side of your head caused you to wince as you attempted to roll to your side. What had happened? What went wrong? Where was everybody else?

You blinked a few times trying to get your eyes to adjust to the light and dust. Something was different. The scene in front of you began to focus and you couldn’t help but freeze in utter shock. This was not the event hall you had been in prior to the explosion. Had somebody taken you away? Raising to a sitting position and propping against the wall, you began to take in your surroundings, memorizing every detail. The room was dimly lit, the only light entering the room from a large window that seemed to face outward on a large door. There was machinery everywhere covered in dust and seeming like it hadn’t been used in years. Your eyes scanned the room as something glimmered in the light, catching your attention. You crawled toward the object on the ground, hands shaking as you reached out to grab it. You picked it up and were immediately confused.

Dice. Two golden die tethered to one another by a chain.

You returned to the wall, groaning as you stretched your legs out in front of you. Your new discovery had to give some sort of insight as to where you were. Examining the dice, you quickly realized that you had no idea where you were. The markings on the sides of each die were foreign to you. Alien. You pocketed the dice and sighed.

 _What is happening…_ you thought. You tried to replay the events at the demonstration in your mind. You remembered that the first demonstration went exactly to plan. You remembered that something went wrong with the second demonstration. You remembered that when you began its coding sequence, you felt that all too familiar prick at the back of your neck. Then the explosion, your friends screaming your name. And then, light. Bright light shunned into darkness.

You felt tears swell in your eyes as you began to replay the events. It was your fault. It had to be. You had to have entered the coding wrong, causing the reactor to overload and fry the machine. You pulled your knees to your chest just as a sob began to wrack your body. You clutched at the precious gift Coop had given you. All of your work… All of these years…And for what? To have it be destroyed and for you to find yourself in some foreign place you had never seen before. You grieved for your friends as the realization set in that you may never see them again. You grieved for your life’s work and passion, obliterated before your very eyes.

Your sobbing slowed to hushed breaths as you began to regain your composure. You wiped the tears from your eyes and got to your feet. You walked over to the large window and examined yourself in the reflection. Nothing too bad other than the gash on your forehead and some scratches and bruises littering your legs. The brilliant white lab coat Coop had so graciously gifted you was tinged gray and brown from the dust. Your dress and pumps seemed rather unharmed. You adjusted some misguided strands of hair and stood a little straighter. Whatever is happening, whatever had happened, you would handle it with pride.

Just as you tucked away the last strand of hair and straightened your dress around your frame, you heard the faintest sound of footsteps. Lots of footsteps. Shadows began to cloud the entrance to wherever the hell you were. Whatever small amount of bravery you had was lost in that moment.

You frantically looked around the room for somewhere to hide. In the back corner of the room was a rusted locker, barely big enough for you to fit. You squeezed into the space and pulled the door shut, peering through the slits to what was coming for you. Beings in white armor, with what looked to be guns, began pouring into the facility. A man with bright orange hair and the most hateful expression followed in behind them, shouting orders. Four of the white armored beings entered your area and you froze. You didn’t even breath.

“All clear!” one of them shouted as they exited the room.

You let out the breath you were holding and prepared to wait out their search for whatever it was they were looking for. The orange haired man entered the room and began fiddling with the equipment.

“General Hux,” the white armor started, “there is no sign of the Resistance. It appears they may have escaped through a back tunnel.”

The man, who you now knew to be General Hux, let out an annoyed sigh.

“Very well,” he huffed, “inform the Supreme Leader that they have, once again, escaped.”

“Yes sir.” And the trooper left the room.

General Hux turned back to the equipment, running a hand through his hair and speaking quietly to himself, “If it wasn’t for Ren’s childish antics, we would have had them in our grasp. Pathetic.”

Just then, a vision in black billowed into the room. Hux stood a little straighter at his presence. He looked…familiar.

“Supreme Leader,” Hux said, giving a slight bow.

The Supreme Leader, or Ren, as Hux had previously called him, scowled as he paced the room. He was massive and absolutely terrifying. He seemed to be lost in thought as you watched him face the window and stare out. You still hadn’t gotten a good look at his face, but something in the pit of your stomach told you that you knew this man. You recognized his gait and the way his cape followed behind him. You recognized his dark locks. You had spoken to him, but you called him a different name. You had called him Ben.

Given your current situation, you weren’t sure what caused you to step out from your hiding place. It could have been that you literally had no idea where you were and needed some form of assistance. It could be that you had had like two conservations with him and, for some odd reason, already trusted him. With a trembling hand, you pressed on the latch of the locker and held your breath. As soon as the door made the slightest creak, the Supreme Leader whipped around in your direction.

 _No going back now,_ you thought as you stepped out of the locker and into view.

You saw him. Actually saw him for the first time in complete clarity. He was…gorgeous. He was tall and broad, obviously well-built under those layers of black. Your mind briefly wandered to just how sculpted he was. His face was angular and flecked with beauty marks and framed by glorious raven locks. The scar that ran across his face should have intimidated you, but no. It made you that much more attracted to him. His eyes were piercing and ran straight through your soul.

You weren’t sure what to say or do, so you simply lifted your hands to show you were not a threat.

“Don’t hurt me,” you started, “I don’t know how I got here.”

Ben continued to eye you, as if he was in shock.

General Hux turned now, reaching for what looked like a gun on his belt.

“Who are you? Where have the Rebels gone?” he questioned you, moving closer and pointing the gun at you.

“Please! I don’t know what you’re talking about! I don’t even know where I am!” you pleaded, eyeing Ben to say something. He didn’t and it hurt. Tears pricked your eyes as Hux continued on his rampage.

“You will tell us where they have fled to or suffer the consequences!” he bellowed, cocking the gun.

Tears streamed down your face. This was a mistake—a huge mistake. You stayed still with your hands raised as Hux came close enough to touch.

“Ben…” you whispered. “Please.” The tears began to pour.

The sound of his name on your lips seemed to bring him back to the present.

“Hux! Lower your weapon.” That voice. It was even better in person. It was deep, melodic, and intoxicating. It sent shivers down your spine.

“Yes, Supreme Leader.” Hux acknowledged, stepping aside.

Ben, Supreme Leader, whoever he is, stalked toward you. He was menacing but in the way that made a heat pool between your thighs. You lowered your hands as he came to stand in front of you, eyes searching your face.

“Doctor,” he said simply.

 _Oh god, he’s so hot_ , you thought to yourself, cheeks flushing a slight pink.

“Leave us, Hux.”

Hux turned to exit the room, leaving you alone with Ben.

You’re not sure exactly why you did it, but you crashed into his chest, wrapping him in a hug. A sob formed in your throat as tears began pouring from your tired eyes. He went completely rigid under your touch, like a scared animal that had been previously abused.

“I’m sorry,” you gasped, pulling away from him. “I don’t know what happened. I don’t know where I am or how you’re here.” What little piece of sanity you had left felt like it was snapping in that moment. You began to pace around him, hands running mindlessly through your hair as your thoughts began to spiral.

“Doctor,” he said, you continued your charade, mumbling to yourself about how to get back and fix this.

“Doctor…” he said again. You didn’t acknowledge him.

“Y/N!” he shouted, causing you to stop in your tracks and look at him. The sound of your name coming from his full, pink lips made you weak in the knees.

“I’m sorry, I just…I just…” you trailed off, unable to make a coherent sentence as you propped up against a table in the middle of the room.

“You are on the planet Crait.” he said.

Crait? Wasn’t that the planet he had told me he was near? That would mean that…

“Crait…That’s nowhere near Earth…”

“No, it’s not. It’s actually hundreds of millions of star systems away. I was able to triangulate your location and had tried to reach out to you earlier to tell you, but you shut me out,” he replied, leaning on the table opposite you with arms crossed.

“Wait, you tried to reach out to me?” you questioned, rubbing the back of your neck where that tingle always seemed to originate. “You can do that? How can you control it, but I can’t?”

He smirked, “Well, technically you were able to control it. You responded back to me by shutting me out. If you didn’t have the Force, you wouldn’t be able to do so.”

Wait, wait, wait. What the fuck is happening. What the fuck is the Force and why the fuck did you have it.

He chuckled, shaking his head.

“What’s so funny?” you asked, hands going to your hips.

“Doctor, your thoughts are extremely loud,” a beat, “and are just as filthy as your mouth.”

Your cheeks burned and your mouth hung open as you stared at him in utter shock. He stared back at you, but you refused to avert your eyes. You were embarrassed but you definitely weren’t about to let him have this moment.

“Regardless,” he continued, “I can explain the Force to you at a later time, given our current situation.”

“What do you mean?”

“Earth is hundreds of millions of star systems away. If we were to attempt to travel back and return you to your home planet, we would be dead from old age before we even reached the halfway point.” he said simply, shrugging.

“So that means…I’m stuck here,” you whispered, reality beginning to set in.

“Precisely.”

Your gaze dropped to the floor as the weight of your current situation began to ease onto your mind. Your friends. You’d never see them again. You didn’t have any family save for the random cousins and estranged aunts and uncles scattered across the states, but you had nothing to do with them. No, your mind settled on Dr. Cooper. Coop, the father figure to you. He was getting older and had no one himself. Who would look out for him? Nora, whom you would consider to be your best friend. Mason… Yeah, fuck that. You’re happy to never see him again. What about all the work you had done? Would Coop continue to research? Would he try to find a way to bring you back?

Your thought process was interrupted as General Hux appeared in the doorway.

“Supreme Leader, we have finished searching the caves and have found nothing. Our presence is requested on the Finalizer for briefing.” He eyed you, obviously confused at your tear stained face and your affiliation with Ben.

“Very well,” Ben said. “Y/N, I am going to assume you would like to return with us to the ship. Considering you don’t really have any other option.”

You nodded and wiped the tears from your face. You stood up on shaking legs and exited in the room ahead of Ben, following General Hux through the opening in the wall. You looked around as you noticed hundreds of the armored soldiers standing at attention or moving ahead of you. Wrapping your arms around your torso, you continued forward even though you could feel their stares and saw, out of the corner of your eye, a few heads turn your way. The ground was extremely uneven, making it difficult to walk in the black pumps that still confined your aching feet. Stopping briefly, you popped each shoe off to walk barefoot. You heard the slightest chuckle behind you. You whipped around facing the Supreme Leader and narrowing your eyes into daggers. You picked up your shoes and held your head high as you continued to follow Hux.

Upon crossing the threshold of the opening, your surroundings startled you. Bright white stretched for miles and the smell of salt burned your nose. You noticed that while others were walking, red appeared under their feet. You glanced back quickly and saw your tracks behind you. You had never seen anything like the environment you were in right now. Just ahead were tall machines that resembled some sort of animal. It wasn’t until you were led toward a solid black aircraft that you understood what they were talking about when they said “ship.”

You stopped in your tracks, just a few yards from the entrance of the ship. You hated flying and it made you terribly ill. Little did you know that Ben almost ran right into you before stepping around to face you.

“Problem?” he inquired.

You gulped, “I didn’t know that when you said ship you meant flying.”

He looked at you, slightly confused. “Of course, did you expect an actual boat?”

You nodded.

Amusement played across his face as he spoke, “It’s completely safe. We will be fine.”

We. Why did you like the sound of that?

“Okay. So, where are we going?”

He glanced toward the sky and pointed toward what looked like a small, white triangle hovering in the air, “There. That’s the Finalizer.”

Uhm, holy shit. You were going into outer fucking space? He had told you he was somewhere in the Outer Rim near the planet Crait. Why are you so dense? At that point you should’ve figured it out. Idiot.

“Come,” he said, gesturing you forward, “I promise it will be okay. Do you trust me?”

You paused. Did you trust him? Did you really have an option not to?

“Yes,” you spoke softly.

The smallest smile played on his lips as he ushered you forward up the ramp. It was like nothing you had ever seen before. So many controls flashing varying colors as you stared out a blood red glass window. You weren’t sure what to do, so you stood quietly in the corner until Ben approached you.

“If you like,” he started, “I can make this trip easier for you. In time, you will get accustomed to space travel, but it can be unruly for someone who has never even left a planet.”

“How can you help me?”

“Come with me,” he said as he turned down a hallway.

You practically had to run to keep up with him. You were average height for a woman, but god damn. His legs were SO fucking long. You were practically out of breath by the time you reached a door. With a wave of his hand, the hatch flew open. You were startled and somewhat turned on by the sight. Again, why the fuck are you like this?

He entered the room and you followed behind. The room was bare except for a bed covered in black sheets, a side table, and an armchair. To your right was what you assumed to be a closet. A bathroom lit up to your left. Your eyes wandered the room before they settled on the man standing in front of you. He had his eyes locked on you and had that distant expression on his face again.

“Is something wrong?” you asked.

Ben shook his head and walked over to the closet where he pulled out a black sweater. It was definitely not your size and looked as if it would swallow you. Was he giving you his clothes to wear?

“Yes,” he said. It took you a minute to realize that he was answering your thoughts. Your face flushed.

“You can wear this for now until I am able to get you better attire. If you would like to shower, the bathroom is just through that door. You can dispose of your dirty clothes in the bin.”

“Okay,” you said removing the lab coat and folding it neatly and then putting it on the table, “but I need to make sure nothing happens to this coat. It means a lot to me, even if it is dirty,” you said as he returned from the bathroom with a towel set for you.

“I will see to it that it is laundered and returned to you,” he replied. His eyes quickly raked over you, taking in your now exposed figure. You hadn’t thought about the fitted dress you were wearing or the cleavage you were exposing until you saw his eyes drink you in and then travel to meet your own. Your cheeks burned from embarrassment as you wringed your hands behind your back.

Ben cleared his throat, “We will be taking off in 20 minutes. Shower quickly and then I will come back to help you.” He turned and hurried out the door without another word.

That was weird. Was he just as embarrassed as you? If he was, he definitely wasn’t showing it.

You grabbed the towels and Ben’s sweater and stepped into the bathroom. It was a very simple set up with a stall type shower, a toilet, and a small sink with a mirror above it. You stripped out of your dress and tossed it into the laundry bin, but kept your underwear. Leave it to you for something like this to happen and you’re wearing nothing under the dress but a lacy black thong. Great. After turning on the shower to heat, you started taking down your hair and gazed at yourself in the mirror.

You looked like total shit. Like, hit by a fucking truck shit. The gash on your forehead looked like it was starting to scab over. You ran your fingers through your hair and grabbed a washcloth before stepping into the shower. The hot water danced over your skin, relaxing some of the sore muscles in your neck and back. You looked to your right and saw dispensers on the wall for what you assumed to be shampoo, conditioner, and body wash. You were right. You quickly washed your hair, rinsed, and added conditioner while you washed your body with the cloth and soap. You delicately cleaned around the wound on your head and washed your face free of makeup.

After rinsing your body and hair again, you turned off the water and grabbed a towel before stepping out. You quickly dried off, threw your hair up in the towel, and slid your thong back up your legs. You dried your thick ass hair as best you could with the towel before grabbing Ben’s sweater and throwing it over your head.

It was huge. It absolutely swallowed you. The sleeves hung way past your hands and the hem came down almost to your knees. At least it was almost like a dress. It wouldn’t reveal too much.

You moved back into the main room and plopped down in the armchair. Were you supposed to tell Ben you were finished? Not really sure what to do, you thought back to how he had said he could hear your thoughts. What was it he said? That your thoughts were loud? You wondered if you thought about it if he would hear. Worth a try. You closed your eyes and concentrated on Ben.

 _I’m finished with my shower,_ you thought.

Not two minutes later, the hatch flew open and Ben stormed in. It startled you and caused you to jump to your feet.

He smirked looking at you in his sweater. You knew that’s what it was about. Arrogant ass.

You broke the silence, hands going to your hips, “So, how can you help me, Supreme Leader?”

Apparently, you using his title did something to him because he seemed to shift uncomfortably.

“Lie down in the bed and cover up, space can get pretty cold,” he said.

You did what he said, pulling your hair out from under your back and rolling on your side to face him. “What now?”

“You trust me, correct?”

You nodded, “Yes.”

He squatted next to you as he spoke, “I’m going to put you to sleep. Do not resist. You will feel very tired and eventually, will fall into a deep sleep. I will wake you when we reach our destination. Is that okay?”

Put you to sleep? How could he do that? Must be something about that Force thing he was talking about.

“Okay,” you replied, rolling farther onto your stomach and bringing a knee up to be in your normal sleeping position. As you did so, the sheet slid down, revealing the uppermost part of your thigh. Almost your ass. You quickly grabbed the sheet, but you knew he saw it. The faintest bit of pink flashed across his pale cheeks.

“Ready?” he asked.

“Yes.”

“You will sleep,” he said while waving a hand over your face.

“I will sleep,” you replied, completely monotone.

You sat there for a minute before you felt anything.

“Ben,” you yawned, “I don’t think it worked…” you said as you felt your mind getting foggy.

Your eyes grew extremely heavy and the last thing you heard before drifting into a deep sleep was the sound of Ben’s voice: “Sleep well, sweetheart.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Are you feeling the slow fucking burn yet?! I warned you. *insert evil laugh here*


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to Chapter 4! I will say I really struggled with this chapter, so I hope you like it. Our reader gets more one on one time with the Supreme Leader and we learn something new.

_You were in that dream again. Standing in the middle of the grassy field, you watched the waterfall as a rainbow bloomed from where the cascade connected with the lake below. The sun warmed your skin where the misted water had settled. Something about this dream felt different though. You waited for the scene to shift, as it always did, but nothing came. You glanced down at your body and saw it wrapped in flowing cream silk, flecks of gold adorning the sheer sleeves draping from your shoulders._

_This dream felt…peaceful._

_You waded through the tall grass, hands ever so delicately grazing the tops of the wildflowers surrounding you. You edged near the lake and sighed, closing your eyes. Contentment overcame your senses as a smile crept to your face._

_“Y/N…” he said, as you heard the brush rustle behind you._

_“Ben,” you said, turning to face him._

_The sight of him startled you. He was not wearing those heavy black clothes and his face looked more rested. Gray and brown robes covered his body and a silver object was attached to his side. He came to stand directly in front of you before speaking._

_“You look well, Doctor,” he said._

_“I feel…” you trailed off, not sure what to describe what you’re feeling._

_“At peace,” he finished your sentence for you._

_You smiled up at him, “Yes. Exactly that. This dream is playing out a lot differently than it usually does. I must say I like this version better,” you replied._

_“Mm,” he hummed, “maybe you can tell me about the other version at a later time then.”_

_Confusion spread across your face. A later time? This is a dream about him, like always. You just never knew who he was before. Right? And where was the child?_

_You felt him place his hand under your chin, gently tilting your face up to look at him again._

_“We have all the time in the galaxy, but now, it’s time to wake up, sweetheart,” he murmured, thumb caressing your jaw._

_Ben’s figure faded and as it did, so did the rest of the dream._

Your eyes fluttered open and tried to adjust to the light surrounding you. You rolled on your back, stretching and letting out a long yawn. That was the hardest you had slept in literal years. You shifted under the silken sheets, causing them to slide down your body. You stared at the ceiling, momentarily confused at your surroundings. Someone clearing their throat caused you to jolt into a sitting position, eyes darting around the room, before settling on the man resting in the armchair.

“I see you’re awake,” Ben said, his voice colder than the one that had induced sleep on you.

 _Holy fucking shit, he scared the hell out of me,_ you sighed to yourself, pulling the sheet back up to cover your legs.

“Yeah, no shit. You scared the fuck out of me,” you said, running a hand through your now dried hair.

He chuckled softly, “I do apologize for that, Doctor. We have reached the Finalizer. I’ve cleared the hangar so we can exit without disruption.”

“Okay,” you said, sliding off the bed. You briefly forgot about your lack of pants and hurriedly tugged the sweater back down toward your knees. You’d never been particularly self-conscious before, but he made you feel that way for some reason. You hoped he didn’t see, but you knew he was looking.

Ben stood and waited for you in the doorway as you ran to the bathroom and threw your hair in a semi-decent bun with the pins left over from taking your hair down. You grabbed your lab coat and pumps from the side table before following him out the door. The feel of the cold metal on your feet was harsh, so you quickly stepped into the shoes before following Ben towards the exit ramp.

 _It’s so fucking cold,_ you thought, wrapping your arms around yourself. The lab coat was absolutely filthy and you didn’t want to get anything on Ben’s sweater he so graciously offered you. Ben stopped before heading down the ramp and turned to face you. He reached up and unhooked his cape from his shoulders before placing it around your own. The gesture shocked you. It swallowed your frame and without your pumps, definitely would’ve been dragging the floor. Your face burned as you looked at him in shock.

“Thank you,” you practically whispered.

He gave you a curt nod before turning and continuing out of the ship.

Stepping out into the hangar, your jaw dropped. There were other crafts surrounding you, all black like the one you had just exited. Some had a spherical center with flat sides while others looked more like they would transport something. It wasn’t the ships that caught your breath though. To your right, a huge opening looking out into open space. You broke away from Ben and edged toward it. You stood in awe as you watched other ships pass by and the planet you had just left grow smaller in the distance as the Finalizer pulled away from it.

“It’s beautiful…” you whispered, jaw still hanging open as you clutched the cape farther around you.

You felt a presence behind you, causing you to turn.

“I’m sorry, I’ve just never seen anything like it,” you said, shrinking in on yourself.

“I understand,” he replied, “we can explore space more. It really is beautiful.”

Something about the way he said it and the way he looked at you made you think he wasn’t only talking about space.

You tucked a stray hair behind your ear before following him across the hangar and into multiple hallways. Like before, you had to lightly jog to keep up with him. You passed all sorts of people dressed in officers’ uniforms and the white armored people as well. They seemed to cower against the sides of the walls as the two of you passed by, muttering, “Supreme Leader,” under their breath. What was a Supreme Leader exactly? And why were they scared of Ben? You could always ask him. You turned down a hallway before standing in front of what looked like an elevator. The door slid open and the two of you stepped in.

The ride in the lift was horribly quiet and there seemed to be some sort of tension in the air that you couldn’t place. The lift stopped abruptly, causing you to grab the railing for support. The door slid open and Ben exited, you following close behind. At the end of a long hallway was a set of black double doors, guarded by two men in masks. They were terrifying. One of them wielded a scythe while the other had an executioner’s ax. You hid behind Ben, making yourself as small as possible. As you got closer, they kneeled with their heads down.

“Supreme Leader,” they said in unison, voices distorted through their masks.

“Ap’lek, Vicrul,” Ben said as they rose in front of him.

You could feel their eyes you as you tightened your grip on Ben’s cape. They were massive, but not at tall as Ben.

“This is Dr. Y/N,” Ben said, ushering you around him, “she will be staying here, so she has full passage into my quarters.”

 _His_ quarters? Oh god. They’re probably thinking you’re some slut he brought back home with him.

“Milady,” they said in unison again, giving you a small nod.

A weak “hi” was all you could manage as you shrunk into Ben’s side.

A chuckle came from the one holding the scythe, “Doctor, we will not harm you. We are here for yours and the Supreme Leader’s protection.”

You nodded as Ben led you both into his quarters, closing the door behind you. 

The room was simple, but elegant. There was a small kitchenette and a living area. On either side of the room were small staircases leading to black doors. With a wave of his hand, the lights turned on and the black wall that was directly in front of you disappeared, turning into a huge bay window looking out into space.

You stepped out of your shoes and removed Ben’s cape, neatly folding it and placing it on the dining table with your lab coat. You walked over to the where Ben was standing looking out into the abyss. He didn’t seem to acknowledge you, still staring off. The silence between the two of you was deafening and it made you shift uncomfortably. You had to break it.

“So, what’s a Supreme Leader?” you asked.

“What?” he said, looking at you confused.

“Those people with the white armor and those two outside called you a Supreme Leader. What does that mean?” you asked again.

He chuckled and moved to sit on the couch, motioning you to join him. You did, tucking your legs under you and facing him.

“First of all, ‘those people in the white armor’ are called Stormtroopers. The two outside are Ap’lek and Vicrul, part of the Knights of Ren.”

“Okay, but that doesn’t answer my question,” you said, cocking an eyebrow.

He ran a hand through his hair and sighed. Dear god, you wanted to run your hands through it so bad. Ben gave you a smirk as if he had heard what you said. Oh… right. He probably did.

“I am the Supreme Leader of the First Order. Every ship you see out that window is at my command. Every individual on board any of them is at my command. Our goal is to establish a new order in the galaxy, one that has structure and remains at peace, no matter the cost,” he said.

“So, you’re like the president? Like how where I’m from on Earth, we have a president. We elect a new one every four years.”

“Yes and no,” he continued. “Yes, in that I am the face of our government. No, in that I have absolute authority and nobody elected me. I took my rightful place. We have gained power through conquest.”

Oh… _oh._

You wringed your hands in your lap as the truth of what he had said began to dawn on you. He was basically a warlord. He “took” his place as Supreme Leader, which probably meant he had killed somebody in order to gain power.

“You’re right, I killed my master, Snoke,” he said, responding to your thoughts.

Your eyes snapped to his, “Can you please stop doing that? I’ll go fucking insane if I have to be concerned that you’re in my head 24/7.”

“Is there a reason you don’t want me in your head?” he asked, edging closer to you, eyes darkening.

You gritted your teeth. To be honest, you didn’t have much to hide from him. It was more annoying that anything. Obviously, you didn’t want him knowing about embarrassing moments you had during your teen years. Like when you had your first kiss with some boy at a football game and your braces got caught on each other’s. Or that time you got fucking wasted at the local bar and walked into the back of somebody’s vehicle, causing the alarm to go off. Or the things you had done in the privacy of your own bed or shower. But that wasn’t all. Your mind briefly wandered to thoughts about your mother. Memories you’ve kept locked away from your mind for years. That’s what you didn’t want him to see—the atrocity you had committed.

“Why should it matter to you? I’d prefer my own bit of privacy seeing as how most people on this ship probably think I’m some pathetic whore you brought back with you. To be really fucking honest, I’m completely at your mercy right now. You could’ve left me back there or worse, let Hux kill me on the spot. Why didn’t you? You don’t know me and have no reason to care, yet you’ve shown me more compassion in this short time together than I’ve ever had from a man. Why? What do you want from me?” Your nostrils flared as you eyed him, waiting for a response.

Your outburst had caught him off guard. He rose from the couch and stalked toward the kitchenette, shoulders rising and falling as he breathed heavily as if he was trying to calm himself. He didn’t respond, just gripped the side of the dining table. He was going to answer you.

You stepped around the other side of the table, ducking your head and forcing him to look at you.

“Tell me why I am here. Now.”

“There is nothing to discuss. I offered you help and you took it,” he said, grip tightening on the table.

“No. There is something you are not telling me. I can fucking feel it. Tell me what is going on or I’ll… I’ll…” you trailed off, not really sure what to threaten the most powerful man in the galaxy with.

“Or you’ll what?” he said, his eyes going black. “Like you said, you’re at my mercy.”

“So there is more to it, but it seems you’re afraid for me to know the truth” you said, arrogantly smirking back at him.

That hit a nerve. The table flew from between the two of you, shattering into the bay window. The table broke into pieces. Your lab coat and Ben’s cape lay discarded in the middle of the room. The crash was loud enough that Ap’lek and Vicrul stormed in, weapons ready. Their masks surveyed the room before settling on the two of you, breathing down each other’s necks.

“Just having a friendly discussion,” you sweetly said to them, batting your lashes, “we don’t need your services, gentlemen.”

They seemed to tense at you addressing them directly. Good.

“Supreme Leader?” they questioned, but Ben stalking towards one of the staircases was the only answer they needed to leave the room.

“Absolutely fucking not. You’re not leaving this unanswered!” you fumed, trailing after him into his bedroom. It mirrored the bedroom that you had slept in on his ship.

He turned suddenly, towering over you. Eyes piercing daggers through your own. You should’ve been scared, you should’ve backed away. You didn’t. He didn’t say anything, just stared down at you as he drew exasperated breaths, his chest heaving.

“Answer me, dammit!” you said, slamming a fist into his chest.

That did it.

An invisible force sent you flying across the room before slamming into the bed. It wasn’t painful, but it did give you some whiplash. Ben didn’t know you well enough to figure out that you wouldn’t go down without a fight, but he was about to find out.

He stalked toward you like a predator hunting its prey. You sat up on your knees at the edge of the bed, absolutely seething.

“Do you want to know the fucking truth, Doctor?” he raged, spitting the words at you through gritted teeth.

You rose to stand on the end of the bed so you could be eye-level with him, “Yes,” you hissed.

“The truth is for the last twenty-four fucking years of my life, I’ve seen you. I’ve seen your face in every dream I’ve ever had. It fucking haunted me. I never knew who you were or where you were, but I felt like I was always searching for you. Always so close to finding you. Then, in the last probably ten years, I was able to reach you through a dream. To ask you who you are. And then to actually connect to you. And then to learn your location. And then to find you on a god damn deserted planet in the middle of an abandoned Rebel base.” He paused before continuing, “We have something that has not been seen in the Force in generations. Something that is completely rare and normally only intact for masters and apprentices or beings that have a close relationship in the Force. I do not know what the meaning of it is.”

You started to speak, but he persisted, “But you,” he said, jabbing a finger in your direction, “you are so fucking unrelenting.”

You were speechless. This was the most he had said to you the entire time. His leather gloved hands squeezed into fists at his sides. You realized you had pushed him too far. Carefully, you took his hands in yours. Rage still beamed off of him, then simmered out as he relaxed in your grasp, hands enveloping your own.

“I’m sorry,” you murmured, eyes staring down at your hands in his, “I didn’t mean to push you. Sometimes my anger takes control of me.”

He sighed, “I understand that more than you could ever imagine.”

You gave him a small smile and went to sit on the edge of the bed, pulling him to sit with you. You leaned into him, resting your head on his shoulder. Again, he went rigid under your touch, but relaxed and wrapped an arm around your waist.

“You said you’ve seen me for the last twenty-four years?” you questioned, focusing on the obliterated dining table in the living area.

“Yes.”

“I guess that makes sense because I am twenty-four. I’ll be twenty-five this year,” you paused, “How old are you, Ben?”

“Thirty,” he said, “and I supposed that does make sense. I believe that as you got older, your connection to the Force grew stronger.”

“Well, that explains a lot,” you replied, a small laugh leaving your lips.

He pulled away to look at you, “What do you mean?”

“I don’t know,” you started, “it just seemed like I was always kind of lucky, ya know? Like if I got lost while driving I was always able to find my way back. Or I could tell when someone was walking towards me or who was on the other side of a door. Stuff like that.”

“Hmm, well, we can always work on your connection to the Force. I’d like to show you to your room though, if that’s okay with you?” he asked.

“My room? I thought I was staying in here with you?” you asked, confused.

He swallowed and eyes danced across your face, “Do you want to stay in here with me?”

“I’d rather not be away from your quarters, especially since this environment is completely new to me.”

He laughed, “No, Doctor, I had a separate bedroom prepared for you in my quarters. Of course, you’re welcome in here as well.”

“Oh,” you blushed, “thank you, Ben.”

He led you back down the stairs, across the living area, to the opposite set of steps and into your room. It was similar to his, but there were feminine touches added here and there. A vanity was positioned next to the bed with cosmetics lined for your use. Flowers of all colors that you had never seen before were stationed at various points in the room.

“I had a few things added…” he trailed off, unsure of your reaction.

You wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him into a hug, definitely startling him. He lightly wrapped an arm around your waist, hugging you back.

“Thank you, Ben! It’s more than I could have ever asked for!” you beamed up at him and turned to explore the room. He sat in the armchair and watched you.

Your room had a bathroom that, THANK GOD, had a tub and a separate shower. You were pretty sure that tub was big enough you could completely submerge in it. You went to another door and it opened to a massive walk-in closet. The lights flicked on as you entered. Garments ranging from sleep clothes, to everyday outfits, to elaborate gowns cascaded from the walls. Rows of shoes and jewelry covered one part of a wall. Everything you saw was some shade of gray, black, or red. Perfect. You walked to the dresser and opened the drawers. Bras, underwear, and socks were inside. You opened the last drawer and your eyeballs almost popped out of your skull.

Lingerie. Like, really, really, sexy lingerie. All of them some shade of black or red.

You shoved the drawer shut and your face fucking burned. Did he pick that out for you? Oh, my god. Granted, you’d love to give him a show in one of them, but you pushed that thought to the very back of your head. Now, teasing him about buying it… That you could do.

You closed the door to the closet and went back to the sitting area.

“It’s perfect!” you said.

“I’m glad you like it, Y/N.” he said, giving you a small grin.

“Yeah, I really liked that last drawer of the dresser. You know, the one that had the lingerie in it?” you teased him.

His eyes grew wide, “I…uhm…I just had the closet stocked with things that are popular in Coruscant. I didn’t really look through everything they sent.” His face burned. He was cute as shit like this.

You laughed. Like, belly laughed so loud it echoed. Tears ran down your face you were laughing so hard. Shit, this was hilarious.

“I’m kidding, I’m kidding,” you said, wiping your eyes dry and trying to catch your breath.

Ben just looked at you with a scowl.

“Oh! I almost forgot!” you said, jogging back to the shattered dining table and carefully picking up your lab coat and Ben’s cape, careful to not step on a piece of wood.

You returned to your room, handing Ben his cape. You removed the lapel pin from your coat so you could throw it in the laundry bin. You just remembered the dice you had found on Crait.

You pulled the dice from your coat and went to sit in the armchair opposite of Ben.

“I found this whenever I woke up on Crait, do you know what it is?” you asked, handing it to him.

Something about him changed. He nervously shifted in his seat and his lip quivered. He sat in silence. Staring at the dice in the palm of his hand.

“Ben? Are you okay?” you asked, reaching for him.

He stood unexpectedly, walking towards the door before turning to face you.

“I need to meditate,” he quietly said, dropping the dice into his pocket, “Ap’lek and Vicrul are at your disposal if you need assistance. There is food and drink in the kitchen. Please do not disturb me.”

He continued across his quarters as you followed after him. The door to his bedroom closed and a small click let you know it had been locked.

You stood in the middle of the demolished dining room table, unsure of what turmoil you had just cause him. You decided to give him some space and returned to your bedroom, shutting the door and locking it behind you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The burn is sooooo slowwwww.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anddd here's chapter 5! Reader makes some new friends, surprises the Supreme Leader, and SMUT AHEAD!

The knock at your door is what woke you. Sometime the night before, you had fallen asleep, holding the lapel pin given to you by Coop in a tight fist close to your chest. You missed home and longed for your friends. The icy feeling of floating in the middle of nowhere chilled to you to the fucking bone. Space was cold, but if you had to be completely honest with yourself, Ben made it warm.

“Just a minute!” you hollered toward the door. You quickly adjusted the pajamas you had changed into and brushed your hair away from your face. You opened the door to find a black mask staring down at you.

“Doctor,” Vicrul said, “I’m sorry for waking you, but it’s almost 1200 hours. Master Ren has left his quarters for the day and has instructed Ap’lek and I to keep you company.”

You wrapped your arms around your torso as you spoke, “So, it’s just the three of us today?”

He lightly chuckled, “I suppose so, Miss Ren.”

You nodded, shutting the door to get dressed. Miss Ren? What the hell did that mean? Who knows.

You threw your hair in a high bun before taking a quick shower. You wrapped the towel around your naked body as you browsed through the closet for something to wear. You opted for some black leggings and a black tunic top and grabbed a sports bra and some underwear. The tunic hung just a little too long for your taste, so you tied the fabric in a knot near your hip. You quickly brushed your hair and braided it to the side before exiting into the living room.

Vicrul and Ap’lek sat in the armchairs, their massive frames and weapons taking up most of the living area. You held back a laugh as you couldn’t help but think of how cartoonish the scene is. You also noticed the destroyed dining room table had been cleaned up and replaced with one exactly like it.

“Hey guys,” you said, offering a small wave.

They nodded in unison, giving no reply.

 _Oooookay…_ you thought, _this is going to be a long fucking day. Do they always wear those damn masks?_

Just then, they both erupted in laughter, startling you.

“What’s so funny?” you asked, immediately feeling self-conscious.

“Master Ren was right,” Ap’lek said, “your thoughts are obnoxiously loud.”

Your jaw went slack as you stared at them. So, they could use the Force like Ben and they could hear your thoughts. Great.

You dug through the kitchen cabinets until you found a mug and started boiling water for tea.

“Well, sorry for annoying you with my thoughts. I really don’t have any idea about anything to do with the Force,” you said, dipping the tea bag into your cup.

“Apparently not,” Vicrul said, laughing.

“Cut the shit, Vicrul. I didn’t ask to come here.”

They both went silent, masks boring into you as you came to sit on the couch opposite them.

You sighed, “Seriously though, do you guys always have to wear those masks?”

Simultaneously, they both reached up and undid the latch on their helmets. They opened with a hiss and they dropped them on the ground beside them. You were honestly shocked that they had done it.

Ap’lek was tanned with dark brown eyes and brown hair. Vicrul was the complete opposite, blue eyes and white blonde hair. They were attractive and a few years older than you, but they were nowhere near as beautiful at your Space Prince.

You smiled in satisfaction as you sipped your tea.

“So, how long have you known Ben?” you asked.

“Ben?” Vicrul chuckled, “Master Ren definitely has got it bad if he’s letting you call him that.”

Ap’lek laughed as well, “Definitely. He’d kill anybody else who dared call him that.”

Confusion spread across your face as you spoke, “Is his name not Ben? Why do you call him Master Ren?”

“That is not our story to tell, Miss Ren,” Vicrul answered, “but the Supreme Leader goes by Kylo Ren. We call him Master Ren because we are his Knights.”

You nodded, finishing your tea, “But why are you calling me ‘Miss Ren’?”

They both cocked their heads, looking at you.

“Is that not what you are?” Ap’lek questioned. “His partner, his equal, his lover?”

Your face fucking burned.

“Uhm,” you started, “I’m not exactly sure how to answer that. He told me were something that the Force hasn’t seen for generations. I don’t really know what he meant.”

“Princess, we’ve known Master Ren for years. He has been a different man ever since he was able to actually connect with you in the lab,” Vicrul said.

“Oh…” you couldn’t believe what you were hearing. It was obvious that Ben cared for you, but you never thought he could possibly return affection in that matter. It wasn’t that you thought he wasn’t capable you just didn’t think he would ever care for you in that way.

“Regardless, that is business for the two of them, Vicrul.” Ap’lek came to your rescue on that one.

“Yeah, yeah, okay,” Vicrul agreed, waving his hand, “but you gotta let us know if things get heated between the two of you. I’ve never even heard Ren talk about a sex life.”

“Fucking asshole,” you said, returning to the kitchen to wash your cup. “Anyway, what are we going to do today?”

“What did you have in mind, Princess?” Vicrul asked.

“What do you guys like to do for fun around here?” you countered.

They both grinned from ear to ear.

+++++++++++++

“This is so fucking cool!” you shouted, drilling a couple more headshots into the targets.

“How the fuck are you such a good shot?” Ap’lek asked as you returned the blaster to the table with the others.

You had a few hidden talents that literally nobody knew about you—except for Vicrul and Ap’lek now. After moving away from home, you took multiple self-defense classes and even took up time on your local firing range. You got pretty good with a handgun during your classes and eventually tried other weapons like a rifle. The blaster didn’t have many differences than a normal gun, except it had less recoil and was easier to aim. You shrugged at Ap’lek as Vicrul gawked at you.

“I took some gun handling classes back on Earth and became pretty skilled with the weapon. This is really not too different,” you said.

“Well I’d be damned,” Vicrul started, “if you weren’t Master Ren’s girl, I’d shoot my shot at you.”

You rolled your eyes as you finished cleaning the weapon before returning it to storage. You continued to browse around the training facility. Literally every weapon you could imagine donned its walls and various kinds of equipment were placed around the room. At the back was a set of double doors.

“What’s back there?” you asked, gesturing towards the doors.

“Ah,” Ap’lek joined you at your side. “That’s Master Ren’s private training facility. He often goes in there to meditate or train with his lightsaber.”

“What’s a lightsaber?” you asked, continuing to stare at the doors.

“That you will have to ask him. None of us wield one. I’m sure he would show you his,” he said, following next to you as you continued touring the space.

Vicrul busted out in gut wrenching laughter behind you.

“I’m sure he would _love_ to show you his lightsaber!” Vicrul howled with laughter behind you.

You stopped dead in your tracks, swinging around to stare at Vicrul. You aren’t really sure what you did or how you did it, but anger flooded every part of your body and seeped out of your fingertips.

Throwing a hand in his direction, you yelled, “SHUT THE FUCK UP!”

As you did, Vicrul was thrown through the air and slammed against the wall behind him. Spears and axes clattered to the ground. You stared in shock as you took in the scene you had just caused. Ben had done the same to you, throwing you on the bed, but it wasn’t nearly as forceful. How did you do that? Holy shit you are going to be in so much fucking trouble.

“Damn, Princess. I didn’t know you had it in you,” Vicrul said, rubbing the back of his head where it had collided with the wall.

“How did I do that…” you all but whispered.

Ap’lek came to stand in front of you, forcing you to look him in the eye.

“Doctor, it seems that you are becoming more in tune with your powers. I find it best if we alert Master Ren so we are better able to serve you and help you control it. Without learning how, you can endanger yourself.” He looked at you with concern, like the older brother you never had.

“I’m so sorry… I didn’t mean to, I just lost control.” You felt tears prick your eyes. You didn’t mean to hurt him. You just lost it.

Ap’lek chuckled, “Trust me, he’s okay. If that’s the worst thing we ever had to endure outside of training with Master Ren, he would’ve killed us all long ago.”

“I’m fine! Don’t worry about me, Princess.” Vicrul got to his feet and cracked his neck before returning the weapons to their places on the wall.

“Are there more of you? More of Ben’s—I mean, Kylo’s—Knights?” you asked, trying to get used to using his title instead of calling him Ben. You would only call him that in private, you figured he would appreciate it.

“Yes,” Ap’leck said, “there are more. There are six of us to be exact. Vicrul and myself and the four others—Cardo, Kuruk, Trudgen, and Ushar. And yes, they all wear masks like us.”

You laughed quietly, wiping away what small tears had escaped your eyes. “Will I ever get to meet them?”

“Oh, definitely. They’re either on a mission or a different ship right now. We’re Ren’s favorites, so we got the pleasure of spending the day with you, Princess.” Vicrul said, joining the two of you in the middle of the room.

“Watch it, buddy, I might have to throw you again,” you teased.

They both laughed before Ap’lek asked you, “What do you want to do now, Miss Ren?”

“Where is Ben?” you asked.

“He’s on the bridge,” Ap’lek started, “do you want to visit him?”

“I think I’d like that!” you said, a little more enthusiastically than you meant to. Heat flushed your face.

“Woah, woah, woah,” Vicrul said. “You’re going to go looking like _that?_ ” He gestured to your tunic and leggings.

“What’s wrong with what I’m wearing?!” you complained.

“Doctor, Princess, listen. I’ve never seen Ren get so tore up over anybody in his life, _especially_ a woman. I’m pretty sure the man is still a virgin—”

“Not my business, Vicrul!” you said, cutting him off.

“Anyway… I’d love to see his face if you showed up in one of those pretty dresses he picked out for you. He was never good at hiding his emotions. He used to wear a mask like the rest of us, ya know.” Vicrul finished.

Ben picked those dresses out for you? You knew it. Of course he did, he just didn’t want to admit to doing such a personal gesture. Though, Vicrul did have a point. You knew it bothered him—in a good way—seeing you in his sweater. His sweater you tucked away in your closet instead of throwing it in the laundry. It smelled like him and you didn’t plan on giving it back. Did that make you a creeper? Oh, well.

“Vicrul, as much as I hate to admit it, I think you’re right.”

He smiled at the small victory before they both replaced their masks over their heads, following you back to Ben’s quarters.

+++++++++++++

_This is too much,_ you thought as you made your way down the hallway, the masked Knights following close behind you. The black, floor length fabric swayed around your legs as you made your way down the various hallways toward the bridge. The dresses Ben had supplied you were immaculate, but you tried to choose one that was sort of plain. The dress was solid black with long sleeves, a deep v-neck which showed your cleavage and sternum tattoo deliciously, and a slit on the right side that came all the way up to your hip. You added a silver metal belt around your waist to accentuate it. You paired it with a pair of strappy black stilettos that laced halfway up your calf. After redoing the braid around the side of your neck, you threw on some simple makeup and paired it with a blood red lip.

“Miss Ren, I can sense your discomfort. You look wonderful.” Ap’lek said from behind you, his voice distorted again from the mask.

“Yeah, Ren is gonna fucking die!” Vicrul snickered.

“God, shut up Vicrul,” you hissed.

Stormtroopers moved to the sides of the walls as the three of you made your way through the Finalizers. Other officers in uniforms moved as well, but their eyes were on you as you made your way closer to the bridge. You had no idea where you were going, but it was like you could sense Ben. Like you could feel him getting closer with each step you took. The Knights never corrected your direction, so you assumed you were going the right way.

Eventually, you reached a large hatch that opened as you approached it.

 _Here we go…_ you sighed to yourself. Shit, let his reaction be a good one.

You saw him. Stalking among officers at various stations, his cape flowing out behind him. His hair looked as glorious as ever. Ugh, how you wanted to run your hands through it and grasp it as he slipped down your body and…

Your thoughts trailed off as his head snapped around to your direction.

_Oh, fuck. He definitely heard that._

You stood in front of the now closed hatch, Ap’lek to one side and Vicrul to the other.

“Go on, Princess.” Vicrul whispered, quietly helping you forward.

You gulped. None of the other officers had even glanced from their stations as you started to make your way toward Ben. Your skirt trailed behind you as your heels clicked with pride against the tile floor. You came to stand in front of Ben and you couldn’t help but drink him in. You had practically forgotten the way he had acted the night before over the dice. You wanted to ask, but you knew that now was neither the time nor the place.

“Y/N…” he said, breathing exasperatedly. He looked in complete awe. Like an aminal that had been starved for far too long. You felt his eyes taking in your appearance, briefly pausing to memorize the way your chest was exposed in this dress. You felt completely vulnerable in that moment, and you wanted him to absolutely ravish you.

“Kylo…” you murmured, glancing up at him through your lashes.

You heard him inhale a sharp breath as your eyes met his.

“I need to talk to you,” you continued. “Something happened while I was with the Knights. I… I accidentally hurt Vicrul,” you said, wringing your hands in front of you.

“I felt your anger and then your discomfort,” he said while taking your hand. You normally wringed your hands out of anxiety and obviously Ben had picked up on it. You immediately felt a sense of calm wash over your body as he held your hand.

“I don’t know what happened, Kylo. I just lost it.”

He hummed in agreement. “There is a vacant conference room at the far end of the bridge. We can talk there.”

“Okay,” you said as you turned to the Knights and motioned for them to wait by the entrance to the bridge.

You entered the conference room as Ben held the door open for you and then closing and locking it behind you. You leaned on the edge of the table as Ben came to stand in front of you. Your leg peaked out from under the slit in your dress, leaving little to be imagined as to what you were wearing underneath.

“Kylo?” he asked.

You blushed. “The Knights said that normally you don’t go by Ben. They said it might be better to refer to you as Kylo when we are not in private.”

He chuckled, pushing a strand of hair behind your ear. “Well, they aren’t wrong. You’re the only one I let call me that, sweetheart.”

You melted right there. How you loved when he called you that. You wished you could record him saying it and play it over and over.

“What did you want to talk about?” he asked, eyes glittering with stars as you moved through space.

“Well, uh. As much as I did want to talk to you about what happened with Vicrul, I also missed you terribly,” you confessed, eyes going straight to the floor.

You felt his finger hook under your chin, bringing your eyes back to his. “You missed me?”

You felt heat between your thighs as he lightly caressed your face. Holy fuck, you wanted to kiss him right here. You were trying so hard to be patient and not rush this moment. You wanted to keep it here forever. You didn’t want to screw it up.

You fluttered your lashes, “I missed you more than you could possibly know, Supreme Leader.”

His jaw clenched as he moved his hand to settle on your waist. He was holding back. Why? He smiled and ducked his forehead to press against your own as he closed his eyes. Again, you thought you were going to fucking melt. If it wasn’t for his hand steadying your waist, you definitely would have hit the floor.

“Tell me about your day, sweetheart,” he said, pulling you toward a sofa on the far end of the room. You followed, sitting beside him as he draped an arm around the back of the couch.

The burning on your face never disappeared and it just intensified as you stared into his angelic face. Why was he so god damn perfect?

“Well, I woke up to Vicrul banging on the door. That was everything but pleasant. I talked to them for a little while and got them to take their helmets off for me.” You chuckled before continuing, “We went to the training room and they showed me blasters—which I’m very good at by the way.”

“What else?” he said, twirling a stray strand of hair that framed your face.

“Vicrul said… something. It made me mad. I completely lost control. It felt like anger was pouring out of every part of my body. I told him to shut up and threw a hand up in his direction. I… I sent him flying backwards and he crashed into the wall, hitting his head really hard.” A beat. “I’m assuming it was the Force, but I’m scared because it feels like it’s just festering inside of me. I don’t want to hurt myself, or worse, you.”

“What did he say?” his tone changed, and a look flashed across his face that almost looked…possessive.

God, your face fucking burned. “Uhm, I’d rather not repeat it. I’m too embarrassed. Let’s just say it was sexual and about you.” You wanted to shrink into the dress and never be seen again.

The laugh that came out of Ben was genuine and you wished you could hear it for the rest of your life.

“Okay, okay,” he started, “but don’t worry about hurting him. He is fine. We will work on controlling your powers soon. I can start training with you tomorrow, if you like.”

“Really?” you beamed.

“Sure. I’d love to teach you,” he said, smiling.

You turned to face him more.

“There’s something else, Ben...” you started, tremendously nervous about what you were about to ask him.

“Mmm?” he hummed, still playing with your hair.

“Do you like my dress?” you asked. Fucking ridiculous. You sound like a child.

His eyes raked over your figure again, taking their time on the exposed area of your chest. You assumed he noticed the tattoo between your breasts.

“You look beautiful,” he said. “What’s that on your sternum?”

“Oh, it’s a tattoo. There’s a little more of it you can’t see,” you said.

_Why the fuck did you just say that?!_

“Oh, really?” he asked, voice sounding heavy with lust. “Maybe you can show me some day.”

That fucking did it. You eyed his full, pink lips as you scooted closer to him. You just wanted to taste them, to fucking drink him in. He leaned forward, eyes locked on yours as you spoke.

“Maybe I will,” you whispered, your hot breath brushing his lips.

He captured your lips in his with a need and a desire so great it could make you fucking drown. You snaked a hand up the side of his face and into the hair at the base of his neck as you opened your mouth against his, tongues swirling against one another. He cupped a hand at your neck as he kissed you with an urgent fire that made you fucking soaking wet. You tugged at his raven locks and the moan that escaped his perfect mouth was almost enough to make you cum right there.

You felt like you were on fire. You needed more of him. You needed to feel him in every fucking sense you possibly could. You swung your knees around and opened the slit of your dress to straddle his lap. He moaned in pleasure as you began to grind against the very prominent bulge in his pants. You bit into his bottom lip and dragged your teeth along it, then using your tongue to soothe the swollen area. His hands traced down your sides and up under your dress to grasp your ass. You gasped in his mouth at the sensation. He ducked his head, kissing and sucking on the sensitive areas of your neck. You couldn’t help but to moan his name in pure ecstasy.

“Fuck, Ben…” you moaned, eyes rolling back in your head. You leaned your head back in order to give him better room for the assault on your sensitive skin. You knew there would be markings from his bites and sucks he had placed there. You didn’t care. Let the whole god damn ship know who you belonged to.

“That’s right, sweetheart,” he breathed against your ear, grazing on it, “you fucking belong to me.”

Ben began kissing and nipping farther down your chest before licking a stripe between your breasts.

“Now, be a good girl for your Supreme Leader and show me that tattoo you were talking about.”

Your cunt was fucking dripping, soaking through your underwear and then onto his hard cock pressed against his pants.

“Yes, Supreme Leader,” you said sweetly as you slipped your arms out of your dress, leaving your chest exposed to him completely.

He took your tits in his leather clad hands, massaging them and pulling at your nipples. You ran your hand back through his hair, tugging on it as you grinded your aching pussy against his bulge. You noticed the red lipstick smeared against his lips and how it left traces of itself on the swollen parts of your breasts. He began to suck on your nipples, teeth lightly biting and pulling on them, causing you to pant heavily.

A blaring alarm caused you both to freeze in place. Of fucking course. Then, a knock at the door.

You quickly wiped Ben’s face clean of lipstick and slipped into the corner of the room to tuck your arms and breasts back inside your dress. You grabbed some tissues from the table and attempted to remove the lipstick smudges that littered your skin.

You saw Ben turn to make sure you were decent before slightly cracking the door to answer it.

“Supreme Leader,” you heard Hux say, “the scavenger—she’s here.”

Wait--she?


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anddd chapter 6! This is a long fucking chapter and I am giving no insight as to what happens. There is, however, a TRIGGER WARNING on this chapter towards the end when the reader is discussing her childhood. Just skip it if you don't want to read. 
> 
> Enjoy!

There was a reason you didn’t get involved in relationships with guys—you were fucking jealous. Actually, possessive is a better word for you. What belongs to you is yours. Nobody else can have it. That being said, when Hux shouted something about a scavenger and described her as a “she,” your possessiveness immediately flared. Granted, Ben quickly explained who the scavenger, Rey, was and what exactly her deal was. You still didn’t care. You just had a feeling. She was somewhere on board the Finalizer, yet to be found by the crew or the Knights.

Ben held a firm grip on your waist as he escorted you back to both of your quarters. He had dismissed Ap’lek and Vicrul so they could hunt for Rey. He did, however, make sure to scare the living shit out of Vicrul before doing so, though, for offending you with his persistent teasing. That, along with the charade you had with him in the conference room, made pure lust seep off your skin.

After crossing the threshold to the living area, Ben closed the door behind you. You stood in the middle of the room, mindlessly running your fingers through your hair you had just freed from the braid. Strong, warm arms encircled your frame from behind, Ben nuzzling his head in the crook of your neck. You sighed in contentment and let your head fall back on his shoulder. He breathed in your scent as he spoke, quiet enough only you could hear.

“Do you know how long I’ve wanted to taste those pretty lips, Doctor?”

A smile spread across your face as you spun around in his arms to face him, “Do you know how long I’ve thought the same about you, Master Ren?”

His face flashed the slightest shade of red before he crashed his lips into yours. His tongue grazed your lips, asking for entrance. You gladly allowed it, swirling your tongue with his own, running hands through his hair while he pulled you somehow closer to his body. He placed a sweet, sincere kiss on your lips before pulling back to look at you.

“Sweetheart, I need you to stay here while I try to find the scavenger. She is strong in the Force and dangerous. I don’t want anything to happen to you, especially if she has that damned traitor, FN-2187, with her.” He tucked your hair behind your ear with one hand and rubbed circles in your waist with his other.

You huffed, annoyed. It would do you no more pleasure than to accompany him and fucking destroy her. Especially since Ben informed you that she was the one who gave him that scar. That bitch did not want to fuck with you, with or without the god damn Force.

“Y/N…” he eyed you like a child who had just been scolded.

“Fine,” you said, running your hands up and down his chest, “but if she somehow makes her way into our quarters, I cannot promise that I won’t retaliate.”

He chuckled, “I wouldn’t expect anything less from you.”

“What does she want anyway?” you asked.

He looked at you, eyeing you as if he should tell you.

“Come with me,” he said as he led you through his bedroom, past his closet, and to a door at the far end of the room. He removed his glove and laid his hand on a scanner and the door opened. Ben replaced his glove as you followed him into the room.

In the middle of the room was a distorted mask on a stand. You’d have to ask him about that later. Ben went to the left side of the room and punched in a code on the keypad, causing the wall to open and a container to come into view. It looked like a solid black cube. He removed it and sat on the step, motioning for you to join him. You did.

He waved a hand over the container and the top disintegrated and two crystals hovered above it. One was a ruby red in a distorted hexagonal shape. The other was golden yellow and looked like a crown with a point on one end in the shape of a diamond. The lit up the room and you couldn’t help but stare in awe. You felt drawn to it like a magnet. You wanted to touch them, but you refrained from doing so.

“What are they?” you asked, leaning in to get a better look.

“They are lightsaber crystals,” he said, waving his hand over them causing them to rotate.

Lightsaber crystals. You remembered the conversation with Ap’lek about Ben’s lightsaber.

“Why does she want them?”

He sighed, “The red crystal is called a Qixoni crystal. It is exceptionally rare and when utilized in a lightsaber, it enhances the user’s Force ability and creates an unmatched powerful blade. The yellow crystal is called a Solari crystal. It is the most powerful crystal, and this is the last one of its kind. The Qixoni cannot be used by anybody other than a Dark Side user. The Solair, however, has to be utilized by a Light Side user and they can never stray from that path,” he explained. You had a thousand questions, but now was not the time. You knew he was in a hurry to find her before something happened.

“There is an exception to the rule,” he continued, “these two crystals can be combined. When combined, they are exceedingly powerful but highly unstable. She wants them for that purpose, to combine them. I can explain later on why that is an issue, but I need to go.” He waved his hand over the box again, causing them to return inside and the top to reappear. He rose from the step and secured it back in the wall. He offered you his hand to stand, which you gladly accepted. You both returned to the living area where he looked to face you straight on again, hands resting on your shoulders.

“Please,” he almost whispered, “stay here. No matter what happens.”

“I promise,” you said, lightly cupping his cheek.

He leaned into your touch before continuing, “I also have something for you, should you need to defend yourself.” He reached into his cape and pulled a small blaster and a harness from his belt. It was small enough you could easily conceal it under your dress on your thigh.

“May I?” he asked.

You nodded and opened the slit in the gown as he kneeled and latched the harness along your upper thigh. His touch sent shockwaves through your lower half. He secured the blaster and lightly squeezed your thigh before standing and placing a kiss on your forehead.

“I will be back. If not, I will send one of the Knights for you, okay?”

“Yes, Supreme Leader,” you said, rising on your toes to press a kiss to his full lips. He smiled and squeezed your hand before exiting your quarters and closing the door behind him.

You looked around the room, unsure of what to do. You ran your hands through your hair and moved to stare out the bay window. You saw ships moving by and saw alarm lights flashing on the other big ships that surrounded you. You were worried about Ben and your newly found friends in Ap’lek and Vicrul. Yes, you were even concerned with Vicrul. You thought about what you would do if they found your quarters. You could honestly give two shits about whatever disagreements were going on between the two sides. What did Ben call them? The Resistance? This wasn’t your fight. Growing up in the states, you learned about all kinds of war between high school and college. No matter what side you were on, there were always unspeakable things done.

You sighed, cracking your neck. You decided to make some tea and find a snack in the kitchenette. You put the water on to boil and began to dig through the cabinets. Everything was still completely foreign to you, even the food. You dug until you found something that resembled crackers and took a few in your hand, tasting them. They were definitely crackers. You finished them and poured the water into your mug, dropping the tea bag in. You leaned against the edge of the counter, lightly blowing across the top of the liquid to cool it down.

Then you felt it. A nudge at the back of your mind.

It was sort of like when you would feel Ben’s presence, but it was different. Way different. You sat the mug down and went to stand in the middle of the living area, facing the door. Someone was coming and they were getting closer. They were on the other side of the door now. They were wondering if what they were searching for was in here. They weren’t just somebody—they were her. It was Rey.

You braced yourself and firmly stood your ground, placing a hand on the outside of your dress where the blaster was hidden underneath. Your breathing was deep and hard, causing the deep cut of the dress to constrict around your breasts. You locked your eyes on the door as it opened, Rey standing in the doorway. She was shorter than you and her figure was straight. Her hair was pulled back into a three-bun style. She was dressed in light gray and cream clothes, a sash hanging from her waist. A staff was slung across her back. A silver hilt was attached at her waist.

 _That’s a lightsaber,_ you thought.

She eyed you, confused, as she slowly entered the room. You knew she didn’t expect anybody to be in here.

“Who are you?” she asked, stopping about ten feet away from you.

“I suppose I could ask you the same since you’re in mine and the Supreme Leader’s quarters,” you said, hands clasping in front of you.

She tensed. Speechless.

“I assume you’re the scavenger he’s looking for.” You already knew she was. You promised Ben to protect the crystals. You were afraid to call out for him and alert him with your mind. Even Ap’lek and Vicrul had said your thoughts were loud. You knew she would hear you. You needed to get rid of her.

“Yes,” she said, slowly approaching you and then stopping again. “But who are you?”

You gave a small smile, “My name is only reserved for the Supreme Leader’s use. The Knights and the rest of the ship and crew refer to me as Miss Ren.” You didn’t want to disclose your identity to her. You wanted to make her think you were of importance. Which, in Ben’s eyes, you were.

She looked at you in total disbelief. A brief look of betrayal flashed across her face. What previous affiliation did she have with Ben? It didn’t sit right with you, so you pressed on.

“I’m not sure what you’ve come for, but I can assure you that it is not here.”

“Where did you come from?” she asked. “I’ve never seen you before, yet here you are. Do you even know what they’ve done? Why are you protecting him? They’ve killed innocents! All for power. He has something that could help the Resistance. We can restore balance!”

Did you know what balance she was talking about? Better yet, did you care? Fuck no.

“I can tell you that I know enough about war to realize that no matter what you think, both ends of the spectrum have done unspeakable things. I have no reason to intervene. This not my fight,” you said simply, slowly pacing in front of her.

She began to circle with you, each of your eyes never breaking their trance.

“It is everyone’s fight,” she said, “the fight between right and wrong. You think you know him, but you don’t. You don’t know how he’s murdered thousands. How he murdered his own father. You will never truly know him.”

You saw red. Anger oozed from every orifice on you. Truth be told, no, you didn’t know those things. You had witnessed his temper and his rage. He had told you of how he came to power. You knew that he was a warlord. You knew he would do whatever it took to rule the galaxy. You knew these things and for some reason, it resonated with you. As for his father, who were you to judge? After enduring the things you had in your life, maybe—just maybe—you were more alike than you originally thought.

A small chuckle escaped your lips as you stopped your stalking, standing in front of Ben’s door. You placed your hands on your hips and you began to speak: “There are things you do not know about me. I’m tired of this. Now, please. Leave.”

She stalked toward you, waving a hand in front of your face as she spoke, “You will take me to the crystals.”

You stared down at her, your heels making you taller than her. Before, Ben was able to put you to sleep by doing a similar mind trick. That was before your powers had grown exponentially. You stared back at her, smirking, before she tried again.

“You WILL take me to the crystals.”

Again, you just stared at her, eyes boring down on her.

“Scavenger, I’m sorry, but your mind trick will not work on me,” you said, swatting her hand away from your face.

She stumbled back, in shock, muttering “impossible” under breath. Suddenly, the doors shot back open and a dark curly-haired man entered. He was wearing remnants of a Stormtrooper outfit, except for the mask, and another man followed behind him, mask on.

“Rey! We have to go, Ren’s—” he stopped, staring at you and Rey, breathing down each other’s necks.

“Well, who do we have here?” he said, running a hand through his hair. What a cocky asshole.

“Miss Ren, and you are?” you asked, lifting an eyebrow.

“It doesn’t matter who he is,” Rey interrupted, “you will take us to the crystals. NOW!” She slung the staff around her back, stopping it right before connecting it with your face. You didn’t even blink. You didn’t even flinch. You held her stare.

“Unfortunately, Rey, I’m unable to fulfill that request. Now, like I said, I find it best if you leave. Especially before he gets back.” You enunciated the “he” in your statement. Her face tore into a scowl, making you extremely satisfied.

She turned away from you and began to storm off, not before you heard a voice slither into your head.

 _I should kill Ren’s whore right here,_ Rey thought, her shoulders heaving as she began to cross the room.

Oh fuck no. You were nobody’s whore. You reached for the blaster at your thigh and fired a shot at the back of Rey’s head, which she deflected with the lightsaber she ignited from her side. She raised a hand and the blaster flew away from your hand and skidded across the tile. She tracked toward you, lightsaber swinging at her side.

“Rey, stop!” the man with the dark hair yelled, “Killing her is the last thing we want to do!”

But she didn’t. She kept moving forward. Rage engulfed you. Your eyes burned from the anger that was festering inside of you. You threw your hand toward her, causing an invisible force to wrap around her throat. Her lightsaber clattered to the ground as she clawed at her throat. You lifted your arm and tightened your grasp, thick gurgles resonating from her throat. She rose into the air, face turning a deep shade of red-purple.

“Next time,” you panted, sweat dripping from your temple, “keep your thoughts to yourself, bitch.”

You threw her from the room, lightsaber flying with her, and into the hallway outside the chamber doors. You looked to the two men who ran after her. You slammed the doors with the Force and dared any of them to enter. You released a breath you didn’t realize you were holding and looked down at your hands.

 _How did I do that…_ you thought in a whisper. Completely dumbfounded, but you were thankful you were able to protect the crystals. You slid down Ben’s bedroom doors to sit on the ground. Your head was throbbing and sweat glistened off your face and chest. You undid your strappy heels from your feet and kicked them off. The heat coming off the back of your neck was too much. You took your hair tie and secured your hair in a low bun. Leaning your head back against the door and closing your eyes, you tried searching for Ben. He was close and getting closer. Just as you were about to drift off, the doors flew open and Ben stormed in, six masked men behind him. His lightsaber was ignited at his side. It was a red cross-guard that sent sparks flying on the floor. He looked primal and insanely fucking hot at the same time. His eyes shifted around the room until they settled on you, propped up in the floor against the doors.

He deactivated the lightsaber as he walked toward you, dropping to his knees beside you.

“What happened?” he asked, brushing your sweat soaked hair away from your face. You opened your eyes and connected with his. He let out a small gasp as he looked at you.

“What’s wrong?” you asked.

“Your eyes… They’re white,” he said.

“What?” You got to your feet with Ben’s help and ran into Ben’s bathroom, gawking at your reflection. He was right. White flame-like shapes extended from your pupils, mixing with the cerulean that surrounded it. You stared into your own eyes until they eventually faded back into their ocean blue color.

You turned to face him in the doorway. He was still breathing heavy and he looked so angry and terrified at the same time.

You walked over to him, burying your face in his chest as he wrapped his arms around you. He began to pet your hair as he spoke.

“I felt a tremor in the Force. Well, it was more like a fucking earthquake. I immediately knew it was you. Sweetheart, what happened?” He pulled back to look at you, arms still encircling your waist.

“She showed up here. I tried to convince her to leave, which I thought I had done. But…” you paused, “I heard her thoughts and it angered me. She caused me your whore.” You slightly laughed before continuing, “So I fired at her and she deflected it. Then, I…I strangled her. I just held my hand up and squeezed. She was floating in the air. It felt…good. Powerful. I should’ve killed her. After all she’s done to you. She said I didn’t know you. That I would never know you.” Your hands tightened into fists.

“Shhh…” he soothed you. “I’m sorry for not leaving some of the Knights to protect you. They thought they had found her. I am, however, so proud of you for defending yourself.”

“Ben, there’s something else. She told me about your father,” he tensed, “and there’s something I need to tell you about me. Other than that, she seemed almost…jealous? There’s more to it, isn’t there?” You looked up at him, jaw set, eyes searching his face. You brushed hair from his eyes and cupped his face. “It’s okay. You can be honest with me. I’m here for you.”

He leaned into your touch and closed his eyes, savoring the moment. “We do need to discuss things. I want us to be open. You matter too much to be anything but that.”

You smiled at him and softly pressed your lips to his. He returned your kiss and sighed against your mouth. He took your hand and led you back into the living room. The six masked men were still here, taking up most of the space.

“Knights,” Ben said.

“Master Ren,” they all said in unison, bowing their heads.

“Some of you have met Dr. Y/N,” he said as you raised your hand to wave at them.

“Hey, Princess,” Vicrul said and you shot him a death stare.

“Better watch it, bud. I can Force choke people now,” you said, hands going to your hips.

He laughed before continuing, “I bet Master Ren will like that real good.”

You thought you did it, but apparently Ben did. Vicrul flew against the wall nearest him, his scythe clattering on the ground. The rest of the Knights tried to stifle a laugh as he got to his feet.

“Sorry, Master. It’s hard not to tease her.”

“Enough, Vicrul.” Ben said. “From now on, all of you will remain stationed on the Finalizer unless moved elsewhere by me. Her safety is too big of a concern for us to be spread apart. And, as her power grows, she will need training with other Force users. Ap’lek, you will stay stationed outside the quarters for now. Ushar will be accompanying you instead of Vicrul.”

“Yes, Master,” they said.

“You are dismissed.” Ben waved his hand, opening the doors and the Knights exited.

You flopped down on the couch, laying across it. You laid your arms across your face and tried to breath evenly.

“Ughhhh…” you moaned.

You felt Ben pick your legs up and he slid to sit under them, placing them in his lap. He kneaded the back of your calves trying to soothe you.

“There is a lot we need to discuss,” he started, “and just know I trust you enough to tell you all of it. There is so much more at stake than just those crystals falling into the hands of the Resistance. There are things I’ve done that I regret. Things that haunt me. I want to tell you all of it…” he trailed off.

You propped yourself up on your elbows and looked down at him. You loved seeing him like this. He was so relaxed around you now. It felt like home.

“I want to tell you all those things about me as well. I think…I think we are more alike than we realize,” you said, eyes lingering on his lips.

He shifted and climbed on top of you, his hair brushing your forehead. He looked into your eyes and brushed his nose against yours. Smiling at him, you ran your fingers through his silken hair.

“I think we are too,” he said, lips pressing to yours in a kiss filled with passion. He pressed his forehead to yours. You loved the sensation. It sent a calming feeling down your spine.

“I need to get cleaned up,” you said, “I’m so fucking sweaty and I’m hungry as shit.”

He laughed as he sat up off you and helped you up. You gathered your shoes off the floor and made your way to your room.

“I’ll shower as well and order us something to eat. Anything you have in mind?” he asked.

You chewed your bottom lip. You know what you wanted to eat, but you weren’t exactly sure if there was anything like it here. “Do you have pizza and breadsticks?”

He raised an eyebrow in your direction, obviously not knowing what you were referring to.

“Okay, so pizza is like a dough that’s baked and has tomato sauce, cheese, and different toppings like vegetables or meat on it. Breadsticks are basically baked dough with spices on it. Anything like that?” you asked, feeling really hopeful that there was something like that on this ship considering there was tea and some sort of cracker in the kitchenette.

He chuckled, opening the door to his room, “I’ll see what I can do, sweetheart.”

+++++++++++++

You finished your shower and brushed your damp hair. You put on some new underwear and slipped Ben’s sweater back over your head. You couldn’t help but wonder at what Ben was going to tell you, especially about Rey. You really hoped it was nothing serious between the two of them, but who knows. You tried to not think too heavily on it. Whatever it was had happened prior to you developing feelings for Ben. Then, you thought about what you were going to reveal to him. Those memories you had repressed for years began to surface. You’d never let anyone in on that part of your life, not even Coop. It definitely was not for the faint of heart, but you knew you could trust Ben.

You made your way out of your room and your heart surged at the scene laid out before you. Ben was lounging on the couch in a sweater like the one you were wearing and loose black pants. He was barefoot and his hair still had water droplets glistening on his hair from his shower. Two wine glasses shone on the table as he poured the dark crimson liquid from the bottle. You stepped around the side of the couch and plopped down beside him, tucking your legs under you and snuggling up to his side. He laughed, wrapping an arm around your shoulder as you laid your head on his chest.

“My sweater?” he asked, amusement playing across his face.

You blushed, “Uhm, yeah…It smells good.” Oh god, why.

He laughed. “You know I can give you a clean one, right? Or you can go in my room and get one.”

 _I’m allowed in his room? That might come in handy…_ you thought and immediately regretted it. His eyes met yours.

“Doctor,” a beat, “don’t tempt me.” You suddenly remembered you had unfinished business with him. Ever since the conference room incident, your mind wandered to his hands—his massive fucking hands—roaming all over your body. Oh, how you wanted to do more than just fucking tempt him.

You smirked, rising to your knees and wrapping your hands around his neck. You leaned in to press your lips to his and, right on fucking cue, there was a knock on the door.

“Are you fucking serious…” you huffed, plopping on your ass and crossing your arms. Ben chuckled and rose to walk toward the door. He opened it and a robot-looking machine came in packing a tray. It looked almost like a human. Like something off the science channel on television. It was a black chrome color and had white, glowing eyes. What the fuck? You stood up and stared in total awe. The robot went to place the tray on the kitchen counter and noticed you looking at it.

“Miss, I am SR-932, service droid. And you are?” it asked, robotic voice and all. Droid, not robot. Got it.

“Uhm, Y/N,” you said, still surprised.

“Miss Y/N, so good to meet you. Now, if you will excuse me.” It turned to exit out the door before quickly bowing to the Supreme Leader. Ben closed the door and picked the tray up, bringing it to the coffee table. He removed the lid and you couldn’t believe it. It looked like a pizza and smelled fucking incredible.

“Does that look right?” he asked.

You didn’t realize how hungry you were and practically dove right in without responding, taking a huge bite and humming in contentment. It was delicious. You looked up and saw Ben smirking at you and you felt your face immediately get hot.

“I’m sorry,” you said, swallowing your food, “I am famished. But this is soooo good.”

“I’m glad,” he said, sitting next to you and getting a piece for himself.

The two of you ate and drank wine in a comfortable silence. Mostly because you were so hungry and couldn’t take a minute to not eat. Ben was apparently just as hungry, scarfing down his food. You finished your food and leaned back on the couch waiting for Ben to finish his. Once he did, he took the tray back to the kitchen and brought back another bottle of wine. Something told you that you were going to need that second bottle for whatever the two of you were about to talk about.

He sat down and poured you both another glass while he spoke, “I’m going to preface this conversation by saying that if I get angry and I tell you to leave or if I need to go into my room, please listen to me.”

You gulped. You remembered the way he launched you across the room. Part of you was afraid, part of you didn’t care. “Okay,” you practically whispered, turning to face him on the couch.

He let out a long sigh, “So, what should we talk about first?”

You looked down at your hands as you spoke, “There’s more to your affiliation with Rey than you let on.”

He took your hand in his. “Yes, there is. Remember my previous master I told you about, Snoke?” You nodded. “Before I killed him, he wanted me to find her and bring her back to the First Order. He wanted to train her to become one of us. He also knew I was vulnerable and conflicted after senselessly killing my father—which we will also discuss. He…He bridged our minds. Unlike how the two of us have it naturally, he forced it on Rey and I. It was a curious thing. It would seem that it was randomly connected at times, but I know now it was Snoke. Since his death, the bond has been all but dead. Also, since his death, you became more prominent in my mind. I was able to see you more clearly, and you I. I had never felt more at peace than those few interactions when I was actually able to get through to you. I assume now that Rey took my curiosity in the bond as something more. Like an interest in her as opposed to just doing what was right when I killed Snoke. Once I took the throne after his death, I tried to get her to join me and rule at my side. Completely as an equal, not as a partner. She refused. Rey thought, for whatever reason, that the bond would work as a way to convince me to abandon the First Order and Snoke. To return to my mother. My mother, who is the leader of the Resistance.”

You were slightly nodding, staring at him as you absorbed everything he had just told you. His mother is the leader of their enemy. That shit’s fucked. Then you thought about his father. You had your own version of his story. You needed to tell him.

“And your father?” you asked, and he instantly went rigid under your touch. He began to pull his hand away, but you grabbed it harder and pulled it back to your lap, scooting closer to him.

“Ben, listen to me. There is something I did that I regret as well. I’m not going to force you to speak on it, but I will speak my truth.” You meant every word you said. You wanted to know every part of him, the good and bad. He ran a hand through his hair as he pulled you into a hug before speaking.

“Snoke was a manipulator. He convinced me to do many things that he swore would bring me more power. They never did. He had told me that by killing my father, I would cut off the ties to my old life and become all-powerful. As soon as I plunged my lightsaber through him, I wanted to die with him. It was senseless and it did not make me more powerful. It split me in half. He wanted me to kill my mother as well. When the time came, I couldn’t do it.” His voice cracked as you looked up at him. His eyes had the faintest brim of tears in them. He continued, “If I would have known then what I know now, I wouldn’t have killed him. My parents had their issues and my father wasn’t exactly the best but murdering him did nothing.”

You sat silent as Ben tried to calm his breathing. You sat up and pushed your hair away from your face as you prepared yourself for the flood of memories that were about to overtake you.

“What I’m about to tell you… I’ve never told anybody,” you admitted. He nodded and he took your hands again, kneading the backs of your hands with his thumbs.

“Whew… Okay.” You braced yourself. “I had really shitty parents, like really shitty. My mom left my dad and I at a young age. I think I was like seven or eight. She was never really around to begin with, but when she left, it was like the last fiber in my dad’s brain snapped. He drank a lot. He did drugs a lot. He was gone a lot. But when he was home…When he was home, it was like he took his anger about mom out on me. The slightest inconvenience and I became his living punching bag,” you let out a nervous chuckle and Ben breathed through flared nostrils. “It’s okay, Ben. Let me finish.” He calmed down and you continued.

“I’m pretty sure he did everything possible to cause me harm besides sexual abuse. He would stick cigarettes to my skin and burn me. He would beat me until my face would be so swollen I couldn’t see. I didn’t want to go to school looking like that, so most days I would skip. The teachers knew, they had to. He took his anger out on me about mom leaving and I began to blame mom for everything I was going through. Right after I turned thirteen, my mom got in a bad car accident that left her paralyzed. She was in the hospital for a long time and I eventually went to visit her. I had so much built up anger and rage from everything I had endured and still endured on a daily fucking basis. I went alone to see her. My dad refused and just waited in the car. I went in her room, and she was asleep. It was in a secluded part of the hospital, just for patients who were close to recovery. She ended up being paralyzed from the waist down. Anyway…” you paused, taking a deep breath, “I sat and watched her sleep for a few minutes. I couldn’t get past the thought that this bitch was the reason I had had so many broken bones and went to sleep hungry so many nights. I didn’t know what I was doing until it was too late. I took a spare pillow and held it over her face until the monitor for her heart stopped beating. I killed her. I was in shock that I just ran before the nurses or doctors even knew that she had stopped breathing.”

Ben’s arms pulled you to his chest as your eyes stared off. You thought it would feel different talking about that, like you would feel sadder. You felt remorse about it and you did regret it, but you were expecting a different reaction. You sat there in Ben’s arms as you came to terms with what you had just told him. You realized you were more alike than you had originally thought. You realized you both had extensive traumas that shaped you into the person you were at this very moment. You realized that this is where you were meant to be. You realized that even if you had the choice, you could never choose to be anywhere else in the galaxy.

You also realized that whatever fantasy Rey lived in, it was completely her own. Ben didn’t care for her in that way and her feelings were hers alone. Obviously, your naturally occurring bond is rare, even Ben said that.

“So,” you started, pulling back to look at him, “our bond is really that rare? We knew each other across god knows how many star systems.”

“Yes,” he said, “what we have it’s…” he trailed off, looking away.

“It’s what?” you prodded further, turning his face back to your own.

He looked at you, eyes swimming with emotion. He looked at you like what he was about to tell you could make or break what you had, like he was afraid of your response. You eyed him and squeezed his hand.

“What we have… It means we are soulmates in the Force.”

Your eyes grew wide as you realized what he had just said. _Soulmates?_ You, of all people, had an actual soulmate? You were a mix of excited and absolutely fucking terrified. Of course, you wanted to be with him in every way possible. But what scared you… What scared you was the thought of losing him.

You held his hand tighter as you felt your eyes begin to burn from tears forming. After years of being rejected and neglected by your own family, surrendering yourself to someone in the terms of love was just out of the question. If you were honest with yourself, there was always a void inside of you. And that void only felt filled when you were with him. Your voice slightly cracked as you spoke, “And how do you feel about that?”

He chuckled lightly, looking at your hands, “I already know how I feel about it. I need to know how you feel about it, Doctor.”

In this moment, you wanted nothing more than him. You wanted him everywhere. You needed to feel him everywhere. You knew what you needed to do, and you knew he needed it as much as you did.

You moved to straddle his lap, hands lacing through his hair. Your voice was like silk as you murmured your response to him:

“I think I would rather show you how I feel.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The crystals mentioned in the chapter are real in the SW universe, but obviously I'm making extra details up about them. You can look them up on Wookiepedia.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sex. It's all sex.

“I think I would rather show you how I feel.”

The words fell like pure honey from your lips. Ben shuddered at your response before eagerly taking your lips into his mouth. He kissed you with a fervent passion that made you lightheaded. You kissed him back, tongue tracing over his full lips. You moaned against his mouth as his hands slid down your back to firmly grasp your ass under his sweater. You had opted for some cheeky underwear just in case this happened. You felt him hardened under you and you began to grind against him.

“Fuck, Y/N…” he moaned as he leaned his head back on the couch. You kissed and licked down his neck, lightly sucking and marking him. He moved a hand to the back of your head, tightening a fist in your hair. He jerked back gently, forcing your lips back to his.

Ben wrapped his arms under your ass as he stood with you, your legs wrapping around his waist. You didn’t break the kiss as he crossed the room to his bedroom doors, propping you up against them. An invisible pull shot your hands up and above your head, the Force holding you in place and preventing you from moving them. You eyed Ben curiously and he smirked, resuming his assault on your neck. You locked your legs around his waist as his hands began to explore your body under the sweater. The fabric was so baggy and loose on you, causing it to fall every time Ben pulled it up.

He let out an annoyed huff before the fabric of the sweater completely ripped down the middle, leaving your bare breasts exposed. You stared at him in disbelief as he gave you a devilish smile. His tongue dove back into your mouth as his ungloved hands kneaded your breasts and pulled at your nipples. This was the first time he had touched them without his hands covered and the sensation was amazing. You lulled your head back against the door and arched your back as he took one of your nipples in his mouth, tongue lazily gliding over the mound before letting go with a suck and a loud pop. He did the other one the same. You could feel your pussy dripping down your ass as he pressed his hard cock against you.

“B-Ben…” you gasped. He continued to attack your breasts, taking his time. Memorizing their taste and every angle of them.

“Your tits are so fucking soft, sweetheart,” he said, wrapping his hands back under your ass as your arms fell to your sides. The doors to his bedroom flew open and he walked you in, tossing you on the bed. He slammed the door behind him as he stalked toward you. Like a man who had been parched of thirst for far too long, you knew he was about to fucking drink you up.

You pulled your arms free of the now destroyed sweater and tossed it across the room, left only in your black panties. He stood at the end of the bed, chest heaving, as if he was trying to decide what he wanted to do to you. You couldn’t take it. Going on your hands and knees, you crawled to the edge of the bed, peering up at him. His face was flushed and the bulge in his pants was dying for your attention. You sat up on your knees, grabbing the bottom of his sweater and pulling it over his head.

Holy. Fucking. Shit.

His skin was pale and adorned by multiple scars. His chest was tight and the muscles across his torso seemed to ripple and twitch under your touch. You kissed a trail from his neck, down his chest, and past his stomach to right above the hem of his pants. You swirled your tongue against the sensitive flesh, looking up at him. He looked like he would lose what little restraint he had at any given moment. Good.

You took the elastic band of his pants between your teeth, pulling them down with you as you sunk to the floor in front of him. Ben let out labored breaths as you helped him out of his pants and began pulling down his boxers, kissing along the bottom of his stomach as his cock sprung free.

The sight of his swollen cock dripping with precum made you fucking drool. You couldn’t wait to taste him, to feel him ripping your throat apart. You knew from his height his dick had to be a good size, but you didn’t expect it to be this big. You were definitely not complaining. You slowly began to palm his cock, your tongue hanging on the end of the tip, letting the precum drip into your mouth before taking him in as far as you could. His hand immediately went to the back of your head, forcing you down farther on his cock. Just what you wanted.

“That’s it…Good girl,” he praised you as you began to bob up and down on his member. “Take that fucking cock. Take it all.”

You moaned at the praise, a hand immediately shooting between your thighs to offer some needed relief to your swollen bud. But it didn’t last long. Both hands flew behind your back with the Force. Your eyes flew to his and you immediately removed your mouth from his cock.

“What the fuck?!”

He chuckled, taking your head and ramming his cock back in your mouth. “Oh no, sweetheart,” he panted as he fucked your throat, drool running out of your mouth and down your tits, “that fucking cunt is mine tonight.” He forced his cock down your throat deeper than before. If you were wet before, you were fucking drenched now. Between his words and him taking charge like that, you’re surprised you didn’t cum on the spot.

Ben pulled you to your feet, kissing you before tossing you back on the bed and quickly climbing on top of you. You immediately got very insecure. Sure, you’d fucked around with a guy or two, but you’d never had true sex. Hell, you hadn’t even been eaten out. You wanted to slap your younger self for giving head for nothing in return. Fucking stupid. You knew down deep you wanted this. You wanted him like this. You wanted him to have you in this way because you knew you’d never have anyone else ever again. Ben felt your unease and pulled up to look at you.

“What’s wrong, sweetheart?” he asked, brushing hair away from your face.

“I, uhm, I’ve…I’ve never…” you trailed off. What is wrong with you?!

He kissed your nose and pressed his forehead to yours as he spoke, “I haven’t either.”

You connected your eyes with his, still processing what he was saying. Maybe, just maybe, you really were soulmates. You were meant for this. Together. Then the thought creeped in your mind of what losing your virginity entails.

“There might be blood,” you blurted out. WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM?!

He chuckled, “Sweetheart, I know. It’s okay. We can stop if you want to. I want you to be comfortable.”

You sighed, pulling him closer to kiss him. “I don’t want to stop. I want you in every possible way. I trust you.”

He smiled. A smile so genuine and caring that it made you feel something deeper than the hot affection you were reeling with right now. Then, his eyes shifted to the nightstand. You knew what he was going for.

“I have an implant,” you said, sticking your arm out and running your hand over it. He felt it as well and breathed a sigh of relief.

“Thank fuck,” a beat, “I don’t want anything separating me from you.”

With that, he began kissing down your neck, the heat in your pussy quickly reappearing. You moaned and threaded your fingers through his hair as he kissed and licked his way down your body. He shifted down between your legs, wrapping his arms up and under your ass and over your thighs. He placed soft kisses down each of your thighs, almost to your center. You breathed heavily as his mouth hovered above your still covered sex, his hot breath beating down on the sensitive flesh. His eyes flashed to yours as he started to pull down your underwear, then stopping. You nodded, chewing your bottom lip as he revealed your sex to himself.

He tossed your panties across the room and returned between your legs, those hot breaths sending shock waves through your clit. You moaned in anticipation and your eyes rolled back in your head.

“Eyes on me, baby,” Ben breathed between your legs. Your eyes snapped to his and locked. Your mouth fell open as his tongue delved between your folds, lapping up the wetness from your aching cunt.

“Fuckkkk…” you cried, head lulling back into the pillow and back arching. You felt a sharp bite to your inner thigh and your eyes shot back to his.

“I said eyes on me,” he scolded you. Oh, fuck. You realized quickly that he was going to be the dominant one here and you were more than okay with it. You played along.

You licked your lips as you watched him continue to devour your pussy. His face glistened with your juices. Your hands went to your breasts, tweaking your nipples as you spoke.

“Yes, Supreme Leader,” you cooed.

He groaned into your cunt, the vibrations sending pulsations through your swollen clit.

“Good girl,” he said, “this pussy is mine. You’re fucking delicious.”

He continued lapping at your folds, the sheets soaking beneath you. You barely felt the finger he inserted you were so fucking wet. He started pumping his finger in and out of you, curling slightly to hit _that_ spot while he latched onto your clit.

“Oh, fuck…Yes… Right there,” you panted. You felt your orgasm building as Ben suddenly added a second finger, your walls stretching around his thick digits.

“Ben!” you squealed. You felt your orgasm nearing. He added a third finger. Holy fuck, you felt like he was going to split you in half.

“Uh, uh,” he hummed, placing another bite on your inner thigh, “call me by the right name. Be a good girl.”

“Supreme Leader… Fuck...” You were so close. His fingers plunged deep inside you, the sound of your wet cunt filled the room.

“Cum for me, baby. Cum on my fucking hand like the good girl you are.” That was all you needed to send you over the edge. Your walls clenched around his fingers and your back arched, pressing your head to the top of the bed as you screamed in pure pleasure. You were exhausted, but you knew he wasn’t done with you.

Through bleary eyes, you looked down at Ben as he sucked the juices from your demolished cunt. He crawled back over top of you, his hand hovering near your mouth.

“Open,” he said, you did. “Suck.”

You sucked your cum from his fingers, taking your time and taking his fingers all the way down your throat. He watched you intently, lust overtaking his face. His cock twitched against your thigh as you cleaned his last finger and let go with a pop.

“That’s my good girl,” he said as he sat up between your legs, rubbing his cock along your slit.

“Please…” you begged.

“Please, what?” he asked, one hand stroking his cock while the other rubbed lazy circles over your swollen clit.

“Please…Please fuck me, Supreme Leader.”

He smirked at you as he lined himself up with your entrance. You gasped at the intrusion. You sat up on your elbows as you watched his cock slowly disappear inside of you.

“Holy shit,” Ben panted, “you’re so fucking tight… Oh fuck, baby.”

Ben leaned back over top of you, wrapping a hand behind your back to support you. He let you adjust and began to move slowly once you nodded for him to. It burned at first, but it turned pleasurable.

“How does that feel?” he asked between breaths as he moved in and out of you. “Are you comfortable?”

“Ughhh… I’m more than comfortable…” your eyes fluttered and you arched your back more. You felt him through your bond and the sensation was pure bliss. It was more than lust or just sex. It was a moment in which you would never be able to replicate again. The moment the two of you became one.

Ben sped up, somehow going deeper with each thrust.

“Ben…” you moaned, wrapping your arms around his neck, hands going to his hair. You kissed his lips as he fucked you, the sound of slapping skin echoing off the tiled floors and walls in the room. Sweat dripped from his face as he fucked you, mixing with your own.

“You feel so fucking good,” he started, “I’ve wanted to get my hands all fucking over you since I found you in that god damn base… Fuck.”

He buried his cock deeper inside you. You lifted your legs to wrap around his waist, making him pound deeper inside your cunt.

“Ben! Ben, fuck, fuck, fuck,” your curses were synchronized with the feeling of him obliterating the sensitive area inside you. He watched you intently as your face contorted in different phases of pleasure and how your tits bounced every time he thrust his cock inside you. You felt like he was fucking worshipping you.

He buried his head in the crook of your neck as you tightened your grip in his hair. You were going to cum again. The feeling of him inside you was too much and it caused your legs to tremble around him. His thrusts became erratic and you knew he was close too. He sucked on your neck. Hard. You knew it would bruise. You were glad.

“Y/N…God dammit, I’m going to cum. I need you to cum again, baby. Cum with me. Cum on my fucking cock.”

A guttural scream ripped through you as your second orgasm hit, legs locking around Ben’s waist. Your cunt clenching around his cock sent him over the edge, his hot seed spilling inside of you and mixing with your own as his thrusts slowed.

You weren’t sure how long you had stayed there together, joined in that position. All you knew was you missed the sensation once Ben slipped his now softened member out of you. He laid beside you, pulling you to his chest and pulling the blankets to cover you both. You both were sticky with sweat and you could feel the mixture of cum leaking out of you. You didn’t care. You both laid there trying to catch your breath until you decided to speak.

“That was…amazing,” you breathed, hand gently kneading the scarred skin of his sculpted stomach.

He smiled down at you, “It was beyond amazing, sweetheart.”

You cuddled closer to him, slinging a leg over him. A sudden horror washed over you as what you just did replayed through your head. You had screamed so god damn loud. Oh god, those fucking Knights were guarding your quarters.

Ben laughed. Like, so fucking loud it startled you. You didn’t know what was so funny until you realized he had read your thoughts.

“I regret to inform you, sweetheart, that they did in fact hear you. They heard me too.”

Oh my god. How the fuck were you gonna live that one down?!

“Ughhhh, whyyy…” you buried your face in his chest, never wanting to be seen again.

“It’s okay,” Ben said, petting your hair, “if they say anything, just Force choke them.”

+++++++++++++

_Why is it so fucking hot? God, I’m dying._

You felt like you were burning up as your eyes fluttered open, trying to adjust to the dimly lit room. It was like a thousand fucking degrees. And you felt something really fucking heavy on your chest. As your eyes adjusted, you looked down to see a head full of raven locks moving up and down on your chest as you breathed evenly. Ben was like a damn heater and even though you were super uncomfortable and burning the hell up, you didn’t dare wake him. You wanted to keep him like this forever.

You weren’t exactly sure at what point you had fallen asleep. Ben played with you hair as you told him about different quantum theories you had worked on. You listened as he finally told you that the dice you had found in the Rebel base were a trinket from his father’s ship, which is why he responded the way he did. He seemed different now. Like he was more okay with the idea of you two being completely open with one another. The events from the previous night began to flash through your mind. Rey storming your quarters, you almost killing her. You wished you would have. Dinner with Ben and the conversation that came with it. Retelling your lifelong secret to the only man in any universe that you trusted. Ben using the word “soulmates” to describe your connection in the Force. And then…

Your face flushed.

You fucked Ben. The Supreme Leader of the galaxy. You had sex with him. Lost your virginity to him, and he lost his to you.

You placed a hand on his hair, gently running your fingers through it. It felt like pure silk. You closed your eyes and let your mind drift as you listened to his soft snores. Obviously, the connection the two of you had in the Force was intriguing, but you were more concerned with the connection you had right now. What would come of this relationship? What if…it didn’t work? Is that a thing? If you’re “soulmates” does that mean that, no matter what, you’ll be together forever? If he’s the Supreme Leader and you’re fucking the Supreme Leader, what does that make you? His concubine?

“Sweetheart,” Ben mumbled against your bare chest, startling you, “your thoughts are really fucking loud.” He lifted his head to look at you, sleep glassing over his eyes as he gave you a small grin.

“I’m sorry I woke you,” you said. Ben shifted around beside you and you rolled on your side to face him, slinging a leg over his hip and scooting closer. He wrapped an arm around your waist, and you smiled. You gently caressed his face, then tracing the scar that went down it. You frowned at the thought of him in pain. You brushed his hair from his face as he started to speak.

“It’s okay, I was going to get up in a few anyway.” He looked so perfect like this. Completely naked laying with you, hair tangled and knotted from sleep. You couldn’t help but scoot closer and press your lips to his, softly melting into him. He kissed you sweetly, like you were so delicate you could break right there in his arms. You pulled away to look at him and you swore you heard him whimper from the loss of your lips.

“So, what are we going to do today, Supreme Leader?” you asked, twirling a lock of his hair between your fingers.

He smiled, “I had thought that we would begin your training today.”

Your face lit up, “That sounds awesome! Will I get a lightsaber?”

He chuckled, “You don’t just ‘get’ a lightsaber, first of all. You have to make it. But, no. We will not be starting with that. We may move on to combat training today.”

“Fine,” you huffed. “What else?”

“What else do you want to do?”

“I’m not really sure, but I would like to spend as much time with you as possible,” you blushed.

“I think I can arrange that. How about we train and then you join me on the bridge? Maybe you could see how things run?”

“I’d like that very much,” you beamed at him. Anything to get dressed up in the endless amount of clothing Ben had so graciously gifted you. You thought about how he saw you for the first time in that dress the day before. The Knights had said that he sometimes struggled to hide his emotions, but you honestly couldn’t get a good read on him.

“Let’s just say it took a lot to restrain myself,” he said, answering your thoughts. “I could’ve fucked you right there on that bridge with everybody watching.”

You gawked at him. “Oh, really? I guess I’ll have to find another dress when we go to the bridge today,” you teased. You pecked him on the cheek and moved to get off the bed. As soon as you stood, you felt the soreness from the night before between your legs. You walked to his bathroom, slightly wincing at the pain.

The lights turned on as you entered, and you were greeted with your reflection that seemed to scream “freshly fucked.” Hickeys littered the side of your neck and faint purplish bruises and bite marks covered your breasts. You examined farther down your body and noticed the dried mix of cum and small specks of blood that coated your thighs. You spread your legs open and saw two perfect halfmoons etched into your skin where Ben had bit you. You couldn’t help but smile to yourself at the thought of how he took care of you and made you feel so good. You hoped you did the same for him.

You switched on the shower and stuck your head back out the door to look at Ben who was holding something that looked like a tablet.

“I’m going to take a shower…” you said, hoping he caught the underlying message to come join you.

You stepped into the hot water, letting it cascade down your body and closing your eyes. You must not have heard Ben enter with you until you felt two massive arms snake around your waist, pulling you back into his front. You hummed in approval as he began kissing the back of your neck, his tongue lightly swirling with the water that laid on your skin. His hands slid upward to massage your breasts, gently pulling and pinching your nipples as he continued kissing your neck. You felt his dick begin to harden against your ass as you ever so slightly began to move against him. He let out a slight moan in approval, one of his hands dipping down to your already soaking cunt.

“Somebody’s already wet for me,” he said, bringing a finger to your mouth for you to taste yourself. You eagerly took it in your mouth, wanting to please him. “Mmm, good girl.”

He spun you around to face him. He crashed his lips with yours as he roughly cupped your face. His tongue dove deep inside your mouth as your wrapped yours around it. He slid his arms down your body, grabbing your thighs and lifting you to wrap your legs around his waist. He moved you to the wall, the tile cool against your back as he continued his assault on your mouth. You felt his cock twitching and completely hard against your inner thigh as you pulled his head back to suck on his neck. He gripped your thighs harder as if to restrain himself from forcing his cock in your tight cunt right there.

You continued to bite and suck as his neck until fresh bruises appeared on him just as he had placed them on you. You grinned, satisfied at your work as you felt the tip of his cock teasing your entrance.

“I want this whole fucking ship to know that I’m the one sucking the Supreme Leader’s cock,” you said, tugging at his hair. His teeth clenched, eyes burning with lust. He was taking deep breaths to steady himself as he braced you against the shower wall, water bouncing off of both of you. You grabbed his chin and brought it to your mouth, licking and nipping at his lips. “Stop holding back, Kylo. Fucking destroy me.”

His cock rammed into you, seating himself in you to the hilt. You yelped at the intrusion, nails digging into his shoulders as he fucked you against the wall. Ben supported your weight with the Force as one hand grasped your breast while the other wrapped around your neck, lightly squeezing. God, you wanted him to wreck you.

“Is this what you want, slut?” His grip tightened around your neck, causing your pussy to flutter as he jammed his cock into the walls of your cervix. “You want me to fuck you and abuse your little cunt like the whore you are?”

“Yes!” you gasped, moving your head so that you could take two of his fingers in your mouth, sucking them as he demolished you.

“Yes, what?” he removed his fingers from your mouth, wrapping them back around your throat and he relentlessly pounded into you.

“Yes… Yes, Supreme Leader!” you shouted. You were almost there. Your orgasm was so close.

_Fuck, fuck, fuck, yes, right there, oh fuck, I’m going to—_

Ben abruptly pulled his cock from your pussy, stalling your orgasm. Your clit throbbed at how close you were to the edge and then being brought back from it. Before you could get a word out, he sat you back on your feet, spinning you around and pressing you up against the wall and he rammed his cock in you from behind.

He railed you with a pace that had your eyes rolling back in your head and drool leaking from your mouth.

“Aw, did you want to cum, slut?” he grabbed a fistful of your hair, yanking your head towards, him causing your back to arch. “Not yet…fuck.” He battered his dick in you, your ass shaking against his pelvis. You briefly thought about what if he didn’t like your curves, but that was quickly diminished as a swift crack landed against your thick ass.

You jolted forward, moaning in pain and pleasure. He pulled your head back farther to rest on his chest as he continued to fuck your pussy. You thought he would split you in two. He slipped a hand between your legs to rub circles on your clit as he continued to fuck you. Between the two sensations, you knew you wouldn’t last much longer.

“Baby,” he started, grunting as he continued moving in you, his breath hot against your ear, “I love that ass bouncing on my cock as I fuck that little pussy. I love…god damn…I love these fucking curves. You’re fucking delectable.”

“Ben!... Ben, fuck. That cock is so fucking good,” you moaned loudly as you neared your orgasm again. “Please…Please let me cum, Supreme Leader,” you begged, “please let me cum on your big fucking cock!”

You could practically feel the smirk coming from him as he nipped at your ear before speaking, “Cum for me, sweetheart.”

Your orgasm ripped through you and Ben continued to fuck you through it. You were seeing stars as you felt him pull out and spill hot cum across your ass. You leaned against the shower wall, taking deep breaths as you came down from your high. You felt Ben’s cum dripping down your ass and onto your legs as you stood upright and turned to face him. His face was flushed as he pressed a tender kiss to your lips and then your forehead.

“Come on, let’s get cleaned up,” he said as he turned you back toward the water.

Ben washed your body free from any bodily fluids and washed your hair. You had never had such a warm and caring gesture done for you before. You tried to return the favor but failed miserably due to your height difference. The two of you laughed at your struggle and then stepped out of the shower, each of you wrapping in a towel.

“Was that…too much?” Ben asked. You knew what he was talking about.

“No! I loved it,” you started, “I like when you take control like that. It’s fucking hot.” You leaned up against his bed in your towel as he dug through his dresser.

He blushed, running a hand through his wet hair as he slipped on boxers and work out clothes. “Really? You can always tell me if it’s too much. I don’t want to hurt you.”

You stood and walked over to him, kissing him gently on the lips. “Ben, I trust you. It’s not too much. I…I think I would like more. You could never hurt me.”

Something dark flashed across his features and his eyes grew distant. You cupped his cheek and it seemed to bring him back to you. You realized that he seemed so broken, that something was missing. You were the same way and had always felt like something was missing from you too. It wasn’t until you met Ben that you actually felt whole. You hoped he felt the same.

“I’m going to get dressed for training,” you said as you walked toward the door to head to your room. “I’ll just be a little bit.”

“Okay,” he smiled at you as you turned to leave.

“And Doctor?” you stopped in the doorway, turning to him, “I feel the same way.”


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We learn some more about the true nature of Space Prince, Hux is an arrogant ass, and we have a visitor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And finally, Chapter 8! SO sorry it took so fucking long to update. This week has been hella insane and to be honest, I rewrote this chapter a zillion times. Thanks to everybody for all the kudos, bookmarks, and subscriptions! Your support means the world to me!

The door to the training room flew open and you were shocked to find all six Knights inside, unmasked, and training. Just your luck, your eyes connect with Vircul’s who was returning a set of weights to a rack.

“Hey, Princess!” he bellowed, waving, causing the other Knights to snap their heads in your direction. At the sight of Ben, they all bowed to one knee, eliciting a stern “Master Ren” before continuing with their training.

“Hey, Vicrul,” you said, waving back and following Ben through the training room. You eyed the rest of the Knights as you followed Ben to the double doors at the back of the training room. You tried to remember the names Ap’lek had said previously, but you failed miserably. The two of you entered Ben’s private training facility, the doors closing softly behind you. The room was dark, only illuminated by the stars outside the bay window. It was peaceful.

“Princess?” Ben’s voice snapped you out of your trance as you stared out the window. He sounded pissed.

“Huh?” you questioned him.

“Vicrul called you ‘Princess’…” he cocked an eyebrow at you.

“Oh…” you huffed, “I’m not really sure why he calls me that. He has since I spent the day with them.”

Ben’s lips pulled into a tight line. He almost looked jealous. He didn’t speak as he moved to the side of the room to bring two mats to sit in front of the window, placing them on the ground. Apparently, Vicrul’s pet name for you got under his skin. Ben sat with legs crossed on one of the mats and motioned for you to join him on the opposite one. You sat and eyed him.

“Ben? Is something wrong?”

He didn’t respond.

“Ben…” you reached out and took his hand.

“He has feelings for you.”

You laughed. Like, really loud. So loud those fucking Knights probably heard you. Vicrul has “feelings” for you. God damn ridiculous. You could not stand that asshole. He reminded you of Mason more than anybody else, which made you dislike him even more.

“What’s so funny?” Ben asked, arms crossing over his chest.

“Oh, my dear Supreme Leader,” you said, still laughing, “as if I could ever care for that fucktard in that way. He’s annoying as shit.”

“So, you are unbothered by his feelings toward you?” Why is he so fucking serious all the time?

“Yes, I am unbothered. I literally do not care.”

“Good,” he gave you a curt nod.

“Ben, you really cannot be that bothered by his stupid pet name for me.”

His features grew dark with possession as he spoke, “Yes, sweetheart, that stupid fucking pet name can bother me. Especially since you’re nobody’s pet…” he trailed off.

“Nobody’s pet…except your own?” you finished his sentence, eyes glazing over with desire.

His jaw clenched, “Careful, sweetheart. I don’t think you’re ready for that side of me. I’ve gone fairly easy on you.”

You crawled toward him, your face inches from his as you spoke, “Stop holding back, Master Ren.”

Ben grabbed the back of your neck, slamming your lips against his. He kissed you roughly before pulling away, pressing his forehead to yours with his eyes closed. He took deep breaths through flared nostrils as he relaxed his grip on your neck. You couldn’t help but wonder why he was holding back. You wanted him like that. Was he that scared of hurting you?

His eyes remained closed as his breathing returned to normal, “Yes, I’m that afraid of hurting you. Even though it would be in pleasure for me, I worry for you.”

You sat back on the mat, eyeing him curiously. What could he possibly want to do to you that scares him that bad?

He sighed, “Please, Y/N. Don’t push me. You see more of the Ben Solo side of me than the Kylo Ren side. I’m gentler with you. To the known galaxy, I am not a nice man. To them, I’m a monster and I know I am. I’ve killed countless people. Literal planets have been destroyed at the hands of the First Order. I’ve slaughtered men, women, children…with no remorse. There are things I don’t let you see about me. Things I wish I could undo…”

You furrowed your brows as you reached for his hand again. He let you take it. Again, you saw how broken he was—how lonely he was. You ached deep inside to be able to fill that void for him, to show him he will never be alone again. You thought about how he had told you about your bond. You are two that are one. Deep down, he was scared of losing you at his own hand. As far as being a murderer is concerned, it did bother you, but not enough to scare you away. Killing without purpose is wrong and from what little you knew about the First Order, you figured out that they probably never actually compromised on anything. They just took whatever they wanted. Maybe, just maybe, by standing with him, you could change that for the better.

“Ben, Kylo…it doesn’t matter to me. I want to know you in both ways. I want to know you as a partner and as a ruler. I want to see the softer side of you and the side that the Knights and the rest of the First Order sees. They told me you used to wear a mask as well, but you,” you cupped his face, making him look at you, “you never have to hide behind one around me. Literally or figuratively. You aren’t going to get rid of me that easily.” You gave him a small smile and he leaned into your hand.

“You’re too good to me, Doctor. I don’t deserve your affection.”

You rolled your eyes and playfully patted his face, “Well, listen here asshole, you’re getting my affection regardless of what you think. Now, are we going to train or what?”

He lightly chuckled, running a hand through his hair. “Yes, we are going to train.”

You smiled enthusiastically, tucking stray piece of hair behind your ear.

“First, we need to discuss the Force. What do you think the Force is?”

“Uhm…” you really had no fucking clue. “It’s like a cooler word for magic.”

He chuckled, “You are so damn wrong, baby.” You blushed at the term of endearment he had called you. “The Force is an energy field that moves, surrounds, and connects every living thing. Some of us, like you and I or the Knights of Ren, are able to manipulate the Force, categorizing us as being Force-sensitive.”

You sat forward, listening intently as he continued, “Being Force-sensitive means that you are born with a concentrated number of midi-chlorians in your blood. Midi-chlorians are extremely small lifeforms that host that Force connection. It’s basically a symbiotic relationship. They feed off of you while you use them to harness and manipulate the Force.”

 _So basically, I have a fucking parasite…_ you thought, slightly amused.

“If you concentrate enough, you can feel the Force weaving around you. Close your eyes and rest your palms on the mat beside you. Take slow, deep breaths and clear your mind.”

You did as he instructed. You cleared your mind and imagined that you were floating in the vastness of space. You envisioned darkness surrounding you and engulfing you. You breathed evenly as you relaxed your shoulders.

“Good,” Ben said, “now tell me what you feel.”

You concentrated as you felt the Force surround you. You could sense Ben and the Knights nearby as well as faint sensations from crew members on board. Then, something else…

“I feel you and the Knights. I feel the crew,” you spoke with eyes closed, “but I feel something else.”

You heard Ben scoot towards you, “What is it?”

You chased the feeling through the Force. It was resonating nearby. It felt as though it was sending vibrations down your back—as if it was beckoning you forward. You pushed harder, feeling sweat drip down your temple.

“Y/N?” you heard Ben ask in the distance. You ignored him, still trying to pinpoint what was calling you. Your face and chest were drenched with sweat, soaking into your sports bra and black tank top.

“Y/N!” Ben yelled.

Your eyes snapped open at the sound of alarm in his voice. You looked around and saw Ben…below you. You were hovering in the air, legs still crossed. Your ears began ringing as you were gently lowered to the ground.

“Are you okay?” he asked, bringing your face between his hands. “Your eyes are white again, Doctor.”

He removed his hands as you closed your eyes, massaging small circles into your temples. What the fuck was that?

“That was so strange,” you said, bringing your eyes to meet his. “Are they still white?”

“No, it’s faded now. What did you see?”

“I didn’t really see anything, it was more like a feeling. It felt like I was being pulled by a magnet or something. Like it was calling to me,” you said, completely ignorant to whatever the fuck just happened.

“Hmm.” A beat. “Maybe we can pinpoint the cause of it soon as you get stronger in the Force. I don’t want you to hurt yourself. It is strange though—I didn’t feel any disturbance.”

You sighed, “So, what now?”

“Now, we are going to work on intruding on someone’s mind. It is different than you and I simply reading each other’s thoughts. It’s a forceful act that can inflict pain if resisted and on those weak minded.” You listened as he continued, “I haven’t done this to you just for the fact I care enough to not invade your privacy.”

 _Geez, thanks for that,_ you thought. Ben rolled his eyes.

“I want you to imagine a wall inside your mind. You will feel me push against your mind. It might be uncomfortable, so please tell me if you are in pain at any point. Think of a color and hide it behind that wall. Do not let me find out,” he said, readjusting in front of you.

You thought of your color and envisioned a brick wall building brick by brick in your mind. Ben reached out his hand to the side of your head and you felt a small pressure.

“The color is red,” he said.

“Well, I fucking suck at this,” you said, crossing your arms.

“You just need to practice is all. Try again.”

You huffed and chose a different color. You built your wall. You felt the pressure again and pushed back toward it.

“Yellow, but you’re getting stronger. Again.”

You literally went through every color you could fucking imagine and some numbers as well. You were getting sick of him constantly being able to find your thoughts.

“What’s the point if it’s not getting any better? Obviously, I’m not doing something right.”

Ben chuckled, “You are so impatient. Here. Let’s try one more time and we will move on.”

“Ughhhh. Fine.”

You chose your number. You built your wall. You felt the pressure. You pushed back and you felt him push further. After failing and failing over and over again, you were getting angry that you could not even come close to accomplishing the task. You pushed back again. Anger festered inside of you as you thought about Ben finding that god damn number. He pushed further, the small pressure turning into a pounding ache at the back of your mind. Your breathing became labored as your eyes were locked onto his. His perfect features pulled into a grimace when you pushed back even more against him. You wouldn’t let him win. Not this time. By channeling all the anger that was building inside of you, you pushed back one final blow with any energy you had left.

At that moment, it was like reality had snapped. You felt like you were flying through space as different images flashed past your face. Reality slapped you in the face when you grasped that the images you were seeing were of Ben:

_A boy with raven hair clings to a woman with brown braids and a white gown as a ship flies away. The little boy screams for his father to come back._

_The boy is left in the care of a large bear-like creature with brown fur and a sash with what looks like weapons on it._

_The boy, now a teenager, is sent away to another man with graying hair and brown robes._

_The teenager excels faster than his peers. His peers torment him for his family’s heritage. His anger grows and he hears a voice—a voice that would become his master._

_The teenager, now a man, is surrounded by fire. A temple burns. People are screaming._

_The man faces a gray-haired man. He kills him, red light illuminating the darkness around them._

_The man grieves behind a mask as he is interrogated by his master. The mask then lays in pieces in the lift._

_The man sees a woman on a different ship. He tries to kill her. He can’t._

_The man connects with a girl—Rey. He feels at peace._

_The man kills his master._

_The man finds you. He feels love._

The images were ripped from your view as you were flung across the room, slamming into the wall.

“Get. Out. Of. My. Head.” Ben enunciated each word with every slam of his lightsaber into the wall across from you. The metal screeched as the laser ripped through it, molten bits flying in every direction. You crawled back into the corner, tears streaming down your face as you watched his rampage. Pure rage poured from his very being.

“Ben…” you all but whispered, voice catching as you tried to control the breakdown you felt coming. You hadn’t meant to do this, to cause him so much anger. He continued his onslaught to the wall, screaming and cursing your very existence. This man…he was so much different than the one you had just been training with.

“Ben,” you said a little more firmly getting to your feet. You hugged your torso as you made cautious steps toward him. He heaved the weapon over his head.

“Kylo!” you yelled, reaching for his arm as he raised it again. He whipped around, hand flying up to freeze you in place. His eyes had gone completely black from anger. The weapon still ignited at his side buzzed in the thickening silence. His eyes searched yours as you tried to speak, but an invisible hand wrapped around your neck prevented you from doing so. Tears streamed down your face as you clawed for breaths, begging in your mind for him to release you.

_Ben! Please…I can’t breathe…Don’t kill me…I’m sorry…_

You fell to the ground with a hard thud as he released his force from you. You held your throat trying to massage some of the pain away. Wiping tears from your face, you looked up at him as he towered over you.

“I’m sorry,” your voice hoarse, “I didn’t mean to do that.”

He didn’t respond, still staring at you, weapon ignited.

“You almost fucking killed me, Ben. I didn’t mean to do that. Fuck, I don’t even know what I did.”

His jaw clenched, his hand tightening on the weapon. His silence angered you more than anything. You got to your feet and bore into him.

“You know what, fuck. Forget it, Ben. Be angry, I don’t give a fuck. I’m not dealing with this. I wasn’t trying to hurt you.” You turned to leave and heard his lightsaber deactivate behind you.

“Y/N, wait…” you heard him as you flung the double doors open, gaining the attention of all the Knights. You didn’t wait. Vicrul grinned at you as you moved through the facility.

“Hey, Vicrul? Will you escort me back to my quarters?”

+++++++++++++

You weren’t sure if Ben came back to your quarters to get dressed for the day. If he did, he didn’t make his presence known. After Vicrul brought you back, you told him he could just wait in the living area while you got ready. Sure, Ben had pissed you off, but you were still going to go by the itinerary that you had laid out for the day. You did, however, want to make him feel like pure shit, which was why you chose your current outfit. You basically asked yourself, “How can I make the Supreme Leader as uncomfortable as possible?”

You ended up choosing a red silk gown. It was skin-tight in a mermaid shape with a deep v-neck cut. The straps were thin and the back dipped down to right above your ass. The fabric rippled as it constricted against your curvy frame. You added some heels, makeup, and lightly curled your hair. You reached out through the Force and, indeed, found Ben. He was on the bridge, right where he was supposed to be. You exited your room and immediately felt Vicrul’s repulsive stare rake over you. To be honest, asking Vicrul to escort you back was just another way to piss Ben off.

“Miss Ren,” Vicrul said, standing and replacing his mask.

“We’re going to pay the Supreme Leader a visit,” you said, as he held the doors for you and followed you down the hallway.

You weaved down the various corridors with ease. Stormtroopers and personnel crowded the sides of the hallways as you and the Knight passed by. You felt powerful and it felt good. You reached the hatch to the bridge and it flew open. Your heels clicked with pride as you stormed in leaving Vicrul behind to guard the door. You saw Ben before he saw you and for that you were grateful. You had almost made it to him when your path was intercepted by none other than General Hux.

“Doctor,” he started, as he eyed you up and down, “you look well. It is an honor for you to join us. I must say, what brings you here?”

You smirked, “I was here to see Kylo.” Ben’s head turned in your direction. You could feel the disdain towards Hux through your bond. “But thank you for such a warm welcome, General. It is good to see you again.” You offered him a smile, obviously feeding his ego. You knew it was tearing Ben up inside.

Hux grinned and stuck an arm out, offering to escort you through the bridge. You took it and silently laughed at the thought of Ben completely ripping his head off for even touching you. You held Hux’s arm as he led you around the bridge, ranting about who knows what. Your mind was focused on Ben’s through your bond. You knew he was watching every move you made. You knew it was tearing him apart.

“How does that sound to you, Doctor?” Hux asked, snapping you back to the present moment.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t quite catch that, General Hux,” you offered him a small smile. He returned it.

“Please, call me Armitage,” he patted your hand that was linked with his arm. “I asked if you would like to join me for dinner one night. I’d love to escort you down to Canto Bight for an evening.”

Before you could respond, Ben appeared before you. His immediate presence startled you, causing you to jerk your arm away from Hux. He was absolutely seething with rage. He bore into you as he spoke to Hux.

“General, that is unnecessary. Y/N is to only be escorted by myself or the Knights. I would hate for one of your incompetent soldiers to become distracted.”

Hux’s face turned beet red as he stormed to the opposite side of the command deck. You stared back at Ben, taking deep breaths that made your tight dress constrict around your breasts. You knew he would notice.

“Supreme Leader…” you cooed.

Ben didn’t respond. He roughly grabbed your upper arm and led you from the bridge. You gathered your dress in your free hand, practically running to keep up with him as he stormed down the halls. His grip on your arm tightened as the two of you made your way back toward your quarters. With both of you away from the room, the Knights had been dismissed. The double doors flew open and as they did, Ben launched you into the room, landing you on the couch. Your breath was knocked out of you as you tried to sit up to face Ben.

“What the fu—” you started before he cut you off.

“What the fuck was that about?!” he bellowed as he slammed the doors behind him. “I will not be made a fool of in front of that god damned General.”

“What are you talking about, Ben?” you asked, getting to your feet.

He crossed the room in three strides as he towered over you. “You know what I’m talking about, Y/N. Don’t be so fucking ignorant. What do you plan to accomplish by toying with Hux? Do you have any idea how difficult it was to not kill him right there for even thinking he could take you away like that? I heard his fucking thoughts as he practically drooled over your appearance. And then you left earlier with Vicrul—alone at that—after I had just told you about his intentions.”

 _Oh, he’s like pissed pissed…_ you thought. You knew what you wanted out of him. You had to push him farther.

“Well, I apologize, Supreme Leader if I have displeased you. I would hate to inconvenience you, especially after your episode from earlier.” You rolled your eyes and crossed your arms over your chest.

His jaw clenched as he eyed you. His leather gloves squeaked as he balled his fists. He spoke through gritted teeth, “You have no idea about those things you saw. You have no idea how much it inconvenienced me, Doctor.”

“Apparently not. Instead of explaining to me—considering I have no idea what I did—you decided to react like a fucking child. I would think the Supreme Leader of the galaxy could better control his adolescent temper.” You went on your tip toes, nose to nose, spitting the last words in his face. 

You slammed into the bay window, sharp pain shooting from the back of your head as you were held in place by the Force. Ben stalked toward you, his hand outstretched as you felt your throat constricting. You should’ve been afraid, but the pressure around your neck immediately made your cunt dripping wet. Ben wrapped his hand around your neck, increasing the hold, his nose to yours as he spoke.

“Doctor, I can assure you that any temper issue I may have is far from being adolescent in nature.” A beat. “You would do well to not speak to me with such disrespect again.”

“Fuck. You.” you choked out the words, spit forming at the corners of your mouth as your airway was cut off.

“There’s that damn filthy mouth again,” he spat as he shoved you to the ground, “I might as well make use of it.”

You gaped at him as he freed his length from his pants. His cock was red and angry from the previous torture you had given him. Before you could speak, Ben rammed his cock down your throat. You gagged around his thick member as he seated your mouth at the hilt. You clawed at his legs trying to push back to breath, but he held you in place by your head as he ripped into your throat. Tears fell from your eyes and pools of saliva fell onto your silk gown as you choked on his cock. His assault on your mouth and throat made your clit fucking throb. You began to snake a hand up under your dress as Ben removed his cock from your mouth and landed a solid slap against your cheek.

You stared at him in awe and he stroked himself. He had just slapped you.

“If you touch that fucking pussy at all, I’ll do much worse,” he said as he pumped his gloved hand up and down his length. “Do you understand?” Precum dripped onto the silk of your gown, darkening pieces of the fabric as you looked up at him.

“Yes.”

 _Crack._ Another slap.

“Yes, what?”

Your hand rubbed your reddened cheek, smearing tears and mascara across it as you spoke, “Yes, Supreme Leader.”

“Good girl.”

You opened as he shoved his cock back into your mouth. He continued to fuck your throat as he held your hair tightly against your head.

“This mouth is mine. This filthy fucking mouth is mine. I fucking own you, sweetheart.” You moaned around his cock and moved onto your knees as you took over. You wrapped your hand around his thick, veined member as you sucked him off, drool falling from your mouth and coating your dress and the floor. You continued to jack him off as you moved lower, sucking his balls and pulling back, releasing them both with a loud pop. He moaned loudly in response, his head falling back. You started bobbing up and down in sync with your hand as you felt his cock twitching inside your mouth. You knew he was close.

“Fuck, baby. Suck my god damn cock,” he panted in between moans.

“Yes, Supreme Leader,” you murmured, wrapping your tongue around the tip. You moved faster before fully taking him in again. Hot seed hit the back of your throat as you sucked cum from his pulsating cock. You lapped it up, cleaning up and down his shaft making sure to not miss a drop before you swallowed his load. He stepped back, returning his softened dick back to his pants as he held out a hand to help you from the floor. You took it, standing to face him.

He didn’t speak as he pulled you against his chest, arms encircling your waist. You sighed at the sensation, wrapping your arms around his neck and threading your fingers through his dark hair. You heard his heartbeat as you laid your head against his chest. The sound of his heartbeat along with the calming rising and falling of his chest felt like home.

You felt his concern and sadness through your bond as you pulled back to look at him.

“Ben?” you whispered, his eyes locked on yours.

“It’s okay,” you said. “You didn’t hurt me.”

“But I did,” he replied, his hand moving to cup your cheek he had previously slapped.

You took his hand in your own, “No, you didn’t. Well, I mean yes, it hurt. A lot. But it hurt in the good way. Like, making me horny as fuck way.” You blushed at your explanation.

He sighed, removing his gloves and running a hand through his hair. He didn’t speak as he led you away from the living area to his room to sit on the bed. You sat there confused as he disappeared into the bathroom, hearing running water beginning to fill the bath. He returned to you as you stood. He gently faced you away from him to undo the zipper on the back of your dress which pooled around your feet, leaving you only in a red silk thong. You crossed your arms over your chest as the cold air grazed your nipples. Ben placed a soft kiss to your forehead as he pulled down your underwear, leaving you completely nude. He scooped you up into his arms before carrying you into the bathroom, submerging you fully in the warm water. You sighed at the feeling, resting your head on the back of the tub as Ben added some kind of bubble bath to the water, causing it to foam.

As you were relaxing against the bathtub, slowly drifting into a trance, you heard the sound of clothes hitting the floor. You looked over to see Ben undressing and walking towards the tub. He seated himself in the water across from you, face covered with concern. You moved toward him, placing a kiss against his full lips. He kissed you back gently, as if you were totally breakable. Reaching around him, he wet a washcloth and began cleaning your face free of melted makeup and dried saliva. Your mind was moving a million miles a minute as he took care of you. He reached around him again, returning with a small tub of ointment.

“This is bacta,” he explained. “It will heal the bruising fairly quickly.” He applied a layer to your sore cheek. It tingled and it was weird, you could feel it working.

“Turn around,” he murmured. You did as he asked, turning to face away from him. “Lean back.” You did, fully submerging your head in the water until he pulled you to sit back up. You heard him lather shampoo in his hands before applying it to your hair, massaging your scalp, making you moan in contentment. He rinsed your hair repeated the ritual with conditioner.

You couldn’t fucking believe it. The Supreme Leader of the fucking galaxy—your Space Prince—was washing your hair. Ben chuckled softly, definitely hearing you refer to him as a Space Prince in your thoughts.

“It’s funny,” he said, “my mother was the Princess of Alderaan at one point.”

The words left your mouth before you could stop them, “Do you ever miss her?”

Ben stilled at your question, hands tensing on your shoulders he was massaging. You turned to look at him, straddling his lap. The water in the tub gently sloshed up on his sculpted chest, causing it to glisten in the dimly lit bathroom.

“I’m sorry,” you started, “you don’t have to answer that. It’s not my place to meddle in your life. Especially touchy subjects. I know all about that.” You rubbed the back of his neck and threaded your fingers through his hair. He still didn’t speak, so you placed small kisses all over his face, eventually returning to his lips. He kissed you hard, tongue tracing your lips and begging for entrance. You opened for him, tongues swirling around each other as you felt him harden between your legs. You knew you were still wet from him fucking your throat, so you reached between your bodies, lining him up with your entrance as you slid down on his cock, seating yourself completely at the hilt.

You lulled your head to the side, eyes closed, as you moaned his name, slowly grinding against him. Ben began to suck on the side of your neck, hands snaking around to grasp your ass under the water. His hands moved with your hips, grinding against his body as you rode his cock. You quickened your pace, hands flying to pull at Ben’s hair, water falling outside the tub. The two of you panted against one another, murmuring each other’s names into wet skin. You both reached your orgasm at the same time, Ben spilling inside of you. The two of you stayed joined, laid against each other until the water started to cool.

“We need to get out, sweetheart,” Ben said, pushing hair away from your face and kissing your temple. You nodded in agreement, regretfully separating yourself from him as he helped you step out of the tub. You both dried off in silence and you couldn’t help but think what was going through is mind. You wrapped a towel around your torso as you walked into his closet, grabbing one of his sweaters from the dresser for yourself and a pair of boxers for him. After dressing, you laid in the bed, Ben pulling you close to his chest. He held you like he was going to lose you. Like you would disappear at any minute.

“There are not many things in the galaxy that scare me, Y/N. But the one thing I am most afraid of is losing you.” Ben spoke with a sincerity that shocked you as you sat up on an elbow to look at him. Tears pricked your eyes as you realized how much he actually cared about you.

You cupped his cheek as you spoke, “I’m not going anywhere _,_ Ben _._ Regardless of who you want to be. I care for you so much—more than I thought I could for anybody if I’m honest,” you gulped before continuing, not knowing how he would respond to your next statement. “And what happened earlier that—that was _good._ I-I like when you take charge. When you’re dominant with me. I like watching you be the Supreme Leader. It does something to me I can’t explain. I trust you, completely. You will never truly harm me.”

He opened his mouth to speak but you continued, “I pushed you on purpose. I wanted that from you. Sure, I might have been somewhat upset at the time, but I did push you. You have a temper and to be really fucking honest, it’s kinda hot.”

He smirked at your confession, a light blush forming across his pale cheeks.

“Okay,” he said, “but if I ever hurt you more than what you want, I… I don’t think I could live with myself. You’re too important.”

You smiled, “We just have to get used to one another. We’ve got all the time in the galaxy, remember?”

He kissed your forehead, pulling you back against his chest and lifting the blanket to cover you both. He dimmed the lights with a wave of his hand as he spoke two simple words:

“I know.”

+++++++++++++

_You were dreaming again. The same grassy field. The same waterfall that cast a rainbow in the mist. You sighed at the peace that surrounded you. Glancing down, you noticed you were in a gray dress this time. The bodice was made with gray silk that hung deep off your shoulders. The bottom half was adorned in flowing, ruffling layers of tulle that danced in the light breeze of the wind. Your hair fell straight down your back, grazing across your shoulders as the wind whipped against you. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw that small head of raven locks running across the pasture. You turned to follow the child before he dissipated into the air._

_You stood, confused. That had never happened before. You walked toward the water when you felt a presence behind you._

_“Ben…” you said turning to face him. Except, that wasn’t Ben._

_He favored Ben in many ways. He had longer, wavy hair, but it was brown instead of black. He also had a scar across the side of his face. He wore brown and black robes and the hilt of a lightsaber hung at his side._

_“Who are you?” you asked, cautiously taking a couple steps back._

_“Please,” he started, “you have no reason to be afraid.”_

_You eyed him and moved closer. He was attractive, but nowhere near Ben’s level._

_“Who are you?” you asked again, crossing your arms._

_“Who I am does not matter right now. I come bearing a message for you. If you would walk with me.” He extended an arm for you to take. You stared at it for a moment before looping your arm through his as he led you along the side of the water._

_“There has been a disturbance in the Force. An awakening. Something is coming,” he spoke with caution as he led you to a stone bench near the edge of the water, seating you both._

_“Secrets and lies that have been hidden for years within Ben Solo’s family are about to come to pass. It is of upmost importance that the two of you find balance within the Force. You are a dyad—two that are one. Only together do you have the strength to face the danger that is looming.”_

_You were so fucking confused. “What do you mean? What are you talking about?”_

_“There is an island with secrets that lie beneath. There is a way to achieve true balance in the Force. One that allows you to carry both the power of the Light and the Dark. You must go there. You’ve felt the awakening. It has called you, hasn’t it?” he asked._

_You thought for a second to the feeling you felt when you were meditating with Ben. It felt like vibrations hitting your very soul, but you could never pinpoint the origin._

_“Yes,” you said, looking out over the water before returning your gaze to him, “but I am not sure what I felt. It just felt like something was calling me.”_

_“Indeed, it is,” he agreed, removing his lightsaber from his waist, the silver shining in the sun. “Powerful Light, powerful Dark. By combining the two, balance is achieved. A lightsaber can be a very mighty weapon for a Force user. Its construction is rigorous and is an extension of one’s very soul. The crystals used to make them call to us. They seek us. Your awakening has come, but so has something else.”_

_You looked down at your hands as you tried to process what he was saying. The crystals call to you? There are only two crystals on the entire Finalizer that you knew of, so that would mean… You looked back in his direction as the realization dawned on you, but he was gone, leaving you alone on the bench._

_You stood abruptly as you heard shifting through the grass behind you. Turning to face it, you saw a dark figure moving toward you quickly, a weapon raised over their head as if to strike. You took steps back, forgetting how close you were to the water, before tumbling down, down, down…_

You woke with a start, panting heavily and sweat soaking your hair and Ben’s sweater. You sat up, physically shaken from the encounter in your dream. Your movements caused Ben to wake as well. He rubbed his eyes as he sat up to face you.

“Sweetheart? Are you okay? What’s wrong?”

“You remember in the training facility… How something was calling me?” you asked, he nodded. “I think I know what it was.”


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's just a lot. TW - character death

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's ya girl. I've been busy as fuck and am so sorry this shit took forever. Hope you enjoy! Also don't hate me.

Ben was still trying to wake up as you frantically drug him down the hallway and placed his hand on the scanner. The door opened and you felt it. Leaving him in the doorway, you walked over to the console on the wall where the crystals called to you from behind it. It felt like heat was radiating from them as you placed your hand against the steel.

“Open it,” you said, feeling Ben approach behind you. He punched in the code and the container came into view. As you reached toward it, it disintegrated, the crystals hovering in the air in front of you. Ben stepped beside you, completely in awe of what was happening. The crystals slowly circled one another, the red and yellow of each one pulsating dimly with light.

“Do you hear that…” you practically whispered as your fingertips danced around the crystals as they continued their charade.

“Hear what?” he asked, resting a hand at the small of your back. He watched intently as the light from the crystals flickered in your eyes.

“It’s like they’re singing…” you gently touched one of the crystals as a series of images flashed before your eyes.

_A raven-haired child running through a grassy field. He looks like Ben, but it’s not him. The child runs to the edge of the cliff before falling over._

_An island surrounded by cerulean blue seas. Stone structures cover the surface, but there’s something deeper, hidden beneath the island. Something not seen for centuries._

_A graying woman looks out over a camp. She holds a small doll resembling a pilot. She clutches it to her chest as tears fall from her eyes._

_You see yourself standing with your back to Ben’s. You both hold lightsabers that illuminate a bright white as darkness surrounds you. A dark figure stalks toward you, multiplying into other figures. Red blades ignite around you._

+++++++++++++

Your eyes fluttered open as they adjusted to the bright white that surrounded you. You shifted uncomfortably, as if you hadn’t moved in days. As your eyes adjusted, you began to take in your environment. Medical equipment framed either side of the white linens on the hospital bed. To your immediate left, Ben was in a chair beside your bed, his head resting on your thigh while his hand held yours. He was softly snoring. You lightly grazed your thumb across his knuckles, causing him to wake.

“Y/N,” he sighed, “thank the Force. I was so worried about you.” He placed tender kisses on the palm of your hand.

“Ben…What happened?” You asked trying to sit up. You were sore, but the pain was manageable. You looked down to see your clothes had been replaced with a hospital gown. Ben was dressed in his full Supreme Leader attire.

“What do you remember?”

You thought for a moment. “I remember the crystals calling me. They were floating and flashing light. I said that it sounded like they were singing. I remember touching one of them and a bunch of images flying through my mind. After that…It’s just blank.”

He nodded, scooting his chair closer to you. “You were levitating, and your eyes had glazed over white again. I’m not sure what you saw, but we need to investigate it further. I reached out to touch you and, as I did, you collapsed onto me. You’ve been out for two days, sweetheart.”

Wait, what? Two days? Two fucking days?

You gaped at him, “Two days? What did I miss?”

He laughed, “So, you’ve been unconscious for two days at the hands of who knows what, and the most you’re concerned about is what you missed on the ship?”

You blushed, pursing your lips. “Well, I mean I am concerned, but I know what I saw.” You paused. “Ben, I saw—”

You were interrupted by a frantic knock at the door. Ben pulled away from you to answer it, revealing Hux and two Stormtroopers on the other side.

“Supreme Leader, I do apologize for the intrusion,” Hux started.

“That’s never stopped you before,” Ben said. You lightly giggled under your breath, Ben quickly looking back at you to give you a small smile and wink. Hux continued as Ben replaced his gloves.

“Ren, we’ve found the Resistance pilot. He’s being held in Interrogation Room . He isn’t budging and won’t give us the information on the location of the base.”

“I see,” he paused, “I will meet you down there in ten minutes.” Ben shut the door before Hux could respond. He returned to your side, pressing a tender kiss to your lips. His full mouth was hot against your own and you wanted to drink him up.

“I’m going to have to go and extract the information. I will send a couple of the Knights to escort you back to our quarters once you are discharged, which should be fairly soon.”

You groaned at the thought of being away from him. Obviously, the last time the two of you were apart it did not go well. What could possibly happen this time.

“Fine,” you pouted, pulling him back down into another kiss, “but when you get back, we have a lot of things to discuss.” You let your hand trail down the side of his neck, across his chest and stomach, to rest just above his waist, lightly massaging the area.

Ben moaned against your mouth, “Y/N… Please be a good girl for your Supreme Leader.” And with that, he left the room, cape billowing behind him.

You sat back against the bed and impatiently awaited your discharge. You felt two presences appear outside the room, so you knew the Knights had showed up. Thinking back to your encounter with the man in the dream and what you experienced with the crystals, you had so much to tell Ben. You really had no fucking clue what any of it meant. The man said something about lies in Ben’s family? What did that mean? Also, who the fuck was he?

A small knock at the door caught your attention and a short, petite woman dressed in all white entered the room.

“Hello, Miss. I am Nurse-293. I’m here for your discharge paperwork if you are ready to get started.” She gave you a wide smile as you nodded for her to continue.

“Now, just looking over your lab results, you really don’t have anything out of the ordinary. However, I did notice some things upon your physical exam that did raise concerns.”

You sat up straighter, curious as to what she was talking about. “And what was that?”

She moved closer, lowering her voice. “Well, I found many bruises as well as what looked to be bite marks on your body. I just wanted to ensure that anything you have been doing is completely consensual.”

You stifled a laugh. She was clearly concerned. “Nurse, I can assure you that I am completely fine.”

She let out a sigh of relief, “Thank goodness. Okay, well,” she said as she thumbed through her notes, “my only other request is that we upgrade your implant in your arm. That way we are familiar with the device and are able to easily remove it if need be.”

You shrugged, not really caring one way or the other. Although you couldn’t think as to why it would need to be removed.

“That’s fine,” you said.

“Perfect! I will have a medical droid swing by your quarters to issue the replacement.” She scanned her clipboard. “Uhm, where are your quarters? I do not see it listed.”

You blushed, “It’s Be—the _Supreme Leader’s_ quarters.” You quickly corrected yourself.

Her eyes grew wide, “Oh. I see. Yes, well. I will make sure it is a droid.”

You wanted to laugh at her realization of you fucking the Supreme Leader, and the fact that he had left all those markings.

“Is that all, Nurse?” That sounded way harsher than you intended.

“Uhm, yes, I apologize. The Supreme Leader is exceptionally private, so it is strange to see someone so close to him.” You bit back a smile. “But, you are all cleared! I believe the Knights outside are here for your discharge.”

“Great!” you jumped up, forgetting you were just in hospital gown. “Do I have clothes?”

“I—”

Nurse-293 was cut short by Ap’lek opening the door, a small bag in his hand.

“I apologize for the intrusion, Miss Ren. Master Ren had prepared this for you. We will be ready when you are.” The mask distorted his voice as he stuck his hand through the door, offering you the bag.

You clutched the hospital gown around you as you grabbed the bag from him, giving a small nod in thanks.

“Well, I guess that settles it! The medical droid will be by later this evening. Please let us know if we can be of further assistance, _Miss Ren_.” Wait, why did she say it like that? Oh, well. She left and you got dressed.

The outfit Ben had put together was actually really cute and totally reminded you of something he would wear. You did, however, notice that the black bra and underwear Ben had supplied you were definitely see-through and basically made of strings. You wore a long-sleeve black knit tunic that hung to your calves but had slits on either side all the way up to your bra band. Underneath, you donned black leather leggings and finished the outfit with heeled black booties. Ben also graciously packed your hairbrush, which you used quickly, parting your hair to the side and returning it to the bag. You opened the door to find Ap’lek and a Knight you didn’t recognize waiting on you. Thank god Vicrul wasn’t there because you were not in the mood.

“Miss Ren,” Ap’lek said, giving you a small bow, “This is Ushar. He will be accompanying us today.”

“Hi, it’s nice to meet you,” you gave him a smile. He didn’t speak, just gave you a small nod. Weird.

The three of you made your way back to your quarters. Upon arriving, you turned to Ap’lek.

“So, what’s the plan today?”

“What do you mean, Miss Ren?” he asked.

“What are we going to do today? Like, are we going to train or what?”

He chuckled, “Master Ren has said you are to rest. We will resume training once we get a confirmation from him.”

You huffed, crossing your arms. “Ugh, fine. I guess I’ll just be bored as fuck in here all day.”

“You know, Master Ren has quite the extensive library selection. You can access it from the control panel on the wall in the living area. We will be standing guard, should you need us.”

Sighing, “Thanks, Ap’lek.” You shut the door, looking around your empty quarters. The stars outside the bay window twinkled as you walked over to the wall, exposing the control panel. You flicked through various files until you found what looked like a symbol for a book. You clicked it, causing a hatch to open to your right. Various texts lined the shelves and they all looked rather old. You lightly traced your fingers along the spines before coming to rest on one that was solid black and looked newer than the others. To the left of it was a small box. Feeling curious, you pulled them both from the shelf and went to sit on the couch.

Opening the box, you found a variety of pens, ink containers, and small scrolls. You removed the twine from one of the scrolls and quickly realized you had no idea what any of the markings meant. You shrugged, tying it back and replacing the items in the box. You removed the band from the book and began to thumb through the pages. Beautiful calligraphy adorned the first few you skimmed across. You smiled to yourself knowing that Ben had such a delicate talent. You passed a couple more pages before stopping on two pages that mirrored each other. You read them silently in your mind:

_There is no emotion, there is peace._

_There is no ignorance, there is knowledge._

_There is no passion, there is serenity._

_There is no chaos, there is harmony._

_There is no death, there is the Force._

You moved to the next page, reciting its words in your head.

_Peace is a lie. There is only passion.  
Through passion I gain strength.  
Through strength I gain power.  
Through power I gain victory.  
Through victory my chains are broken.  
The Force shall free me._

You had no fucking clue what either of them meant, but you couldn’t help but think that they were both extreme in their wording. Why is it wrong to have emotion? How is peace a lie? You would have to ask Ben what they meant. Would he be mad about you going through his stuff? Who knows. You skimmed a couple more pages before you opened to a black and white sketch. It was a rough drawing of a young girl standing in a field. There wasn’t much detail in the sketch. It was from a distance and mostly just a figure. You flipped to the next page. The scene was the same, but the girl was closer and looked taller. Maybe older? Next page, same thing. And again, and again, and again. With each flip of the page the drawing got more detailed and the lines more precise. You stopped on the last page of the book. The girl was an adult and she was fully detailed. Long, shaded hair. A black gown draped from her body. A child with dark hair stood beside her.

It was you.

As the realization dawned on you, more images flashed before your eyes.

_The island._

_The child.  
_

_The graying woman._

_The multiplying figures._

_The crystals._

_Red._

_White._

A knock at the door forced you back into reality. You sat Ben’s belongings on the table, standing on shaking knees and breathing heavily as you made your way toward the door. Wiping the perspiration from your temple, you opened the door to see Ap’lek on the other side.

“I apologize for disturbing you, Miss Ren, but the Supreme Leader requests our presence. The Resistance pilot has escaped. We believe he was assisted by one of our own. Do not worry, he is not Force sensitive, therefore no threat to you. If you need Master Ren, reach out through your bond,” he spoke through the distortion, but you could hear the slight concern in his voice.

You swallowed, thinking back to your last encounter with the Resistance. “Okay, do you have a weapon I can have? Ya know, just in case?”

You practically heard the smirk under his mask as he removed the blaster and holster Ben had given you from his belt. You smiled at him as he handed it to you. He offered you a small nod before turning down the hallway, Ushar following behind him. You shut the door, holding the blaster close as you returned to the couch. Adjusting the holster on your thigh, you sighed thinking about the images that had surfaced yet again. You desperately needed to talk to Ben about it. You gathered Ben’s box and book and returned them to the shelf, tapping the control panel to close the hatch.

You walked so many fucking laps around your little home. You looked through all the clothes in your closet and noticed your lab jacket, pristinely white and hanging near the back. You reattached the lapel pin to it before moving on. You rearranged the cosmetics on the vanity. You went to Ben’s room and looked through his closet. Literally all of his clothes were black. You made some tea and ate a snack. You thought about what Ben would order for dinner. You opened the library again and looked through the books. They were all either very boring or in a language you didn’t understand. You stretched in front of the bay window. You were dying for some sort of interaction when you remembered that the nurse had said a droid would be by at some point to replace your implant. It was ridiculous, you craved interaction with a fucking robot.

You eventually resulted to trying to meditate some more. You sat cross-legged on the couch, taking deep breaths and opening your mind. You could sense all the different lifeforms moving throughout the ship. You sensed Ben and the Knights moving around the ship opposite to the side you were on. They were near the main hangar. You felt the crystals again, though not as prominent as the first time. They were still there, just pulsating a little softer now. Then, you felt a lifeforce moving towards your quarters. You opened your eyes and quickly moved to retrieve your blaster. You had no idea who it was.

You decided to be a brave bitch and threw the door open, just as they graced the front of it. A stormtrooper stood there with your blaster aimed at their forehead. You quickly retracted your arm as they backed away a few steps.

“Oh, I’m sorry,” you quickly apologized, tucking the blaster into the holster on your thigh. “Can I help you?”

The white helmet seemed to study you for a brief moment before speaking, “Uh, Miss Ren is it? Uhm, I was hoping to speak to you. I have some information for you.”

The voice seemed vaguely familiar, even distorted through the mask. Like one of those voices you’ve heard once ever. You furrowed your brow at him before opening the door and stepping to the side as he entered. Closing the door behind you, you watched as he looked around the room. You cleared your throat, gaining his attention.

“Who are you?” you asked. He didn’t say anything, just looked at the ground as if he was weighing his options.

“I said, who are you?” you asked again, hand resting on your blaster.

“Okay, okay,” he said, holding up his hands, “please don’t freak. I have very important information for you.” He reached for the helmet, removing it from his head. Your eyes about popped out of your head when you saw the same curly, brown hair that donned the man that stormed your quarters with Rey. You immediately lifted the blaster back to him as the helmet hit the ground with a thud.

“I said don’t freak! Sheesh, woman. I’m not gonna hurt you! Between the two of us, I’m pretty sure you could really fuck me up with your Force powers or whatever.”

He was right. You could kill him if you wanted to. He wasn’t armed, so you lowered your weapon and returned it to the holster, again. You crossed your hands over your chest, eyeing him.

“Alright, who are you?” you asked.

“My name is Poe Dameron. I’m with the Resistance.”

“Okay, and? I’d suggest you explain why you’re here fairly quickly, Poe Dameron. Preferably before Kylo gets back. I’d hate for him to literally obliterate you for being in our quarters.” You moved to lean against the dining room table, never taking your eyes off of him. He followed your movements, coming to stand in front of you.

“Listen, Leia sent me here with urgency. She believes you’re the only person who can save her son.”

You stood straight, “Save him from what, exactly?”

“The Dark side or whatever the hell it is with the Force.”

“She wants me to…save him?” This is stupid. He is a man of free will. He does whatever the fuck he wants to.

“Yes! Bring him back home. Get him away from this crazy shit.” He flailed his arms, motioning to the entirety of the ship.

“Listen, that decision is up to him. From what I know about that relationship, it’s not a good one and I have, like, zero business meddling with it.”

“But you’re like his girlfriend, right? Do you not see how terrible the First Order is? How terrible _he_ is? He killed his own father!”

You were trying to keep your cool, but he was seriously testing your patience. “Look, I’m not doing this. He has free will. He will do what he wants. I know he killed his father. That’s not my business. I killed my mother. It is what it is. It’s in the past.”

He furrowed his brows at you, shocked at your statement. “I can see that this is not going the way Leia thought it would. She sensed him differently. He seemed ‘at peace’ is what she said. I guess just keep doing whatever you’re doing.” He moved to get the helmet from the floor, turning to you. “Where did you come from, anyway?”

“As Kylo put it, hundreds of millions of star systems from here. And it’s the truth. I’m not sure how I got here. I don’t know what you are going to tell his mother, nor do I care. But you can let her know I do care about him and that I’m not leaving his side, regardless of what he chooses.”

He nodded, replacing the helmet. “Well, hun, I need you to do me a favor.”

“Don’t call me that. What?”

“Keep on lovin’ on him. Whatever you two have, it’s strong enough that Leia has felt a shift in him. I thought she had given up on him.”

You swallowed thickly at his statement, “I suggest you go before he gets any closer.”

He nodded and with a wave of your hand, the doors flew open, Poe sprinting out of them. You slammed them shut, falling onto the couch. Your mind was so clouded from the interaction you had just had. That Resistance pilot didn’t try to hurt you. He just wanted to talk? Ben’s mother is concerned about him. Then all those images you saw. Ben’s drawings. Ugh. So fucking exhausting. And you were hungry as shit.

You ignored the hunger and opted to just stay laid out on the couch. You rolled to your side, facing the cushion, as sleep consumed you.

+++++++++++++

A soft kiss to your forehead and a light jolt to your shoulder roused you from your dreams. You blinked the sleep from your eyes to see Ben standing over you, a small grin creasing his features as you made eye contact with him.

“Hey, sleepyhead,” he said as you sat up. He sat on the couch behind you, pulling you into his lap. You wrapped your arms around him and nuzzled into his neck as you threaded your fingers through his hair.

“Hey,” you yawned, letting out a small whimper that elicited a chuckle from him, “what time is it?”

“Well, it’s time for dinner. The service droid should be here soon.”

The events of earlier in the day began to flood your mind and a sudden dread overtook you. You sat up to look at Ben, worry crossing his features.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, gently cupping your face.

You leaned into his touch, “The Resistance pilot. What happened?”

Ben sighed, “He seemed to leave the ship through an escape pod. Multiple pods were launched at the same time. We sent a ship to the crash sites, but we were unable to locate him.”

“Did you find out who helped him?”

“No, even though I have some ideas about that. But, that’s not relevant at the moment. I’ve desperately needed you all day.”

Ben began placing soft kisses from your temple down to your neck. You sighed at the sensation, lulling your head to the side as he licked and nipped at the tender spot behind your ear.

“Ben…” you moaned, tugging at the roots of his hair. He growled in response, pulling you to straddle his lap. He kissed you with utter desperation, tongue lapping against your lips as it begged for entrance. You obliged, taking his tongue into your own mouth, lightly sucking on it and nipping at his lips. You felt wetness pool between your legs as your mind became foggy with desire. Before you could slip too much farther into that abyss, you pulled back, panting. Ben let out an annoyed moan at the loss of your kiss.

“Ben, we really have a lot to discuss,” you said, lightly licking the remnants of his saliva from your lips.

He drew small circles on your lower back, “Ugh, I guess you are right, sweetheart. Where should we start?”

You knew exactly where you wanted to start. You hopped up from his lap and went to the control panel on the wall, opening the library shelf. You looked over at Ben as he removed his boots and tunic, leaving him in his undershirt and pants. You smiled to yourself as you returned your attention to the shelf, retrieving the box and journal that had peaked your interest earlier. You returned to his lap, pressing a quick kiss to his cheek as you displayed the items in your lap.

“I’m sorry if I invaded your privacy,” you started, “Ap’lek told me about the library shelf in the wall and I found this. I was curious.”

He took the box in his hands. His large hands absolutely dwarfed the already small object. He opened it and thumbed through the scrolls, sighing to himself. You felt some discomfort through your bond, but it quickly diminished.

Shutting the box, he spoke, “This is from my days of training as a Jedi…A Light side user. They’re just manuscripts in the old Jedi language. Mostly just the Jedi code and notes from training.”

You handed him the journal, “What about this?” You flipped a few pages in until you found those two sets of texts you had read earlier. “Are one of these a Jedi code?”

Ben’s fingers lightly traced over the fading script, “Yes, this one is the Jedi code and this one is the code of the Sith.”

“They’re so…Absolute. And extreme from one another. Everything isn’t always so black and white,” you said, reading over the words in your head.

Ben looked at you, furrowing his brows, “What do you mean?”

“I don’t know, I guess I’m just wondering why you couldn’t have all of the things listed from both parties. Like, why not have peace and passion? You can be powerful and strong and still experience serenity. It’s just not black and white. That’s not how the world works, or at least where I’m from. Everything is more…gray.” You thumbed through the pages until you found the start of Ben’s sketches. Your eyes met his as you landed on the page. He looked as though he was lost in thought.

“These sketches,” you started, “they’re of the dream. They’re of me.”

“Yes,” he said, “Like I had said before, I’ve been seeing you for a long time. You just kept getting clearer. I started drawing the images. I knew they had to mean something. As if you were my destiny.”

Your heart fluttered. You flipped to the last image drawn. “What about this one?”

Ben took the journal in his hands, “This was the last dream I had before connecting with you in the lab.”

“And the child?”

He pressed his lips into a line, “I am not sure.”

“You don’t think…” you trailed off. There was no way you were ready for _that_ part of your life.

Ben shifted uncomfortably, “No, I don’t think that. I would have sensed it by now. And you’re protected.”

“You’re right,” you said, placing the items on the coffee table. A knock at the door startled you, causing you to jump to your feet. Ben chuckled as you walked over to answer the door. SR-932 stood on the other side with a tray, followed closely by what you assumed to be the medical droid that was to issue your implant replacement.

“Good evening, Miss Y/N!” SR-932 exclaimed as he entered the room, “This is meddroid MD-242. He has accompanied me to replace your implant.”

You opened the door wider so they could enter, and your eyes met Ben’s, who was now standing. Both droids gave him a slight bow as he spoke to you.

“Replacement?” he questioned. “Is there something wrong with the one you have?”

“I don’t think so,” you said, feeling the small lump in your arm, “the nurse said that I should get an upgraded one with your technology. I didn’t think too much about it.”

Ben turned to face the meddroid, “MD-242, who issued the replacement for Y/N?”

“Nurse-293, sir.”

Ben grabbed a data pad from the dining table and typed. “Odd. There is no Nurse-293 registered.” Wait, what?

“MD-242, leave the implant here for further inspection. Y/N is fine with the one she has.”

“Yes, Supreme Leader.” MD-242 placed the packaging on the table before exiting the room with SR-932.

“Ben, how is there no nurse with that identification? I know for a fact that was the name she told me when she entered the room.” You were worried. If there was no nurse registered like that, then who the fuck discharged you?

“I am not sure,” he sighed as he placed the dinner tray on the table, “but it does concern me. I had previously mentioned that one of our own helped the Resistance pilot escape the interrogation room, so it could be connected to that. I will have diagnostics ran on the implant to see if it is for its intended purpose.”

“Okay.”

You sat at the table, staring into the food on your plate as you thought about everything else you needed to discuss. Whatever Ben had ordered for dinner was delicious. It was some type of meat and vegetables. The two of you ate in silence for a bit before you spoke.

“I keep having these visions, Ben. When I touched the crystals and earlier when I found the journal. It’s always the same ones.”

He wiped his mouth with a napkin and swallowed his food, “Tell me about them.”

You took a breath, “I keep seeing the child,” a beat, “Another one of them is an island surrounded by all kinds of water. There’s something beneath it, in the depths of the sea. I keep seeing an older woman crying and holding some sort of doll. It looks like she is in a camp. Then, there’s the crystals… The two of us holding lightsabers that are bright white. And then… A figure. It’s a man. I don’t know who it is. He holds a red one and it’s like he multiplies into other figures.” The thought of the visions were overwhelming as you took a sip of water, waiting for Ben’s response.

When he didn’t respond immediately, you continued, “I also had a dream the night I woke up about the crystals. There was this man, again, I don’t know who he is. He—he told me that secrets about your family were about to surface. That all kinds of lies were going to be revealed. He told me that we are a dyad and the two of us must find balance in the Force.”

Ben sat for a moment studying you before speaking, “The island…I believe island you are referring to is on Ahch-To.” He summoned the data pad to his hand as he pulled up an image of the planet. Holograms of it appeared above the table as he began to swipe through them.

You stood, “Yes! That’s it.”

“Ahch-To is the birthplace of the Jedi Order. This is where my uncle went into hiding after…” he trailed off.

“After what?”

He sighed, “A story for another time.” Weird.

“I promise to tell you, Y/N, I do. I believe it is imperative we visit the planet, though. It is all but abandoned, except for alien caretakers.” You nodded, returning to your chair as the hologram disappeared. Ben finished his food before continuing the discussion on your visions.

“The woman…I believe you are seeing my mother, General Leia Organa of the Resistance.” You looked down at your plate. The image of his mother crossed your mind and you swore you could feel the pain and desperation she held for her son. Ben cleared the table of the empty dishes and took your hand as he led you to the couch, pulling you to sit with him.

“Lightsabers can be any color depending on the user. The kyber crystal has to be tempered, so to speak. It is a tiresome task that can take hours of meditation.” You listened intently as he addressed each of the visions, “As for the man you speak of and the visitor in your dream that told you of lies in my family, I can assure you I am just as lost as you are. Given my family history, lies are basically tradition.”

You nodded, nervous about what was to come next. You had to tell him about Poe.

“Ben, there’s something else…”

He ran his fingers through your hair, “What is it, sweetheart?”

“The Resistance pilot…” you gulped, “he was here.”

His hand froze in your hair, “What?” He sounded confused.

You squeezed your eyes shut, both of them starting to burn from the tears you fought back. You wanted to tell him sooner, but you were so afraid of his reaction—and you had every right to be afraid.

“He came to the quarters dressed as a Stormtrooper. I answered the door not knowing it was him.”

You still couldn’t turn to look at him as he spoke, “What did he want?” he said through gritted teeth, “Why didn’t you tell me sooner? If you were anybody else on this damn ship, you would be labeled a traitor and thrown out of an airlock by now.” He sat up, forcing you to look at him.

“H-he said he came to deliver a message to me…” you swallowed, “from your mother. She said that she felt a shift in you th-that you seemed more at peace. She—she said for me to keep caring about you to save you from the Dark side and bring you home.”

He rose from the couch, chest heaving and constricting beneath his undershirt. If he wasn’t about to lose his shit, you would’ve thought he looked hot as fuck. But, right now…You were terrified.

“That fucking…” he shouted, lightsaber igniting at his side as he began to rip through the steel wall. Metal shrieked at the abuse and shrapnel spat around the room. You jolted from the couch, making yourself as small as possible in a far corner. His eyes shot to you.

“You…You have made me _weak_.” He hissed the words at you, his features contorting into pure hatred. Tears fell down your cheeks as he continued cursing your existence.

“Ben, please…” you whispered weakly.

“YOU HAVE MADE ME WEAK!” he shouted at you as he stormed forward.

A bit of courage sparked in your chest, “Having someone show you affection does not make you weak, you asshole!” You screamed back at him, spit and tears flinging from your face. “Being afraid of my affection—of the possibility of being loved and returning that love makes you fucking weak!”

He stopped in his tracks, “What did you just say?”

You stared at him.

“What did you say, Y/N?!”

“You fucking heard me,” you spat as you threw the double doors open and ran out of your quarters.

You ran down the hallway, as far away as you could get while heaving breaths and tears poured. You ran into the training room, praying that none of the Knights would be in there. You slammed the doors behind you, sliding down them. You brought your knees to your chest and sobbed into your hands. Ugh. That could have went better. What shocked you even more is that Ben wasn’t mad about you talking to Poe, he was pissed at the idea of your relationship making him weak. What the fuck?

A movement in the corner of the training room caught your eye. You saw Vicrul, unmasked, stand, staring at you with concern on his face.

 _Of fucking course,_ you thought.

He walked over to you, squatting in front of you, “Hey, Princess. You okay?”

“Do I fucking look okay, asshat?”

He stood and stepped back, hands raised, “Don’t take it out on me, I ain’t done shit to you.”

He was right. You shouldn’t lash out at him like that.

“Sorry,” you said, starting to stand. He offered a hand to help you up and you took it. You moved to sit on a bench, Vicrul plopping down beside of you.

“Do you wanna talk about it?” he asked.

“Not really,” you said, brushing him off. You tucked a strand of hair behind your ear and wiped the tears from your eyes.

He laughed, rubbing the back of his neck, “He’s an ass sometimes, isn’t he?”

Of course, he knew you were crying over Ben. What the fuck else could it have been?

You laughed too, “Yeah, he is. But I am too.”

“You’ve got that right,” he agreed, playfully nudging you. “It’s like you two were made for each other or something.” Regret and defeat caked his words as he spoke.

“Or something…” you conceded. You remembered what Ben had said, about Vicrul’s affection for you. You didn’t return said affection, but you could use a friend right now.

You sighed, “The Resistance pilot showed up at our quarters. He told me Ben’s mother, General Leia Organa, said she felt a shift in him in the Force. Like he’s at peace or some shit. I don’t know,” you wringed your hands in your lap, “she wants me to ‘bring him home.’” You added some air quotes around the last bit.

“Anddd I’m assuming he didn’t take too well to that?” Vicrul asked.

“Obviously not,” you chuckled, “he said I make him weak. That my affection has made him weak.”

The two of you sat in silence as the words hung in the air.

“You don’t have to be with him,” he practically whispered.

“What?” you asked, face darting to meet his.

“Y/N, come on. You don’t have to be treated like that. I would never tell you that your affection makes me weak. That’s just…not right.”

Your mouth fell open as you stared at him. You couldn’t believe he actually said that.

“Vicrul, stop. I’m not having this conversation.” You stood abruptly, crossing to leave the room. He grabbed your arm, spinning you around and pulling you against his chest.

He squeezed you in a hug as he spoke, “Just think about it, okay? At least give me that.”

You pulled away from him, “Vicrul, I ca—”

The two of you were thrown apart from each other. As you hit the mat, you saw Ben standing in the doorway, saber ignited. Your eyes darted to Vicrul as he struggled to get up. Ben was going to kill him.

“Ben, NO!” you yelled, getting to your feet.

“You’re with him?!” Ben growled at you both, red blade inches from Vicrul’s face.

“What?! NO! It’s not like that! Search your feelings, you know better than that. I’m yours!” You walked cautiously toward him. Ben deactivated his saber and stuck out his hand toward Vicrul.

Vicrul raised into the air by an invisible Force, clawing at his throat. You ran over, tears streaming down your face as your desperately tried to pull Ben’s hand away. He shoved you back across the room, hitting your head against the wall. You felt a small drop of blood slide down your temple.

“Do you think you can take what is mine, Knight?” Vicrul’s face turned an ugly shade of red-purple as his body convulsed, saliva spilling from his mouth. You had to stop this.

“Ben, STOP IT!” He didn’t, if anything, it caused him to hold tighter.

There was no way you could physically pull him away, so you reached out with your own hand, pulling Ben away with the Force. He was too strong. You concentrated harder, sweat pouring down your face as the seconds ticked by on Vicrul’s life. Ben tried to push you away, but you pushed further. His grip faltered for a split second, allowing Vicrul to suck in a few desperate breaths before resuming.

You strained, tears streaming down your face and hand shaking as you pulled against Ben harder, and harder, and harder…

You felt it before you saw it. Heat, scalding heat, radiating from your hand.

White lightening shot from your fingertips, hitting both Ben and Vicrul, sending them flying in opposite directions. The shockwave of the lightening knocked you on your ass. You rose quickly, running to check on Ben.

“Ben! Ben, I’m so sorry, holy fuck.” You crashed beside him, pulling him to you. His eyes were wild as he cradled his hand near his chest. You placed a kiss to his forehead as you looked at his hand. Blood covered his torso and his hand was left in shards. You sobbed, emitting blubbering a “I’m sorry” whenever you could catch your breath. You ripped off a piece of your tunic and tightly wove it around his hand. His eyes never left your face as you worked to stop the bleeding until you could get him to the medical ward.

“Y/N… Baby, please. Look at me.”

Tears dripped from your face onto the fabric, soaking it.

“I’m okay, but you… You are incredible.” He pulled you into a kiss that could’ve healed any wound on your body or soul. You pulled away and remembered Vicrul.

“Oh my god, Vicrul,” you said, standing. You helped Ben to his feet and ran over to check on him.

Blood pooled around his body as small sparks of electricity shot out from him. His face was burned beyond recognition and he was surrounded by pieces of charred skin and clothing. You fell to your knees as Ben stood behind you. You couldn’t sense him in the Force. You couldn’t feel his pulse.

You killed him. You killed a Knight of Ren. You killed Vicrul.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A very important chapter for reader and Space Prince.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all SO MUCH for all the kudos and comments! We are at over 2K hits now and I'm doing a little happy dance in my bedroom. This might be a small achievement given the success of all the other fics out there, but I'm so grateful to share my story with you. Hope you enjoy this chapter. It might be a little shorter than usual, but it's a good one. <3

You weren’t sure how many days had passed since the incident. You had barely left your room. Yep, your room. Ben had insisted that you could stay with him, but you felt sick. You could barely face Ben, let alone face the other Knights after Vicrul’s death. His burnt skin and distorted face haunted you everywhere you went. It haunted your dreams. Granted, you didn’t even know what the fuck you did or how the fuck you did it.

Not only did you kill Vicrul, you destroyed Ben’s right hand. Like, fucking obliterated it. The hand he used in lightsaber combat. The hand he always uses to play with your hair. You also hadn’t seen him in person since you returned to your quarters, alone, that night. You waited until a medic was available in the training room and then you bolted, locking yourself in your room. You vomited in the shower as you washed the mixture of Ben’s and Vicrul’s blood from your body. Bloodshed that you had caused on your partner and your friend. Since you hadn’t seen Ben, you just knew his hand was amputated. There was no way to save it.

Ben had made sure to have food delivered to your door every day and kept in touch with you with the data pad he left for you as well. Sometimes you responded, sometimes you didn’t. He had tried to get you to speak to him face to face, but you refused. You also hadn’t tried to do anything with the Force. You were terrified of producing that lightening again. As sad as you were that you had killed Vicrul, you thought about if it had been Ben in his place. That thought made you vomit even more. 

You laid in bed, the sheets soaked with tears and wrapped in Ben’s sweater. You didn’t even know how it was possible that you could cry any more tears, but you did. You tried to fight the sleep, but you were exhausted. You began to drift as a loud banging caused you to jolt from the bed, almost falling in the floor. You realized someone was knocking on your door. You stood, crossing the room.

“Who is it?” you asked, voice breaking as you pulled Ben’s sweater down to cover your ass. You leaned against the door awaiting a reply.

“It’s Ap’lek, Miss Ren.” Oh, god. More tears spilled from your tired eyes as you thought of the Knights losing a brother. You heard him let out a loud sigh, “Y/N… Please open the door. It’s just me. I want to talk to you.”

You took a deep breath and wiped the tears from your face as you opened the door. Ap’lek stood there, unmasked, and looked completely vulnerable. You crashed against his chest, tightly wrapping your arms around his frame as a sob racked your body. He stilled, before cautiously wrapping an arm around your shoulders. Ap’lek led you to the couch and sat with you. He waited until you slowed your cries before speaking.

“Doctor, I know you are terrified and mortified of what happened. Vicrul was my friend, my brother, my comrade in arms. I have grieved properly for his loss, but you must realize that this was not your fault.” You sat up in protest, however, you were cut off by his continued speech. “You are strong with the Force. Horribly untrained and new to your powers, but exceptionally strong. Force lightening is not something that is easily obtained. It is mostly utilized by the Sith or Dark Side users, both of which I know you are not,” he said.

You nodded, pulling your hair to the side and twisting the ends, “I don’t know what I did or how it happened,” you whispered. “It’s like…It’s like something inside me is festering and I don’t know what to do with it, or how to channel it.”

Ap’lek agreed, “This is precisely why you must continue your training. You cannot hide away from Master Ren and the Knights forever.”

You hung your head, hands wringing in your lap as you considered him. Deep down, you knew he was right. You couldn’t stay hidden away and you needed to learn to control your powers.

“Where is he?” you asked.

“It’s around 1200 hours, so he is on the bridge,” he replied.

You sighed. You missed him desperately and you really wanted to see him. Although you were afraid of the damage you caused to his hand, you were more afraid of the repercussions from your prior conversation. That damage—any amount of it—was unbearable.

Letting out an exasperated breath, you spoke, “I want to see him. Will you escort me?”

Ap’lek gave you a small smile and patted your shoulder, “Of course, Miss Ren. I will wait outside the quarters for you to get dressed.”

He left the room, stationing himself outside the double doors of your quarters. You twisted your hair into a bun on top of your head as you returned to your room. You showered quickly and dried off. You applied some simple makeup and styled your hair into a loose updo on top of your head. The dress you chose was simple, lightweight black material. It hugged your frame with a high neckline and long sleeves and a large triangular cut out on your lower back. You paired it with your black pumps salvaged from Earth and strapped your blaster on your thigh beneath the slit of the dress. After giving yourself a once over in the mirror, you headed out. 

Meeting Ap’lek, masked, on the other side of the door, you became uneasy again. What if Ben hated you? Or didn’t want to be with you like that anymore? Just as your stomach began to churn at the thought, Ap’lek extended his arm to you.

“There is no reason to fret, Miss Ren. I can assure you Master Ren is not angry with you.” He spoke with a certainty that resolved the distasteful feeling swirling in your stomach.

“Okay,” you quietly replied, looping your arm through his. Ap’lek grabbed his ax that leaned against the wall behind you before starting down the hallway.

The walk to the bridge was utterly slow. Your nails and fingertips were digging into Ap’lek’s armor as your mind wandered. You wondered who knew what had happened. If any of the Finalizer’s crew had found out. By now, they had to know who you were. You didn’t exactly hide your relationship with the Supreme Leader. You swallowed, trying to rid the bile that was rising in your throat. Taking deep breaths, you focused your mind on the clicking of your heels against the tiled floor and the sweeping of your dress against your legs. As the hatch door to the bridge came into view, you stopped dead in the hallway, pulling Ap’lek with you.

“Miss Ren,” his distorted voice said, you just stared at the door.

“Y/N,” the use of your real name caught your attention, “it is alright. There is no reason to be afraid. In our world, people die all the time. Soldiers are disposable. He is not angry with you over that incident.”

So, he wasn’t angry over that, but he definitely could have been over something else. You sighed and lightly hugged Ap’lek.

“Thank you for being so kind to me,” you said. You knew the passing Stormtroopers and personnel were probably like, “What the fuck?” about you hugging a Knight of Ren. It must have looked strange, someone that looks like more of a creature in his attire showing compassion to another.

He pulled away with a nod, “Of course, Miss Ren.”

You walked ahead of him, the hatch doors flying open as you entered. As usual, nobody even looked up from their stations. You saw Ben on the far side of the room looking out the large bay window, Hux at his side. They seemed to be deep in conversation about something, but you didn’t care. You crossed the room, half expecting Ben to turn to face you. He didn’t.

“Supreme Leader,” you said, lightly touching the back of his cape.

He whipped around to face you, a small smile coming to his face before quickly disappearing. You thought he would be happy to see you. Right now, he didn’t seem to be so.

“Y/N, how lovely of you to join us,” Hux enthused, taking your hand in his and placing a small kiss to the tops of your knuckles. Your eyes went wide at his gesture. Did he want to fucking die today? Even so, Ben didn’t react, eyes locked on you.

“Armitage,” you spoke, retracting your hand, “if you would be so kind, I would like to speak to Kylo for a moment.”

His features tightened, “Of course, Doctor.” He turned on his heel, hand clasped behind his back as he walked away.

Moving to stand next to Ben, you stared out the window. A large planet spotted with shades of brown, red, and yellow showed in front of you, ships moving from the other Star Destroyers to its surface. You could feel Ben’s eyes still on you as you gazed out the window. The silence between the two of you was deafening—and so was the tension. Dying for his touch, you moved your hand to graze his gloved one, lightly lacing your fingers through his. He stilled but didn’t pull away. You reached out through your bond, calmly nudging the edge of his mind. You didn’t feel him. It was like he had shut his mind off to you.

Thinking back to the incident, you remembered how he had kissed you after practically blowing his hand off. How he had said you were incredible. What was different? Had the time spent apart—who knows how long it really was—affected him that much? Your heart ached at the thought.

 _Ben…_ you whispered in your mind, _what’s wrong?_

Out of the corner of your eye, you saw his lips press in a thin line and he averted his gaze to the window. He didn’t respond. You were sick. This was a mistake.

 _Ben, please. I’ve missed you._ You wanted to turn and run. _I’m so sorry for everything…_

He sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose, “I have something I want to show you.”

You nodded, lacing your arm through his as he led you out of the bridge. You walked for what felt like an eternity through varying hallways and corridors to a part of the ship you had never been in before. The farther you went, the less crew you saw. Eventually, there was no one around.

Ben stopped you in front of two large double doors. He walked you forward, the doors opening as if on command. The room was large and had no walls, just windows looking out into space. Above you hung an immaculate metal chandelier, centered in the room overhead the First Order’s symbol on the tiled floor. Ben stood at the edge of the room, doors closing behind him as you explored. At the very end of the room, up a small set of stairs, sat what looked to be a large throne. It was only one seat, but definitely big enough to fit two people.

Your toes reached the edge of the bottom step as you felt Ben approach behind you.

“It’s a throne room,” you said, still staring at the structure in front of you.

Ben paced behind you as he spoke, “When I assumed the role of Supreme Leader, I vowed to be more involved than my previous master. More on the front lines, I suppose you could say. I never envisioned anything but that until…Until you.”

You turned to face him. His features were contorted in a way that made it difficult to see his emotions. You opened your mouth to respond as he continued.

“You. A doctor from a planet god knows how far exactly from here. A figure in my mind that I have seen for years. You…A fucking beautiful, smart, talented woman that makes me question everything I have been told, have been taught, and have fought for as a man, Force user, and a Supreme Leader.”

You gawked at him, unsure of how to respond or where this conversation was going as he circled you like prey.

“I have never questioned my methods or ideologies. Ever.” He moved closer to you. You backed up, heels hitting the bottom step. “But you…You.” His gloved hands squeezed into fists at his sides as he gritted his teeth.

“What about me, Ben? Look, I feel terrible about what happened with Vicrul. I’m sorry about your hand. I need help. I don’t know what is happening! I—”

“This has nothing to with Vicrul. That has been taken care of.” What does that mean? “My hand is healed. This has to do with the fact that when I envision a future for the galaxy—for my rule—I just don’t see me on that throne…I see you with me.”

You narrowed your eyes, “Is that what this entire charade is about? You wanting me to be your Empress? Ben, I’ve already told you how I feel about that. I’ve already told you how I feel about you!”

He eyed you, gnawing his bottom lip.

“There’s more to it, isn’t there?”

He didn’t respond, just moved around you to position himself on the throne. You stepped up on the stairs until you were eye level with him.

“In our quarters that night,” you started, “you told me that I make you weak. That my affection for you had made you weak. Why, Ben? Why do you say that?”

He sighed, swatting hair from his face, “Your affection towards me has given the Resistance the opportunity to use you against me. To use you as a threat. That’s all my mother means by it. She just wants to use your feelings for me to manipulate me from my goal. To deviate me from the one thing I have worked toward. To use you as some petty excuse to remove myself from power.”

Uhm, that fucking hurt. There was, however, something in his voice that made you think he didn’t entirely believe that. You swallowed thickly and fought back tears that began to burn your eyes.

“So, where does that leave us? Do you want me to just not care about you?”

“That would be the most logical solution,” he replied.

You scoffed, “You can’t be fucking serious. I’ve spent so much time with you, grown with you, _fucked_ you, and here you are—telling me to not care about you?” You moved to stand over top of him, facing the throne. “That makes _zero_ damn sense, Ben. You’ve shown me more compassion than I have ever received from a man.”

He sat up straight, “I will not resign from power. I will not lose the galaxy at your expense.”

His words shocked you, however, they angered you more. You shot your hand forward, Ben’s head slamming against the back of the throne. He grunted as you held him in place by the Force, lightly squeezing around his neck. Opening your dress to straddle him, you replaced your Force hold on his neck with your own hand, digging your nails into the tender flesh. You knew he could overpower you at any point, but he didn’t. You thought he would be angry and retaliate, but his length hardening in his pants told you all you needed to know.

“You can’t fool me, Supreme Leader,” you mused, teeth grazing his earlobe. He swallowed beneath your grasp as you continued, “I’ve seen how you feel about me—I’ve _felt_ it.” You licked a stripe up the front of his neck. The tighter the hold on his neck got, the more you felt his dick harden and twitch between your legs. You began to grind regrettably slow against him. He writhed beneath you, desperate for more friction, as his hands reached around to harshly grab your ass.

The crack of the slap that connected against his face echoed throughout the throne room. His eyes went wild with hunger as you spoke, “Uh huh, Master Ren. You do not get to touch me. I’m going to grind on your fucking cock until you spill cum down the legs of your pants. Well, that is, if I feel like letting you finish.” You lifted yourself to straddle above him as you ran your hands through his hair.

“Y/N…Please…” he grunted, attempting to turn his head into your hands. You granted him that as you traced your thumb over his full, flushed lips. He took it in his mouth, lightly sucking, as he met your eyes. You smirked, lowering yourself back to his lap, continuing your previous movements.

“Fuck…” he moaned, he lulling back.

“Something wrong, Supreme Leader?” you cooed, placing small kisses along his neck.

You felt his jaw clench. Moving faster against his lap, you bit his neck, definitely leaving a mark. He winced at the sensation, but his dick throbbed beneath you.

“Tell me the truth, Master Ren.”

Grinding faster against his cock caused him to take deep, labored breaths. He spoke through gritted teeth, “What truth would that be, Doctor?”

“Tell me the truth about how you feel about me, Master Ren. I know you don’t want to stop this. I know you care about me, just as I care about you.”

You continued to quicken your pace. His ab muscles clenched beneath his tunic as he bit back his orgasm.

“Like I said previously, Doctor, I—fuckkkk…”

“I’m sorry, what was that?” you smirked.

His eyes darkened, “I will not lose power for something as senseless as companionship!” His hands flew to your hips, pressing you against his length harder.

You grasped his neck with every fiber of strength you could, his head smacking against the throne with a loud thump. You bore into him, “Stop fucking lying to me, Supreme Leader. Stop being so _afraid_ of caring about someone! Stop being so fucking afraid of being loved, coward.” You spit the last words against him, saliva flying on his lips. You hungrily pressed your mouth to his, tongues swirling and searching each other’s as you felt him near his orgasm beneath you.

“Say it, dammit. Say how you feel about me!” you bit his lip, drawing the slightest bit of blood that you sucked up.

“I—god damn it, Y/N…” he panted, lips and tongue slick over your neck.

You moaned at the sensation, desperate for him. “Please, Ben. Tell me. I’m yours. Let me be yours.”

“Y/N…” he buried his head in the crook of your neck. You knew he was close.

You threaded your hands through his raven locks as you whispered in his ear, “Cum for me, Supreme Leader. Cum for your Empress.”

The pulsation of his cock combined with the heat spread between your legs caused your own avalanche of an orgasm you didn’t know you were building to. You grasped at Ben’s hair, screaming his name as you writhed against him. The two of you stayed pressed against one another as you came down from your highs. Ben pulled away to look at you, sadness encasing his sculpted, beautiful face.

“Y/N… I want you in every way possible. I’m afraid for what the future might hold for us if I bring you into my world. I don’t want you to get hurt. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if something happened to you.”

Pure admiration seeped through your bond as Ben reopened his end to you. He feels _so_ much and it’s all for you.

You cupped his face, “I’m yours, asshole. I’m not going anywhere. I stand with you, as long as you will have me. We can do this together, as one.”

He leaned into your touch, eyes closed, “I want you. Forever. I’m so…”

“You’re afraid of love.”

He swallowed, “I have never experienced it truly, I believe. So, yes. I am afraid of loving and being loved in return.”

You gnawed your bottom lip, “You’re not alone.”

His eyes met yours with an understanding of just how new and terrifying this was for both of you. How you were connected on more than just a physical and emotional level. No, you were connected on a spiritual one—one that would tether your souls until the end of your days.

He lightly brushed your jaw with his gloved hand before sliding it around the base of your hairline, gently holding the back of your neck.

He spoke softly with his forehead pressed to yours, “Neither are you.” A beat. “I love you.”


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Filth, pure filth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's ya girl and I fucking suck at updating. Between finally getting back to work (I'm a hair and makeup artist), life, my dog dying, all of it...Sorry this took for fucking ever!
> 
> Thank you all SO MUCH for the kudos and comments! Literally you guys are keeping me going on this shit. Please leave me more! It makes me feel like a special bitch. Enjoy all the fucking!

“Neither are you.” A beat. “I love you.”

You smiled, closing your eyes in contentment, “I love you, Ben Solo.”

He pulled back, hands resting on your waist. You brushed a strand of hair from his eyes as you stared back at him.

“Say that again,” he said.

“I love you, Ben Solo.”

He captured your lips with a fire that was hot enough to reignite the dying stars throughout the galaxy. He pulled you against his chest, hands grasping firm on your skin as your tongues danced together, teeth grazing one another. Snaking your hands up his chest, you clawed at the collar of his tunic, desperate for more contact with his pale skin. You unclasped his cape from his shoulders as he went up under your dress, hands squeezing the roundness of your ass.

“Again,” he pleaded, gloved hands working the zipper on the side of your dress as he delved his tongue back into your mouth.

You felt your lace underwear rip out from under the dress as you spoke, “I love you, Ben Solo.”

Ben stood with you, supporting your weight as he threw his cape on the ground, spreading out across the tile below the throne. He descended the stairs, mouth never separating from your own. He crouched with you, laying you delicately on the cape, hair splayed out around your head. He pulled your dress down from your neck and removed your arms, resting the top of your dress around the dip in your waist. Your nipples perked at the cold air, eliciting a smirk from Ben. You blushed in response as he hovered over top of you, feeling him harden against your inner thigh.

You pulled his face to yours, lightly kissing his full lips before speaking against them, “I love you, Ben Solo.”

A small gasp escaped him as he realized that this was real. You were here and you loved him. He freed his length from his pants, precum dripping down your upper thigh as he lined himself up with your entrance. He pushed himself into you, your walls still slick and heated from your previous orgasm. You both panted at the sensation, hands ripping at each other’s clothes as he pumped his cock deep inside you, barreling into your cervix.

“B-Ben!” you screamed, arching under him and throwing your head back, the stars glistening outside the windows as Ben fucked you beneath his throne. Sounds of slapping skin and heavy moans echoed off the walls of the room.

He dipped his head between your breasts, ramming his cock deeper inside you. He sucked and bit the tender flesh there, tracing the outline of your tattoo under his tongue. He moved to your nipples mouth flailing over each one, tongue lapping at the sensitive bud. You ripped at his hair, nails digging into his scalp as he fucked you into oblivion. You felt your orgasm building again, hot and searing in your lower belly.

“Fuck, Ben—I’m gonna cum!”

He groaned, burying his head in the crook of your neck, “Say—fuck. Say it again.” He fully seated himself inside you, pounding into you as he pulled you tighter against him.

You panted, needing your own release, “I-I love you, Ben Solo!”

You screamed his name, plummeting into your high, Ben spilling himself inside you. Staying inside you, he kissed you sweetly, murmuring against your lips, “I love you, Y/N L/N.”

You sighed, feeling as though you could never experience a greater joy than this. Ben slipped out of you, the mix of your juices seeping out of you and running down your ass. You pulled yourself to a sitting position as Ben readjusted his clothes.

“That was amazing,” you said, replacing the dress around your upper half. Ben reached down to help you to your feet and grabbed his cape behind you. You felt the remnants of your affair run down your leg. You reddened at the thought of the long trek back to your quarters with cum trailing behind you.

Ben laughed, “Here,” he said. He wrapped his cape around your shoulders, concealing whatever evidence under the dark cloak. He pulled you to his chest, resting his face in your hair, deeply inhaling your scent. You couldn’t help but think that you wouldn’t be able to walk correctly after the ravaging your cunt just endured.

“Come on,” Ben wrapped an arm around your waist, supporting you as he led you toward the exit.

“Where are we going?” you asked.

“Well, first, we have to go back to our quarters and get you cleaned up,” he smirked down at you, “then we will be meeting with Hux before leaving.”

“Leaving for what?” you asked again.

“Ahch-To.”

+++++++++++++

The two of you changed and you packed your bag. You weren’t exactly sure what to pack for your visit to Ahch-To, so you pretty much packed a little bit of everything for whatever temperament you would experience. You met Ben in the living area, his hair still wet from his shower and wearing an exact copy of his Supreme Leader attire. You heaved your bag over your shoulder, grunting at the weight of it. Ben turned to face you at the sound of your struggle.

“What all did you pack, sweetheart?” Ben took the bag from you, slinging it over his own shoulder. “Feels like you packed the entire closet.”

You rolled your eyes. To be honest, you kinda did. This was your first trip off ship since Crait and you wanted to be prepared.

The two of you made your way down the halls of the Finalizer, the crew—as usual—cowering to the sides along the walls. You laughed to yourself. If only they knew the Supreme Leader you knew. Ben led you to a hatch door that flew open on command, Hux inside along with a few other personnel you didn’t know. You really didn’t care to know them. Ben led you to the two vacant seats at the head of the table, pulling out a chair for you before seating himself next you, your bag landing in the floor.

“Ah, good,” Hux started, “now that we’re all here.”

You rolled your eyes and Ben nudged your leg under the table.

 _Be good,_ he whispered in your head.

 _Yes, Supreme Leader,_ you cooed back to him. He shifted in his seat. This could be fun.

“Proceed, Hux,” Ben ordered.

“We’ve received intelligence that an outside force is brewing in the Unknown Regions,” Hux droned on. “This militia is not part of the Resistance nor is it part of the First Order. We have yet to actually track them down.” A hologram of some planet appeared above the table, but you had stopped listening. You were too busy trying to mess with your Supreme Leader.

You couldn’t stop thinking about how much you wanted him as you sat and stole a few glances in his direction. You imagined a few scenarios, completely opening up your bond and projecting them so you knew Ben would see them:

_You bent over—face down, ass up—constricted by ropes and nude as Ben circled you, deciding which orifice on you to obliterate first._

_Ben fucking you up against the bay window that overlooks the hangar._

_Riding his face while you suck his cock._

_Ben watching you while you masturbate with his lights—_

A hard shock to your clit made you almost jump out of your seat. The commotion, of course, caught the attention of Hux.

“Is something wrong, Doctor?” Hux asked, causing all attention at the conference table to shift to you.

The Force on your clit let up, “No, I’m fine. Please continue, Armitage.” You smiled sweetly at him.

 _What the fuck?!_ you shot at Ben.

His head nodded in your direction, _I suggest you keep those filthy thoughts to yourself unless you want me to make you gag on my cock in front of the entire committee._

_You’d like that, wouldn’t you, Supreme Leader? To let these pathetic idiots know that I’m your whore? To let them watch me worship your fucking cock?_

Ben stood abruptly, “If that is all, Hux, Y/N and I will be on our way.”

“Supreme Leader, I must say that we—”

“Send it to my datapad. Let’s go.” Ben grabbed your bag from the floor and started out of the room. You basically had to run to keep up with him. He led you to the hangar to the ship you had arrived on the Finalizer with. The hatch door was open, waiting your arrival. You entered behind Ben, the door sealing as you stepped off the ramp. Ben dropped your bag in the hall, so you quickly took it down to the bedroom. You returned to the cockpit to find Ben manning the controls.

“Where’s the pilot?” you asked, seating yourself in the copilot’s seat.

He didn’t speak, just continued pressing buttons and operating controls that were foreign to you. Soon, you slowly lifted from the hangar floor and floated into open space. Apparently, he was the pilot.

It was magnificent and truly unlike anything you had ever seen before. Ships came and went from crafts like the Finalizer and multiple planets appeared in the distance. You stood to get a better look out the window. You wondered which planet you were venturing down to.

“Ahch-To isn’t any of these planets,” Ben said, “I suggest you sit down and strap in before we jump to lightspeed.”

You did as he said, “Lightspeed? I thought that was just some theory in the scientific community.”

He smirked, “Hold on, sweetheart.”

Ben pushed forward on a lever that made the stars blur at your sides. You jolted back against the seat at the initial force, gawking at the stars that turned into stripes around you. Ben rose from the seat and started down the hall. You quickly realized nobody was flying the ship. You unbuckled and went after him.

“Uhm, are we going to fucking die? Shouldn’t you be up there flying this thing or whatever?” you said as you rounded the corner to Ben removing his cape.

“It’s on autopilot, sweetheart.”

You felt stupid, “Oh.” You kicked off your shoes and propped up on the bed.

“So how long will it take to get there?” you asked.

“Approximately four hours,” Ben replied, removing off his boots and unbuttoning his tunic.

“So, what now?”

An invisible Force pulled you across the room, seating your throat in Ben’s grasp. He peered down at you, his eyes darkened further than you had ever seen them before.

“Do you really think I’m going to let you off easy after that little stunt you pulled in the conference room, Doctor?” You felt your cunt immediately soak your underwear.

You gulped under his hand in response.

“Hmm…” He moved around you, pressing your backside flush against him, his hand tightening further. You could already feel him hardening against your ass.

He forced your head backwards, resting it in the crook of his neck as he firmly gripped your throat. His free hand moved to cup your breasts, forcefully kneading them beneath the fabric of your clothes. His breath was hot in your ear as his hand moved lower, teasing the band of your leggings. You whimpered at the touch, desperate for him.

“Oh,” he mocked you, “pathetic bitch. Always wanting this fucking cock. I don’t think you deserve it.”

He shoved you onto the mattress, knocking your head against the steel wall behind it. You quickly moved to sit against it, eyes wide as your Supreme Leader the stalked the edge of the bed. A darkness overshadowed his features that you had come close to seeing before, but never truly experienced. You cowered against the cold wall as he moved closer, pulling your knees to your chest.

“Absolutely not,” he hissed. A flick of his wrist sent you flat on the bed, sprawled out, and locked in position. You struggled against his hold, a grip tightening around your neck as sweat dripped down your temple. Ben eyed you, pacing slowly. You continued to silently writhe against his restraint, causing him to stop, peering down at you. He examined your form constricting under your clothing before another flick of his wrist sent the fabric ripping from your body, shreds laying piled around you. Your bare skin chilled immediately, your nipples perking on impact with the cold air of space.

“Better,” he said, lightly tracing the inside of your thigh with his fingertips. You moaned at his caress, still held immobile by the Force. He chuckled, teasing the outside of your cunt with his touch. He pulled away, eliciting a saddened whimper from you. The invisible hold around your body dissipated as Ben seated himself in a chair at the foot of the bed. Propping up on your elbows, you eyed him questioningly.

“Touch yourself,” he breathed, reclining in the seat and resting his forehead against his propped arm.

“What?” you asked, slightly stunned at his forwardness. Your body slammed back down against the mattress in response.

“I said, fucking touch yourself,” he spit at you.

You gulped. At the angle Ben was, he would see every movement you made against the wetness of your cunt. Granted, he had been up close and personal with it, but you had not done this in front of him yet. Bending your legs up, your hand traced down your body to rest on top of your folds, gently coursing your fingers through them. You sighed at the friction, relief flooding your senses.

“Spread your legs farther.”

You did as instructed, looking down to see Ben staring back between them, his eyes fixating on your fingers drawing circles around your swollen clit. Arousal seeped through your bond as you continued, bringing your opposite hand to twist and pull at your hardened nipples.

“Good girl,” he praised you, “Now, add a finger inside that pretty cunt.”

You slipped a finger inside, gently moving in and out.

“Another one.”

Adding a second finger, you began to pump inside your pussy. Your hand became slick with your juices, causing it to run down the palm of your hand. You panted as you finger fucked yourself, moaning Ben’s name as you sent images of him fucking you through your bond. Ben moved to his knees at the foot of the bed, intently watching you finger yourself. He bit at the inside of your thighs, causing you to squeal. You removed your fingers, expecting him to take over, but he chuckled in response.

“Oh, Doctor,” he mused, “I have so much planned for you. I suggest you stretch that fucking cunt out.”

You furrowed your brows. Ben removed his lightsaber from his belt and your eyes grew wide.

 _He can’t be serious…_ you thought.

“Oh, but I am. You think you can torment me like that in front of my officers and there won’t be punishment for it?” He traced the hilt up and down the insides of your legs. The metal elicited chill bumps everywhere it touched. He eventually came to rest it at the top of your pussy, lightly running it along your folds.

“I would suggest you stay still, Doctor. It would be a shame if the blade was accidentally ignited.”

You sat up, starting to panic, as he forced the weapon inside your cunt. You screamed at the intrusion, the various protrusions and designs on it ripping into your soft warmth. You writhed against him, causing Ben to hold your hips in place with his arm as he slowly fucked you with the sword. Tears pricked your eyes as you stretched around it. The pain was torturous; however, you knew your cunt was drenched from it. You dropped your head back, blubbering unintelligible sounds as Ben fucked you faster.

“What was that, Doctor? I didn’t hear you.”

“Mmm—fuck Ben!” He pounded your pussy with his weapon. A hard slap to your breast made you scream. The tender flesh swelled and stung to the touch.

“You will address me properly, whore.”

“Y-yes, Supreme Leader,” you whimpered as tears leaked from your eyes. You cried out from the onslaught on your cunt, partially in pain and mostly nearing your climax.

“Do you want to cum, bitch?”

“Yessss, please! Please, Supreme Leader. Please, let me cum, sir.”

He smirked at you, “Pathetic, cum on my weapon like the fucking desperate whore you are.”

You saw white as you clenched around the saber, whimpering as you came down from your high and he removed the weapon. The aching throb in your pussy aroused you again, causing you to practical drool at the thought of Ben’s cock. You sat up, sore. Ben held the lightsaber in front of your face, covered in your cum.

“Clean it.”

You licked every crevice of the saber, never blinking or losing eye contact with Ben as you swallowed down your juices. He tossed the cleaned saber to the chair and gently traced your lips with his thumb. You scooted to sit on the edge of the bed, Ben standing between your legs, eye-level with his hardened cock constricted in his pants.

You peered up at him through your lashes, “Fuck my mouth, Supreme Leader,” you murmured, “I want your cum down my throat.”

“Such a good girl, so willing to please.” He leaned down, planting a firm kiss against your swollen lips and grasping your jaw. His tongue danced along your lips as you parted them, swirling your tongue with his. Your hands flew to his pants, undoing his belt and hurriedly pulling them to the floor. Ben’s cock sprung free, bouncing off your tits. You broke the kiss, moving quick to suck the precum leaking from his swollen member. Moving your lips up and down the shaft, you used a free hand to massage his balls before taking him fully in your mouth, gagging as his cock rammed into the back of your throat.

Ben fisted your hair in a knot, “Take that fucking cock. The whole thing, slut. The whole fucking thing.”

He shoved your head against him, your throat burning as his dick moved farther down, your lips seated at his pelvis. Thick drool fell out of your mouth as he fucked your throat deeper that he ever had before, tears falling from your eyes. You opened your mouth wider, extending your tongue outside of your mouth to lap at his balls.

“Fuck, baby. That fucking mouth—god dammit.”

He pulled his cock out of your mouth as you gasped for air. Ben fisted his member in front of you, a mix of saliva and precum slinging all over your breasts. You sat up straighter, taking his cock and seating it between your tits and wrapping your hands over them. You spit down on his cock as you began to fuck him with your tits. Ben took over, moving faster between them as you leaned forward to lick and nip at his abs.

“Such a good girl for your Master, baby. You like this fucking cock?”

“I fucking love this cock, Master Ren,” you knew he was getting close, “Fucking cum on me. Cum on my face, Master, please!”

Ben pulled away, pumping his cock two quick times before his hot seed shot across your breasts and your face. You opened your mouth, eager to taste him. You cleaned his cum from your skin, lapping it up off your fingers. You noticed Ben watching you, his cock still unbelievably hard, red, and angry as he pumped himself.

“We’re not done yet,” he said.

“What did you have in mind, Supreme Leader?” you cooed.

He picked you up, turning you over on the bed. You hadn’t done this position yet.

“Get that fucking ass up, slut.”

You went on your knees, raising your ass off the bed and arching your back as you pressed your chest to the mattress. Ben moved around you, picking up a discarded shred of fabric from your destroyed clothes before returning to behind you. He took your hands, placing them crossed at the small of your back and tied them tightly with the fabric.

“You look so gorgeous like this, Doctor,” he mused, “restrained, naked, exposed, covered in cum…I think I need to see you like this more often.” You felt his index finger slowly trace your folds, sending chills up your spine.

“Anything for you, Master Ren,” you sighed, face pressed against the mattress.

He continued to trace your folds, then moving to trace the rim of your asshole. The sensation aroused you immediately.

“Anything?” he asked, beginning to press his thumb into your ass. You winced at the invasion, taking a deep breath as he entered you deeper.

“A-anything,” you whimpered.

Ben lined his cock up with your cunt, “Good girl.”

He slammed his cock into your pussy and his thumb fully in your ass. He fucked you at a ruthless pace, your face and chest being smashed into the bed so hard you could barely breathe. Your thoughts and sounds were a wreck. All you could sense or feel was Ben’s fucking cock tearing into your cunt and ravaging your cervix. Your eyes rolled to the back of your head as you mouth hung agape, drool soaking the satin sheets below you. The sound of slapping skin echoed off the walls of the ship.

Ben pulled his hand from your asshole and sent a searing smack across your ass cheek. You yelped and arched your head up as he continued to fuck you. Ben’s hand wrapped around the back of your neck, jerking you upright against his chest as he seated himself fully in you. Your tits bounced wildly as he choked you, your head resting against the cook of his neck.

“This fucking cunt,” he hissed in your ear, “belongs to me. _You_ belong to me. I fucking own you.”

“Yes, yes, yes!”

Ben adjusted his hips, hitting a spot that sent chills down your spine and a hotness in your lower belly that was scorching. Your legs trembled beneath you at the new sensation, and you felt your orgasm coming. It was building but it was different, and there was no stopping it.

Ben stabbed his cock into that spot one last time, sending you over the edge. You screamed out for him as you felt wetness spill from your pussy, forcing his cock out of you as you fell back onto the bed. You writhed against the sheets, now drenched from your juices. Your mind was still in a haze as Ben flipped you over, prying your legs open and delving into your cunt with his mouth.

“Good girl,” he mumbled as his mouth sucked on your clit. You had never done _that_ before. At that moment, it dawned on you what had happened and you momentarily freaked, but the sight of Ben literally _licking_ the liquid from your cunt and what had fallen down your legs was enough to make you cum again.

Ben stood, hovering over you as he entered you again. You both moaned at the feeling—slick and like you were made for one another. He reached behind you and undid the fabric tied on your wrists. Your hands immediately went to his hair, pulling his lips to meet yours. The fullness of his lips enveloped your own and his tongue tasted of your cunt. You pulled him closer, wanting him, _needing_ him. His thrusts became sloppy and uneven and you knew he was close. You wrapped your legs around his lower back, lifting your hips to meet his own as you continued to kiss him. He moaned against your mouth before breaking the kiss and leaving bites along your neck.

“Fuck, Ben…Oh god,” you arched beneath him, so close to your own release.

“Mmm, baby, cum for me. Cum on my cock, my Empress.”

He sank a bite into your neck that you knew would bruise. The pain from it triggered your orgasm, your pussy clenching and tightening around Ben’s cock, sending him into his own avalanche. He spilled inside you, his head buried in the crook of your neck. You sighed in contentment. Content caused by Ben’s large form cuddled to your own and the fact he had just fucked you senseless. You pulled his lips to yours as you both turned on your sides facing one another. You ran your hands through his hair, closing your eyes, desperately needing sleep after that many orgasms.

“I love you, sweetheart,” Ben said, pressing a sweet kiss to the tip of your nose.

You smiled, “I love you, Ben Solo.”


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome back! My life is a shit show at the moment, so I am updating as soon as I possibly can. Thank you all for the kudos and comments--they're really keeping me going on this! I hope you enjoy this chapter.

_Same grass. Same waterfall. Same gray dress. Same dream._

_You walked along the water’s edge, sighing at the sight of the ever-constant landscape. You continued, noticing the stone bench that man had led you to previously. You sat, twirling a stray piece of hair between your fingers as the mist from the waterfall kissed your skin._

_“Ah, we meet again, Y/N…” the man approached from behind you, seating himself on the bench._

_“I guess we do,” you replied, shifting to make room for him._

_“It appears that you have discovered that the crystals have called to you,” he said. You nodded in agreement as he continued, “it is imperative that you locate the hidden archives on Ahch-To. This is the only way for both of you to reach your highest potential.”_

_You turned to him, your eyes resting on the scar on his face, “What are you even going on about? Why won’t you tell me who you are?”_

_He sighed, standing, “It is best that my identity is not revealed.”_

_“Well, I’m sure Ben knows who you are, so I’ll j—”_

_“No,” he cut you off, “Ben Solo must not know of our communication. In time, yes, this will be revealed to him. You must make this journey together without my interference. I am simply here to guide you.”_

_He started off, and you closed in behind him, grabbing his shoulder and whipping him around to face you._

_“Who are you?” you asked again, enunciating each word._

_He pursed his lips, glancing to the side, “Ask him about the helmet. I know you’ve seen it in his chambers. Ask him, then you shall know.”_

_You crossed your arms over your chest, “Fine…But what danger is coming? This is extremely confusing. Why not just warn him yourself?”_

_At that moment, storm clouds surrounded you, the warmth from the sun dissipating. A sudden screech caused both of you to turn, staring into the field that stretched out in front of you. Darkness encased you both as red streaks of light ignited in the grass. A tall, dark-haired figure stalked forward, a red lightsaber raised above his head._

_“Go!” the other man yelled, “Find the balance! Save him!”_

_You ran as the red sabers followed, blackness shredded the garment from your body as the ground gave beneath you._

+++++++++++++

The feeling of falling launched you out of your dream state, jolting upright in the bed. Your skin was slick with sweat. You ran a hand through your hair as you tried to catch your breath. You noticed that Ben was no longer in bed with you, but he had wrapped you in a blanket.

 _Sweet Supreme Leader…_ you thought, smiling to yourself.

You looked out the window in the room, streams of starlight still flying by. Rising from the bed, you noticed Ben’s cape still hanging off the side of the chair. You thought back to the dream you just had, how the man had instructed you to ask him about the destroyed helmet in his chambers. The images of blazing red sabers filled your mind. You couldn’t help but wonder what it meant. You desperately needed Ben’s guidance on your dreams and visions.

Grabbing Ben’s cape from the chair, you wrapped it around your naked form as you headed down the hallway to the cockpit. You paused in the doorway, admiring that beautiful head of raven locks stationed in front of you.

“You know, Doctor,” Ben started, sensing your presence, “it’s awfully rude to stand in the doorway.” He faced the window, manipulating some controls.

You smiled to yourself, holding his cape under your arms, as you crossed to stand next to him. He peered up at you, smirking.

“What?” you asked, slightly annoyed at the all too pleased look on his face.

“Nothing,” he said, reverting his gaze back to the window.

“Ben, what is it?” you persisted.

He sighed, “I don’t know. I just never thought I would have this,” he replied, gesturing to you.

You snorted, “What? A naked woman wrapped up in your cape?” You moved to run your fingers through his hair. He leaned into your touch.

“Funny, but no. I meant this companionship—love. I never dreamed I could love someone as I love you, nor did I believe I could ever earn that returned affection.” Wrapping an arm around his shoulders, you pressed a kiss to his cheek.

“I’ll love you forever, I promise,” you said—and you meant every word.

He cupped your jaw, placing a soft kiss against your lips. You would never get used to how good he tasted or the plushness of his lips. You felt as though you were drunk off his very essence.

He pulled away, “We’re about to drop out of lightspeed, you might want to grab a seat.”

You moved around him, placing yourself directly in his lap. He chuckled, kissing your temple as he reached around you to press some buttons that you had no clue what the fuck they did.

The lines of light surrounding the ship suddenly stopped, a planet sat before you, mostly covered in water. The ship moved slowly toward it and you leaned forward in awe of the sight. As you entered the planet’s atmosphere, pillowing clouds flew by. In the distance, you saw an island— _the island_ —from your dream.

 _This is crazy,_ you thought.

He laughed, “You will find that a lot of the things the Force shows you will make you feel crazy.”

You laughed too as Ben landed the ship on a rocky cliff. From the look of the island, it looked completely deserted. While you were here for a reason, you were definitely not ready to give up your time in your Supreme Leader’s lap.

You wrapped your arms around Ben’s neck, the cape dropping to your waist, exposing your breasts. He kissed you fervently, his breath hot against your skin. You moved to straddle him in the seat, the cape falling to the floor as you sat completely nude on top of him. His gloved hands grabbed at your skin, eliciting a moan from you as he explored your neck with his tongue.

You leaned your head back, sighing in ecstasy, when you noticed a flashing light on the control panel.

“What is that?” you asked, nodding your head toward the light.

“It’s a transmission. Someone is trying to contact us,” he said, pulling you to the side. He reached to the floor, gathering his cape. “Here, put this around you.”

You did as he said, repositioning yourself in his lap. Ben hit a button and a blue hologram appeared in front of you. It was Ap’lek.

“Master Ren, Miss Ren,” he said, offering a slight bow.

“Hey, Ap’lek,” you smiled. Ben rolled his eyes.

“Master, I have the diagnostic report that was ran on the implant that was supposed to be administered to Miss Ren.”

You eyed Ben, sitting up straighter and holding his cape tight.

“Continue,” Ben said, his hand tight on your waist.

“It appears that the implant contained a toxin that would, over time, slowly kill the recipient. The device had a slow release feature that would cause death over the course of two weeks. According to the laboratory doctors, the toxin used would cause a progressive disease that would end with a comatose state, eventually death.”

You were silent, staring through the image in front of you to the rocky landscape of the island. Someone was trying to _kill_ you? What the fuck? Ben’s grip tightened on your waist.

“And what of the so-called nurse that approved it for the med droid’s administration?” Ben asked through gritted teeth. You took his free hand, drawing circles against the back of his glove to ease the anger you were feeling through your bond.

“Yes, sir. We did locate the nurse imposter. Apparently, she decided to deprive herself of life as opposed to facing your wrath. We found her body locked in an escape pod. She had given herself a blaster shot to the head.”

Your jaw dropped. Whoever that girl was, she was sent on a fucking suicide mission to assassinate you. Ben had previously warned you that your relationship could cause his enemies to use you against him.

Ap’lek continued, “We ran a scan on what was left of her and couldn’t find any matches throughout the known star systems. Whoever she was, she wasn’t First Order, nor was she Resistance.”

“How can you be sure?” you asked. Ben looked toward you. “How do you know she wasn’t with the Resistance?”

Ap’lek sighed, “Well, the Resistance is far shorter in numbers now than they have ever been. Losing even one member would greatly impact their resources. That and, well, something like this isn’t necessarily their style. While we have had Stormtroopers that have been captured and interrogated, we have never experienced something of this magnitude from them.”

“Thank you Ap’lek,” Ben said, reaching for the controls. The hologram disappeared.

You scrunched your face, wondering who could possibly want to end your life. And why? What could ending your life do to Ben? You looked back at him, worry mixed with pure anger drowned his features. You placed a soft kiss against his full lips and he seemed to melt beneath you.

“C’mon, Supreme Leader,” you said, getting to your feet and pulling him with you, “Let’s go explore.”

+++++++++++++

You met Ben at the base of the ship’s ramp. The temperature on Ahch-To was somewhat colder than you anticipated, so Ben graciously strapped his cape around your shoulders. You silently laughed to yourself about your outfit choice. It was basically Ben’s outfit except you wore leather leggings and your tunic had a more feminine fit with a plunging neckline.

You held his hand as you walked across the rocky terrain of the abandoned island. Small stone huts appeared before you as well as a large stone staircase that ascended up the mountain. The two of you walked for what felt like literal days, never finding or sensing anything of interest. Ben was about to lead you up another set of steps when you plopped down on the ground, desperate to rid your aching feet of the combat boots you had laced on them.

“What is the point of this? We have walked all over this damn island and we haven’t found shit other than a bunch of rocks and a huge burnt place in the side of the mountain.” You removed your boots, stretching out on the soft grass.

Ben chuckled, sitting beside you, “Well, sweetheart, I can’t make the Force guide us. Maybe we should take a break and meditate. Maybe that will help.”

“Can I meditate laying down?” you said, arm slung across your face to shield your eyes from the planet’s sun.

“Very funny,” Ben replied, “sit up, lazy girl.”

You rolled your eyes, “Can I sit in your lap?”

“Y/N…” Ben scolded you. You knew he was serious when he used your real name.

“Okay, okay, _Supreme Leader,_ ” you mused. You sat across from Ben when he reached forward to hold your hands between the two of you. You eyed him curiously.

“You _can_ hold my hands, though.” You smiled. “Being physically connected with one another will strengthen our connection to the Force.”

You snorted, “I know other ways we could be physically connected…”

Ben stared at you, “Sweetheart, I will fuck you senseless later, but we do have a mission to carry out.”

You laughed, “Fine, let’s get this over with.”

The two of you breathed in sync, drowning out the sounds from wildlife and the crashes of the waves against the shore. Your hearts beat as one, the sensation pulsating through your held hands. Feeling Ben through the Force was a consciousness that you would never get tired of. It made you feel whole. You often wondered if he felt the same.

 _I do, sweetheart. You’re my everything…_ his voice came into your mind.

You smiled, slight tears pricking behind your eyes.

You searched the island through the Force, desperate to find what was calling you. It was as if you could see it in its entirety, every aspect or creature of the island was laid out before you. You could feel the Force move through and surround you, almost as if it was tying you to Ben. You weren’t sure how long you had sat there when you finally heard it.

There.

In the distance, a faint signal, almost like a chime or ringing noise. It seemed to shimmer in the distance as you searched its origin within the Force. You found it, dancing on the edge of a cliff before tumbling down, down, down…

Your eyes ripped open, head snapping toward the direction of the signal you had so desperately looked for. You panted, taking in your surroundings. Ben sat across from you and the sun had began to set on the island, casting a beautiful cascade of light off the ocean water.

“C’mon,” you said, pulling on your boots, “I found it!”

You got to your feet, dragging Ben up with you, as you turned to jog in the direction of the calling. You ran ahead from Ben, completely encased with whatever awaited you.

“Y/N, wait!” Ben called out from behind you.

You didn’t. You pushed forward. You had to know what this was and why it was so important. You pushed faster until your lower body froze. You turned to face Ben whom had halted your strides with the Force.

“Why’d you do that?!” you complained as he caught up to you.

“I think I’d rather have you in one piece, since you were about to run off the edge of a cliff.”

He was right. The invisible grip on your body disintegrated as you looked down the at least thousand feet of cascading rocks. You stepped back, Ben coming to your side. You peered over, seeing a black hole with some type of vine plant life reaching out from it. It felt like it was pulling you in.

“How are we going to get down there?” you asked, the waves crashing around the stone formation.

“We can climb down, I have equipment on the ship. I think we should head back for the night, though. The sun is setting fairly quickly on this planet.”

Ben took your hand, leading you back to the ship. You paused at the bottom of the ramp. There was something else on this island. A life form with a very faint presence in the Force. Shrugging off the feeling, you continued after Ben whom was gathering food supplies.

“I’m going to start a fire for dinner. You can clean up if you want,” he said, pressing a quick kiss to your cheek before heading outside.

“You can cook?” you asked, following him.

He chuckled, “I can. Is that so shocking to you?”

Your face reddened, “I don’t know, I just figured the Supreme Leader didn’t do much cooking.”

“I normally don’t. I learned a lot of cooking skills from…” he trailed off, brow furrowing as he stacked firewood.

“Your mother,” you finished his sentence. He tensed.

“Yes,” his answer was simple.

You pursed your lips, “I’m gonna take a shower.”

He nodded, his back to you.

Great. Now you’ve upset him. Ugh.

You stripped on the way back to the bedroom and tossed your clothes on the bed, leaving your boots beside the door. The steel of the ship chilled your feet as you stepped into the hot steam of the shower. You thought back to that faint presence you felt as you stood beneath the stream. The island was deserted, who or what could possibly be here? Even being as untrained in the Force as you were, you had never sensed a lifeforce that seemed so purposely diminished.

You sighed, lathering shampoo in your hair, when you felt a larger set of hands replace your own on your scalp. Ben stepped behind you into the shower, his bare body pressing against your own as he massaged your head. You leaned against him, his large frame filling the stall shower completely.

“I’m sorry,” he murmured against your ear, “I didn’t mean to shut you out. It’s just…difficult.”

You turned to face him, lathered shampoo rinsing from your hair and running down your body as you wrapped your arms around his neck.

“Don’t apologize, Ben. I shouldn’t have,” you said, leaning your head on his broad chest.

“No…You make me want to be better, to do better. You make me have a hold on my anger and temper—something I’ve never had. And for that…I’m grateful.”

He cupped your chin, raising your gaze to meet his own before crashing his lips against yours. He kissed you with a need so hot you felt as though you were drowning in it. The water drenched you both as you entangled in one another. Ben lifted you, wrapping your legs around his waist, as he slid his cock into you. You gasped at the intrusion, panting heavily from the desire that was clouding your mind and wetting your cunt. He thrust into you, filling your pussy.

“I need you…More than you will ever know…” he buried his head in the crook of your neck as he continued to fuck you.

You pressed your lips to his, your tongue mixing with his. He seated his cock in you fully and began to exit the shower stall with you, his mouth never separating from your own. A flick of his wrist shut of the water and threw the bathroom door open. He carried you to the bedroom, seating you both in the chair at the foot of the bed where he had watched you play with your cunt. You straddled him, his cock pulsating in your throbbing pussy, sending shockwaves through your lower belly. Ben bit and sucked on your nipples as you rode his dick.

“Ben, fuck…That cock is so good.” You bounced on his dick, your tits bouncing with you as he nuzzled the space between them, his massive hands squeezing your ass forcing you down harder on his cock. You felt your orgasm building, and you knew he could too.

“Cum for me, baby. Cum on my fucking cock.”

Ben bit into the tender flesh of your breast, eliciting a yelp from you and sending you tumbling into your orgasm, causing him to spill inside of you. The two of you stayed joined for a moment, Ben relaxing against the chair and you resting on his chest. He lightly traced the curve of your spine, his heartbeat thumping in your ear. The sound of his breathing was something you could listen to forever.

“We should probably put some clothes on for dinner, sweetheart,” he said, kissing your forehead.

“You’re right.”

The two of you cleaned up and dressed in lounge clothes before heading out to the campfire Ben had built for you. The night air on Ahch-To was chilly, but Ben had brought a blanket big enough for the two of you to wrap around your shoulders. Ben had prepared a type of vegetable and meat stew with a side of bread. It was delicious and you were definitely impressed with his cooking skills. The two of you ate in silence. Once you were finished, you snuggled up to his side, the fire crackling as the two of you watched the waves crash against the shore and the moon glisten off the water. The silence was comforting—just the sounds of you both existing together.

“What do you think is down there?” you asked. You couldn’t help but wonder what was at the bottom of that abyss.

“It’s an air pocket underneath the island. We will have to jump in, but there is a pool beneath to break the fall,” he said, twirling your hair through his hands.

“How’d you know that?”

His hand stilled. When he didn’t respond, you sat up to face him.

“Well?”

He pressed his lips in a thin line, “Do you remember how I told you about my previous master, Snoke? That he formed a bond between Rey and I?”

Your jaw clenched, “Yes.”

“Well,” he sighed, “she found it before and had an odd experience with the Force. We weren’t sure what was down there. Like how I am able to enter your reality through our bond, I was able to that night with her. We touched hands and it was like it transported me here, to this island. Our interaction was interrupted by my Jedi-scum uncle.”

You raised an eyebrow, boring into him. Something didn’t sit right about how he described the scenario. There was more than what he was telling you.

“You care for her,” you said.

“What? No! No, not in that way. No.” He wrapped his arms around you, pulling you back to his chest. “I thought she would want to take the throne with me, to rule with me, as an equal only. Nothing more. But that…Didn’t happen.”

“And what of that bond now?”

“Nothing. Silence.”

“Good,” you said, kissing his lips.

He chuckled, “You aren’t jealous, are you?”

You kissed him again, biting his lip and dragging it through your teeth. Ben moaned in response.

“Not in the least bit.”

You started to kiss him again, but movement out of the corner of your eye caught your attention. You whipped around to the direction, sensing that extremely faint life force again.

“Y/N, what’s wrong?” Ben asked sitting up straight as you got to your feet.

“Someone is here, I can sense it. They went that way,” you gestured around the edge of the cliff to where the beach continued.

Ben and you walked along the edge of the shore, getting closer to whoever was trying to get away around the bend. Rounding the corner, you saw a figure in the distance. They were standing with your back to you, covered in long gray robes. The two of you stopped about fifty feet away when the figure slowly turned to you. A man with long graying hair and a beard stood there. He lifted his arms—one robotic—to remove his hood.

You heard Ben’s saber ignite behind you. His face was contorted in rage, but the other man did not seem to be phased. You backed up to Ben, grabbing his hand and forcing him to look at you. His eyes connected with yours causing his features to soften. He looked back to the man, raising his saber to point at him.

“You…” Ben said through gritted teeth.

“Hey, kid.”


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And we keep on moving with Chapter 13! Thank you all SO MUCH for the kudos and comments! The comments make my fucking day, so by all means... Leave me some more! 
> 
> Also... Do we have any Marriage Story/Charlie Barber fans? I've attached a link to another fic I'm currently working on. Go give it some love! 
> 
> https://archiveofourown.org/works/26383240/chapters/64264288

Rage. Pure, blinding rage, sent shockwaves through your bond. Ben’s grasp on your hand tightened as he moved toward the man, his saber ignited and leading you. He pulled you with him, shielding your body behind him.

“How? HOW?!” he spit at the man, “I felt you disintegrate from the Force!”

Your eyes flicked nervously between Ben and the older man. Even in previous exchanges with Ben’s temper—his Kylo Ren side—you had never felt such turmoil coursing through him. You knew what Ben was capable of…And you didn’t want to witness it first hand.

“I came to this island to die, Ben,” the man said, turning to face you both. He was so close to the end of the lightsaber that the red light illuminated his face. “I failed you. I came here to live with that regret—that despair—and die.”

Ben ground his teeth together, his hand tightening around the hilt of the weapon. Slight tears brimmed his eyes as he breathed heavily. The silence was so thick, almost tangible.

“Ben…” you whispered, hand snaking around his raised arm. His head turned to yours, eyes searching your face. You laced your hand over his and lowered the weapon, deactivating it. You cupped his face and he leaned into your touch, closing his eyes. The man studied your interaction, focusing intently on you.

“Who are you?” he asked you. Him speaking snapped Ben’s attention back to the present, Ben protectively shielding you behind him. You stepped around to face him, holding Ben’s hand.

“My name is Y/N, but I suppose I could ask the same of you,” you replied. You knew some about Ben’s past, but you remembered how he described the island when you first researched it. “I’m assuming you’re Ben’s ‘Jedi-scum uncle’ as he described it.” You didn’t need to look at Ben to see the smirk that was on his face.

“I can see you’ve been told some family history, how quaint...” he replied, you rolled your eyes. “I am Luke Skywalker, Jedi Master. I am Ben’s uncle.”

 _It’s okay,_ you said to Ben through your bond, _he will not harm us._

He eyed you, _But that does not mean that I don’t wish to harm him._

 _There is more to this altercation,_ you said, _he could be of help to us. The Force has brought us to this point for a reason. If you’ve taught me anything, it’s that the Force guides us to where we need to be._

 _It guided me to you,_ he replied. You gave him a small smile. You weren’t exactly one to beat around the bush, so you got right to the fucking point.

“Now that we’re all introduced…What the fuck did you do to Ben?” you asked, stalking toward Luke. He was your height, so you stood toe to toe with him, your eyes burning into his.

“He didn’t tell you,” it was a statement, rather than a question.

“No, he didn’t,” you felt Ben’s uneasiness through your bond, “so speak, Jedi.”

Luke went on to tell you how he felt darkness building in Ben during his Jedi training, how he thought he could stop it by taking his life. He said the moment of pure instinct passed, but Ben saw him draw his weapon on him. Ben reacted by pulling the stone hut in on them both. Luke said that he awoke to his temple and training sites burning and Ben was gone. That Ben had destroyed the temple. Something about the story did not sit right with you. There was more to it.

“No, no. This isn’t right,” you said.

“It’s true,” Ben stepped forward, wrapping a hand around your waist.

“I believe everything he has told me except you burning the temple,” you said, “Ben, do you actually remember starting the fire?”

He studied you for a moment, brow furrowing, as he tried to remember that fateful night. “I…” he stammered, shaking his head, “I…don’t. I woke up and a blast—fire, people screaming…” he trailed off, pacing along the shore.

You met Luke’s gaze, “This is not right. He doesn’t even have recollection of committing the crime you said he did,” you gestured to Ben, “I have access to his mind, I can see and feel what he sees. He did not destroy the temple. He defended himself against _you_ , but he did not destroy that god damn temple.”

Luke was speechless as he backed away from you.

“Then who did it?” Ben asked, returning to your side.

“Snoke,” you said. You knew it to be true. “Think about it, Ben. Snoke manipulated you from day one. He knew you were so close to being turned, yet you needed that extra push. Something that could be pinned on you to make you irredeemable. He used and abused you, you told me that yourself. He created a bond between you and that bitch,” Ben chuckled, “that hasn’t been present since he died. We were not able to fully connect until he was gone or until that hold on your mind was diminished. You didn’t do this, Ben.”

He cupped your face, brushing his thumb over your lower lip. His lip quivered as he spoke, “Thank you, love.” You pressed your lips to his and then Ben turned to Luke.

“However,” Ben said, “there is still the issue of my own uncle trying to kill me in my sleep. You knew there was conflict in me—you sensed my power and you were afraid. Why? Why not be the mentor I needed? Why not guide me instead of trying to end my life?” Ben’s voice rose as he talked and walked toward Luke. He towered over him. Luke breathed unevenly, looking between the two of you.

“There is more to the story, isn’t there?” you asked.

Luke sighed, “It is not my story to tell.” He pushed past you both, walking up the stairs to the stone huts.

“Then whose is it?” you asked, Ben and you following after him.

He turned to look at the two of you, pausing in the threshold of a hut, “Leia’s.” He slammed the door behind him.

You turned to Ben, “Your mother.”

“Yes.”

You wrapped your arms around his torso, pressing your head against his broad chest. His breathing evened as you held him in place.

“Come on, let’s get some rest. We still have a mission to carry out.”

+++++++++++++

You awoke the next morning to sunlight streaming through slits in the window and an empty bed. You sensed Ben nearby.

 _Good morning, beautiful,_ his voice chimed in your head.

 _Good morning, Supreme Leader,_ you replied.

 _We have a big day, so get dressed and come eat breakfast. I’d wear something you would be able to swim in,_ he said.

_Sounds good, I’ll be out in a minute._

_Don’t make me wait too long,_ a beat, _I love you._

_I love you, Ben Solo._

You dressed quickly in a black long sleeve bodysuit with a deep v neck cut and leather leggings. You braided your hair into two French braids and slip on your boots before heading down the ramp of the ship to see Ben plating eggs and some type of meat.

“Here, sweetheart,” Ben said, handing you a plate and kissing your forehead.

“Thanks, babe.” You plopped down next to him, scarfing down your food.

He chuckled, “Are you hungry?”

“Apparently,” you took a drink of water from the canteen, “So, what’s the plan?”

Ben finished his plate before speaking, “We will have to climb down to the landing. From there, we will have to jump down into the opening. There is a pool beneath, like I said before. You can swim, right?”

“Of course I can,” you stretched, the tight fabric of the bodysuit constricting your breasts. Ben, of course noticed, watching intently.

“Be good, Supreme Leader,” you chastised him. He crashed his lips against yours, squeezing your breast.

“Don’t tell me what to do, Doctor,” he muttered against your lips. He kissed the soft stops behind your ear and along your neck before pulling away, taking your plate from your lap. You gave him the most pathetic pout face and he laughed, “Let’s get going. We aren’t even sure what we’re looking for.”

You nodded, gathering some supplies while Ben slung a bag on his back. You held hands as you walked toward the cliff. Passing the stone huts on the hill, you thought back to last night.

“Has he come out of there?” you asked, trying not to fall on the rocky terrain.

“Fortunately, no,” Ben paused, “I am, however, grateful that there is some form of closure between us, even as muddy as it is.”

You nodded, pursing your lips. You wanted to address what other information came to light, but you knew now was not the time.

“Eventually,” he said, dropping the bag to the ground as you graced the edge of the cliff. “Eventually…I will have to talk to her. Now…is just not the time.”

“You know whenever you do, I will be there for you. I’m always on your side, ya know.” You kissed his cheek.

He smirked, “Obviously. You’ve tried to kill just about anybody that has come in our quarters.”

You laughed, “You’re mine and I don’t like to share.”

Ben attached a utility belt around your waist and you secured your blaster to your thigh.

“Now, listen,” he said, “I’m going to go down to that level,” he pointed below you, “and I’ll help you down. It should be easier from there.”

“Okay.”

Ben descended the cliff and helped you down. It was a long way to the bottom and in this moment, you were super fucking thankful heights didn’t bother you. The two of you made your way down to the bottom of the abyss, the water splashing violently around you. You peered over into the hole and saw nothing but black.

“Are you sure about this?” you asked, kinda nervous about jumping into fucking nothing.

“Trust me, sweetheart. I won’t let you get hurt.”

He grabbed what looked like a glow stick from his bag and activated it, tossing it into the hole. It fell for awhile before you heard a small splash and saw a small, yellow light at the bottom of the cavern.

“I’ll go first and then I’ll call for you, okay?” he asked, squeezing your hand.

You nodded and Ben stepped into the abyss. The sound of a splash and his voice saying “Alright, come on!” sent some relief through you as you stepped off the ledge. The fall was quick but fucking terrifying before you hit the water, Ben grabbing you instantly and helping you to the shore beneath the island.

He ignited his saber, illuminating the cave in pulsating red light. There was only one way to walk, so you followed it. You walked for what felt like forever until you reached a wall that looked like a mirror. You saw both of your reflections, but it was like they went on forever.

“What is this place?” you asked Ben.

“I am not sure…But this fits the description of what Rey said she saw down here. She said there was nothing else.”

Small whisperings caught your attention. Something was drawing you to this mirrored glass. There was more to what was being seen.

“There’s something else…” you said, stepping closer to the wall. “Ben, I don’t think she was able to see what is down here because… Well, it’s meant for us.”

He deactivated the saber, standing beside you.

You laced your fingers through his, “I think we should touch it.”

“Touch it?”

“Yes, touch it, and center through the Force. Something is calling—pulling us. Don’t you feel it?” He concentrated for a moment, forehead creasing.

“You’re right,” he replied.

You both placed your hands on the mirrored wall, closing your eyes and breathing deeply. You felt the Force surround you and the wall dissipated beneath your fingers. You opened your eyes and couldn’t believe what you saw.

“Ben…look…”

He did. The glass panel had disintegrated, shards of it floating away as an entrance to the room behind it. You stepped across the threshold and Ben followed, the mirror reforming behind you.

Texts and scrolls covered in dust lined the walls of the hidden room. In the middle, a small table sat with a scroll displayed on top. It looked as if it hadn’t been touched in hundreds of years.

“That’s it,” you said, pointing to the scroll on the table. It felt as though it was singing to you. “That’s what we need.”

Ben was still looking around the room, completely awe-struck, “The hidden Jedi archives…” His fingers danced across the spines of the books, “These are things I am not sure even Luke would be aware of. History and training manuals set down by the first Force users.” He pulled a couple texts from the shelf, flipping through the pages. He looked so…Excited? No, passionate.

“All this time…” a beat, “I thought I would reach my highest potential by dominating and conquering throughout the galaxy. But you…You are my highest potential. Without you—without whatever this is—I’m just a Supreme Leader. You…you make me so much more. _We_ are so much more together.” He cupped your face with his massive hands, tucking a strand of loose, wet hair behind your ear.

He pressed his full lips to yours, completely drinking you in. His breath was hot against yours as you clawed against him. You needed him—right now.

“Take off your clothes,” you breathed against his lips. You pulled his shirt up and over his head. His bare chest rippled beneath your touch.

He pulled his lips away from yours, “What—here?” he asked, you pulled his mouth back to yours.

“Here.”

You dropped to your knees in front of him, practically ripping his pants open. His cock sprung free, you immediately taking him in your mouth. Ben moaned, bracing an arm against the wall, the other coming to your head, forcing it deeper down your throat. Saliva spilled from the corners of your mouth as he fucked your throat. You pulled your top down, removing your arms from your sleeves and freeing your tits.

“Get the fuck up,” he spit at you, grabbing your shoulders and hoisting you up to collide his lips with yours. His tongue swirled around your own, his teeth biting your lower lip. The faint taste of iron filled your mouth as he spun you around, pressing you against the stone wall of the cave.

“I fucking love you,” he said in your ear, biting along your neck while he grasped your breasts from behind. You shimmied out of your leggings, his cock pressing against your ass as you undid the snaps of the bodysuit between your legs. Your head lulled to the side as he sucked against your collar bone, biting hard enough to break skin, before slamming his cock into your already drenched cunt.

His hips snapped wildly against you, his dick pounding into that sensitive spot inside your pussy. You screamed in pleasure as he fucked you relentlessly, wetness coating your inner thighs with each thrust of his cock.

“Fuck me, Ben…Fuck…” you whimpered, his hand tight around your neck. The soft flesh of your breasts dug into the rough texture of the rock of the wall, leaving scratches along your tanned skin. Ben flipped you around, lifting you and wrapping your legs around his waist, sliding his cock back inside your walls.

You threaded your hands through his damp hair, bringing his mouth to yours. Your teeth chattered against one another’s as he thrust into you. Ecstasy flooded your bond as you panted together, chests heaving on each other’s as he made love to you.

“B-Ben…” you stammered. Your legs quivered around him. He ground his fingers farther into the flesh of your ass.

“I love you, baby…” he kissed your neck, tears pricking your eyes from the amount of bliss you were experiencing.

“Fuck—I love you, Ben…I’m gonna cum!”

You tumbled into your orgasm, waves crashing around you. Ben’s followed, pumping you full of his seed. You held onto him as if to never let go.

“Please…” he tried to catch his breath, “never let me go.”

You held the sides of his face, placing a kiss on the tip of his nose, “Never. You’re stuck with me for life, Supreme Leader.”

He smirked, “I like the sound of that.”

The two of you helped one another dress, Ben placed a tender kiss on your forehead. You diverted you’re attention back to the scroll in the middle of the room.

“This is what we came for,” you said, lifting it from the pedestal and handing it to Ben.

His large hands engulfed the tattered parchment and he delicately unrolled the document.

“How strange,” he said, “it’s written in Sith.”

“Sith? Why would that be in a Jedi archive?”

He studied the text, “I am not sure. Some of this is very old language I will have to decipher.”

You moved around him to look at the texts. It was full of strange markings you had never seen before except while flipping through some of Ben’s books in your quarters. There was something, however, that was oddly familiar.

“Look,” you pointed to two drawings to the side of the texts, “those look like those crystals you showed me in our chambers.”

“The Qixoni and Solari crystals… You’re right. We will have to get back to the Finalizer so I can translate this. There is more to this than I originally thought.”

You made your way back out of the cavern, exiting onto the beach below the island. Climbing your way to the top, you saw Luke standing in the distance, observing the both of you.

“You were able to access the archives…” he said, Ben helped you up the last leg of the cliff.

Ben tucked the scroll in his bag, “Yes. What has been calling Y/N will need translation from Sith.”

“How?” Luke asked, “How were you able to access it? The archives have not been accessible for hundreds of years.”

“What do you mean? You mean to tell me your old ass has been here for how many years and you never went down there?” Ben chuckled.

Luke came closer, “That archive has not been accessible since the times of Revan and Bastila and yet, it calls to _you._ ”

Ben scoffed, “Well, that does make some sense, given the two were a bonded pair.”

“Bonded—like us?” you asked Ben, “So, they were lovers…Soulmates?” You looked to Luke.

“Yes,” Luke said, “they sacrificed themselves—physically and spiritually through the Force—to save one another.” Luke turned, hands behind his back as he walked back toward the huts.

“Ben, what does this mean?”

“I am not sure,” he replied, “but given the experiences you are facing and what Hux had said about an outside force brewing in the Unknown Regions… Something is coming.”


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which we find out how some of the Knights feel and Space Prince goes down on you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Helllloooo! Welcome to Chapter 14. This one is a short, transitional chapter to get us to our next adventure. Hope you enjoy!

It had been about a week since you and Ben had returned to the Finalizer. After the encounter with Luke, the two of you left him. He never came out of his hut again.

Ben was working tirelessly to attempt to translate the scroll. He knew that it had something to do with the crystals, but the texts were written in Sith. Not only were they written in Sith, they were written in a variable code. You had hoped that by having the archive, you’d have another vision and magically figure it out—that definitely wasn’t the case.

Given the pending danger that would more than likely head your way, Ben thought it would be best if you took up training with the Knights, specifically Ap’lek. You worked with different blasters, taking them apart, cleaning them, and putting them back together. Eventually he showed you other physical contact weapons that you basically beat the shit out of a training droid with.

“Why do I have to learn to use all of these things?” you huffed, ramming into another training droid with a spear. The Knights trained around you, unmasked, while Ap’lek supervised you.

“It is best that you are familiar with all forms of weaponry, Miss Ren. Especially being the Supreme Leader’s partner—it puts a target on your back as well,” he replied, taking the spear from you and returning it to the wall rack.

You wiped sweat from your forehead, “Yeah, you got that right. I’ve already had someone try to poison me.”

“It was a peculiar incident,” he said, “and definitely not work of the Resistance. Which is partially the reason Master Ren is concerned.”

“And the rest of his reasoning for being concerned?”

Ushar approached the two of you from behind, “He loves you. That’s literally the only other reason.”

You flushed, “Well, I do understand that.”

“And you love him?” Cardo asked, moving to stand beside Ushar. You had hardly spoken to the rest of the Knights.

“She killed Vicrul for him, she must love him,” Kuruk spit at you.

“Kuruk—don’t,” Trudgen warned.

“No—I’m finished being silent. She killed our brother only to parade around as Ren’s whore,” he towered over you, eyes slicing you like daggers.

“That’s enough,” Ap’lek thundered. The Knights backed away, leaving you toe to toe with Kuruk. Rage engulfed your every fiber and you stared back at him.

“I had no intention of killing him,” you said through gritted teeth.

“And yet he is fucking dead. And not only is he dead, you knew how he felt about you. You don’t deserve to be by Ren’s side—I’d much rather see that scavenger as his whore.”

Red. All you saw was red.

You threw out your hand, beckoning Ap’lek’s ax to your side. Kuruk bared his teeth, ripping a double-ended spear from the training room wall. The vibro-ax pulsated under your grip as you charged at him, blinding anger rippling through your muscles as you relentlessly attacked him. He hit back, sweat and spit flinging from his form as he administered blow after blow against your weapon. Shouting in the background faded to dissonance as the two of you tore into each other.

The hilt of the ax cracked against Kuruk’s jaw, immediately dislocating it and sending blood pouring from his mouth. He continued his onslaught, but faltered, you ridding him of the spear. It clattered against the back wall of the room. You decided to make the fight fair, tossing the ax to the side. The two of you circled each other before he tackled you, slamming your back against the steel of the floor. You yelped as your head hit the hard surface, but you didn’t give in.

Centering yourself in the Force, you launched him across the room, crashing him into a shelf of weights. He charged you again, before you reached out, grasping his throat through an invisible grip and lifting him into the air. Your teeth chattered with adrenaline as you watched blood spew from his mouth as he clawed at his throat, gagging for air.

“I…” you heaved, “am his equal. I know the future he wants for us. And you—you will do well to watch your fucking mouth.” Abruptly, he dropped from the air, rolling into a pile on the ground. Kuruk breathed deep trying to catch his breath.

“What is happening?!” Ben bellowed behind you, the doors to the training room flying open. He crossed the room in long strides, his cape billowing behind him.

“Master Ren,” the Knights addressed him, going to one knee. Kuruk struggled but managed to rise to one knee as well.

Ben took in the site laid before him before turning to Ap’lek, “What happened?”

Ap’lek stood, “Master, Kuruk and Miss Ren had an altercation.”

“I can see that, Ap’lek.”

“Yes, Master. Kuruk holds a grudge for Vicrul’s death and berated Miss Ren. She retaliated.”

“Yeah, and beat the shit out of me,” Kuruk muttered, standing. You eyed the mess you had made of him. You definitely did some damage.

Ben furrowed his brow, “Leave us.”

The Knights gathered their helmets and weapons and filed out of the room. Ben paced ahead of you, walking into his private training quarters. You must’ve fucked up big time. Shit.

You followed him through the door, closing it behind you. He stood in the bay window, looking out into the stars.

You swallowed, “Am I in trouble?” you asked coming to stand beside him. You watched at TIE Fighters flew by and a set of planets passed in the distance.

He smirked, running a gloved hand through his hair, “No, sweetheart, you’re not in trouble.” He wrapped an arm around your waist and pulled you to his side, pressing a kiss to your forehead.

“What’s wrong, Ben?”

He sighed, “I felt so much anger through our bond—rage. The Dark Side of the Force is fueled by that anger and yet you don’t falter to that side. You remain balanced completely.”

You remained silent, unsure of where he was going with this.

“How?” he continued, “How are you able to remain neutral?”

You pressed your mouth into a line, “Ben, I don’t really know. I remember reading the mantras for both the Dark Side and the Light and I thought they were both a little extreme. I guess I just choose to not be one or the other,” you shrugged.

He eyed you, but you continued, “It’s kinda like politics. I never aligned with a single party because I agreed with aspects of both. I agree with things that both sides of the Force say. You can believe both sides—the world isn’t always black and white.”

“Sometimes it’s gray…” Ben trailed off.

You nodded, “Exactly.”

He looked back out into the stars, deep in thought.

“What’s wrong?” you asked, moving to face him and cupping his jaw. He leaned into your touch.

“Nothing, there are just some things I need to meditate on later,” he paused, “but for now, you should look at our home for the next little while.” He gestured out the window.

A large planet appeared before you. Its surface was dark but golden light illuminated across its expanse and ships traveled around it. A host of ships like the Finalizer were stationed nearby.

“It’s beautiful…”

“Welcome to Coruscant. Our government is stationed here, which is where we will be living full time once the war is over. We are returning now because the palace is hosting a gala for the new ranking officers. That, and I had hoped to present you to the council.” He held your waist as he led you out of the training quarters and down the hall.

“Present me?” you asked. “Present me as what?”

He pursed his lips as the two of you made your way back to your chambers. He seemed to be mulling over his words. You entered the room and he closed the door behind you. You had never really given your relationship a title. Sure, you fucked all the time, had said “I love you,” and had talked about your future, but you had never really thought about what he considered you to be.

You flopped down on the couch, pulling him on top of you. You brushed his hair back from his eyes and kissed his nose and his massive frame engulfed yours.

“Are you going to tell the council that I’m your girlfriend?” you giggled.

He chuckled, “That’s such a juvenile term, love. I don’t think I’d refer to you as that.”

He peppered kisses around your mouth and down your neck, nuzzling behind your ear.

“What would you call me then?”

He paused against your neck and you felt his full lips stretch into a smile against your skin.

“My love,” he spoke against your neck, trailing his lips lower toward your collarbone, “my life. My everything.” He dipped lower, kissing and licking at the base of your neck. You moaned as you felt heat pool between your thighs.

“My Empress…” his gloved hand squeezed your breast as you grasped at his cape, “my companion… The one I want to rule with. The one I want to live out the rest of my days with.”

His hand dipped below the hem of your leggings. He nipped at your breasts under the fabric of your shirt as his fingers drew circles against your clit. He withdrew his hand, admiring your juices slick against the leather of his fingers before he licked it clean.

“Fuck,” you moaned as you watched him lap up the wetness.

“You’re such a good girl—always wet for me.”

He went to the floor in front of you, pulling you into a sitting position. He practically ripped your leggings and underwear off, tossing them to the side of the living area. You relaxed your head against the back of the couch as he kissed down your thighs.

“Your skin is so fucking soft and this little cunt smells so good. You’re fucking intoxicating.” You squealed and grabbed at his hair and he bit into your thigh, teasing your entrance with his still-gloved fingers.

“Eyes on me,” he ordered.

Your eyes snapped to his. His eyes burned into yours as he dove between your legs, lapping his tongue against your aching clit. You moaned and squirmed under his relentless attack on your pussy before his arms locked around your thighs, holding you in place. Your eyes had just rolled to the back of your head in pleasure when he bit against your clit.

“I said, eyes on me,” he mumbled against your folds.

“Yes, sir,” you muttered, legs trembling from the stimulation.

He continued to suck at your cunt, his tongue pushing in and out of your pussy. He dropped further, hoisting your legs over his shoulders as he licked circles around the rim of your ass, massaging your clit with his thumb. He fucked your asshole with his tongue, causing your legs to lock around his head.

“B-Ben…fuck, that feels so fucking good.” You threaded your fingers through his raven locks, pushing his face down farther. He switched from your aching cunt to your ass, absolutely devouring you. He moved back to your clit, sucking and licking the sensitive bud as he pushed this thumb into your ass, slowly moving it in and out.

“One day, sweetheart, I’m going to fuck this little ass of yours,” he spit against your pussy lips before licking up the saliva, “I’m going to fuck this ass and fill it full of fucking cum.”

“Yes, yes, p-please,” you panted as he moved his fingers faster. Before you could even realize what was happening, you tumbled into your orgasm, clenching around his fingers. Ben sucked your juice from your pussy and you came down from your high.

“That was…” you breathed, slumping into the couch. Ben sat beside you, pulling you to his chest. “That was so good—fuck.”

You laid against him, completely exhausted from your orgasm. His breathing was even beneath you as you relaxed, shutting your eyes. You though back to your conversation before he ate your pussy until you came in his mouth. You smiled to yourself as you thought about his words and how he earnestly meant them.

 _Wait,_ you thought, _he wants to spend the rest of his life with me? That would mean…_ your thoughts trailed off.

“Yes,” he answered your thoughts, “that’s precisely what I mean. When the time is right, of course.”

You sat up, eyeing him. “You really love me, don’t you?”

He cupped your jaw, “More than you’ll ever know.”

He pressed his lips to yours, sending electricity down your spine. He pulled away and you snickered.

“What?”

“You taste like pussy,” you chuckled.

His eyes darkened, “It will taste even better when you’re sucking it off my cock later.”

You flushed, biting your lip, “Yes, sir.”

He smirked, “Good girl—but we don’t have time right now, unfortunately.”

“Why’s that?” you asked.

“We have to pack.”


	15. Chapter 15

Coruscant was immaculate. From the buildings to the vehicles to the creatures and individuals that resided there—you had never seen anything so impressive. You practically gawked out the window of the ship as you, Ben, and the Knights approached the palace. Given the altercation you had had previously with the Knights, they didn’t really speak on the way down. Not even Ap’lek.

Kuruk piloted the ship to a private landing pad towards the top of the palace. Ben walked ahead of you with the Knights, stopping briefly to speak with Ap’lek and Ushar. You looked out over the balcony completely entranced by this new life—your new normal. Your mind drifted to Coop and how he would’ve killed to experience this.

 _Are you okay, sweetheart?_ Ben’s voice drifted into your mind as he consulted with the Knights.

 _Yeah,_ you replied, _just missing Coop…The older scientist I used to work with. He was like a dad to me. He would’ve loved it here._

You felt love and comfort flood your bond, almost immediately alleviating the sadness you were feeling. You joined Ben at his side as he spoke to Ap’lek.

“You and Ushar will guard our chambers. I have meetings to attend to, unfortunately, so Y/N will be left in your care.” The two masked men nodded, exiting through your quarters and into the hall with the rest of the Knights.

Ben led you into your new home. If you thought your quarters on the Finalizer were crazy nice, this was an entire new level of luxury you definitely weren’t used to. While the décor was luxurious and the rooms were large and spacious, the one thing that you couldn’t get over was the openness of the entire apartment. Large columns stood with white draping that reached from the floor to the ceiling. The heavy fabric slightly swayed with the breeze. There were no walls to the outside, which technically didn’t matter given how high up you were. You couldn’t help but wonder about the weather.

Ben chuckled, “The weather is consistent on Coruscant, typically the same as it is now every day. However, if we were to need separation from outside,” he tapped a code into a control pad on the wall, “we will have it.” A forcefield appeared around the wall-less area, immediately stopping the breeze. Ben waved his hand and the forcefield dissipated.

You wrapped your arm through his as he continued to give you a tour of your living area The living room and kitchen were much larger and contained an actual dining room. A spare room sat off to the side next to the room where that mangled helmet was housed. You still never got around to asking him about it like the man in your dream had said. Ben informed you that he had set up a workspace in that room as well with the crystals and the scroll from the Jedi archives. From what he had said, it was going nowhere fast.

The bedroom was gorgeous and each of you had a closet with ridiculous amounts of clothing. Of course, Ben’s was all the same shades of black and gray, but yours contained even more gowns, jewels, and shoes than the one on the Finalizer. The droids had moved your other clothing into this closet and they had placed your white lab coat at the forefront for viewing.

“Holy shit,” you said when you entered the bathroom. The tub was literally big enough to swim in. It had fountains on each side and seating towards the front.

“It was just a shower,” Ben replied, “but I knew you liked baths, so I had them remodel the bathroom.”

You smiled, wrapping your arms around his neck. You pushed up on your tip toes to press a kiss to his full lips, “You’re the best, you know that?”

He smirked, “Now I do.”

Ben left your quarters for a series of meetings with different generals and commanders that he listed off, but you only recognized Hux’s name. He said you were free to wander the grounds and palace as long as you had the Knights to escort. You wondered if people within the palace knew of you—well, Miss Ren anyway. If any of them knew about their Supreme Leader’s love interest.

Given your new status as Miss Ren and practically the Supreme Leader’s Empress, you dug through the impeccable closet Ben had set up for you. Mixed in with the series of gowns, you found a black jumpsuit, which would be perfect for exploring the castle. It was solid black, and the bust was garnished with gold beading while the sleeves tousled into a cape. You paired it with black pumps. You admired your reflection in the mirror when part of the closet opened as you edged toward it, revealing multiple rows of gems and jewelry. At the top was an assortment of crowns.

A simple, gold crown caught your eye that was perfect for your outfit. It was an infinity style that had golden leaves and branches extending out from its base all the way around. You fashioned your hair around the crown in a low bun and threw on some makeup before meeting the Knights at the door.

“Miss Ren,” Ap’lek and Ushar said in unison, giving you a slight bow.

“You know you don’t have to be so formal with me,” you said, looping your arm through Ap’lek’s as the two men escorted you down the hallway. Ushar stayed slightly behind you and Ap’lek led you towards a turbolift.

“I always want to address you with the upmost respect, Miss Ren. You are our future Empress, after all,” Ap’lek replied. The three of you squeezed into the lift, the Knights pushing their weapons towards the back wall. It had to be a comical sight—the three of you shoved in the lift. Two massive masked men behind you.

“You can respect me and still be my friend, Ap’lek,” you said. “You too, Ushar.” Ushar didn’t respond, only nodded.

“You would consider us your friends?” Ap’lek asked.

You shrugged, watching lights fly by as the lift descended, “I mean, yeah, I would.”

The lift came to a halt and the three of you stepped out into a large circular room that had hallways branching off in different directions. Stormtroopers and others in uniform bustled about, not seeming to pay too much attention to your group.

“I thought we could start on this level, Miss Ren,” Ap’lek said. “This level contains the throne room, the council—where the Supreme Leader is now—and the archives. There is also the ballroom where the gala will be hosted later this week.”

You came to stop in front of large double doors. You waved your hand and they opened on command, allowing the three of you entrance. The ballroom was extravagant already. A large chandelier hung from the center of the ceiling and the farthest wall from you was opened like your quarters with a balcony extending out over the city. Large red and black banners hung from the ceiling, displaying the First Order’s symbol. Tables and chairs had already been set up for the event as well as an open space for what you assumed to be a dance floor. Towards one side of the room, a table set up was made for two people, both chairs looking like thrones. The arrangement set a few feet higher than the rest of the tables and you assumed that is where you and Ben would be seated for the evening.

The three of you exited and moved to the next room.

“This is where the council meets,” Ap’lek said as you stopped in front of the door. “Master Ren is meeting with them as we speak. It is made up of varying generals and commanders.” You could sense Ben nearby, he seemed frustrated and somewhat worried.

“What were they meeting about?” you asked, resting your arm in Ap’lek’s as he led you away from the door. Your concern for the situation was growing as you felt Ben’s frustration turn into anger.

A muffled sigh came from behind his mask, “Nothing you need to worry about at the moment, Miss Ren.” How strange. Ap’lek typically was upfront about any issue, what could he be keeping from you?

You walked for what felt like hours down a long corridor to another set of double doors.

“The throne room,” Ap’lek said, pushing the doors open for you. You stepped inside, taking in your surroundings.

The palace throne room was much like the throne room on the Finalizer except the large windows overlooked the city instead of the stars. The other difference was the two thrones sat in front of you instead of just one.

“Two thrones,” Ushar finally spoke through his distorted mask, “for the Supreme Leader and his Empress.”

“This is just all so surreal…” you whispered, eyes connecting with the thrones.

“Once the war is over, the First Order will reign. The galaxy will be at your fingertips, Miss Ren,” Ushar continued.

“Come, Ushar. Don’t overwhelm her,” Ap’lek scolded.

He was right—you were overwhelmed. The thought of ruling at Ben’s side was completely fine but seeing it firsthand? That was a different story. Obviously, the Force and universe had brought you together. You’re bonded, each part of the other’s soul.

“No, no, he’s right.” Ap’lek turned to face you, “Once the war is over, I will become his Empress. I just can’t help but feel as though I’m missing out. Like I am totally sheltered from the war and the issues at hand. How can I help govern people if I don’t even know what is going on out there?” you gestured out the window.

Ap’lek’s mask studied you, “So, are you saying you would like to be more involved with the war? In our move to defeat the Resistance?”

“I don’t know!” you complained, flailing your arms. “I mean, yes. Yes, I want to help in any way possible. I just need to know what is happening. To know what issues Kylo is facing with that council. I want to see for myself what needs to be done.”

Ushar spoke up, “She could accompany us to Mustafar.”

“Absolutely not,” Ap’lek countered, “Master Ren would never allow it.”

“Hello, I’m right here,” you scoffed, “ _this_ is what I’m talking about. You all want to shelter me like I’m breakable. I can obviously defend myself.” Your mind briefly drifted to think of Vicrul. Sadness overcame you before you shook off the feeling. You didn’t want to alarm Ben.

“Mustafar is dangerous, completely crawling with Darth Vader cultists and worshippers. Master Ren will not put your safety at risk,” Ap’lek replied. Who is Darth Vader? Maybe you could find out later.

“That’s true,” Ushar argued, “but the mission is decently simple. There isn’t a lot going into the planning other than show up, wipe them out, take what we need. She can use a blaster, we’ve seen that plenty times. She is strong in the Force. I think it would be a good starting place for her if she wants to be involved with the cause.”

“Thank you,” you exclaimed, hands going to your hips.

Ap’lek let out an exasperated sigh, “Very well—but _you,_ ” he gestured to you with his axe, “will have to take that up with Master Ren. I can assure you that he will not take lightly to the idea.”

“Fine,” you replied, “when is the mission?”

“We were due to leave after the gala,” Ap’lek said.

“Wait, so Ben was just going to leave me here? He hasn’t said anything to me about it… fucking Space Prince…” you muttered.

Ushar howled with laughter, “What did you just call him? Space Prince? That’s too much.”

Your face burned, “Shut up, it’s just some stupid nickname I gave him before I was sent, teleported, whatever the fuck, here.”

You made your way to your last stop on this level of the palace—the archives. Rows of texts lined from floor to ceiling and different droids wandered about dusting and shelving books.

“The archives contain anything from recreational reading material to the history of the galaxy,” Ap’lek said, leading you down a row of texts. “If you would like to retrieve a book, you can scroll through the data pad here, select it, and a service droid will retrieve it for you. Some of them are pretty high up on the shelves, as you can see.” He pointed to the data pad on the wall that lit up as you passed by.

“Back here is the restricted section,” he continued. You reached an area of the archives that was shut behind locked doors.

“Why is it restricted?”

“Some of it is for the Supreme Leader’s or other higher officials’ use only. Given your status, I would assume at some point you would have access to it. There is a keypad on the wall in which you would have to enter a code if you are granted access,” Ap’lek explained.

You nodded. You wondered what you be behind those doors and if any of it could be valuable in your translation of the scroll or figuring out who keeps contacting you in your dream. You all made your way to the front of the archives when you stopped, turning back towards the shelves.

“I’d like to spend some time in here, if you don’t mind,” you asked the Knights.

“Of course, Miss Ren,” Ap’lek answered, “we will be outside guarding the doors should you need our assistance. Any of the service droids can help you locate a text.”

The masked men gave you a slight bow before exiting the archives, the doors shutting softly behind them. You sighed, looking around the expansive room as service droids roamed the bookcases. You weren’t exactly sure what you were looking for, but you knew you needed to be here.

You kicked off your shoes and sat cross-legged in the middle of the room, closing your eyes and allowing the Force to flood your senses. Taking deep breaths in and out, you cleared your mind, imagining the vast, dark expanse of space. You felt the Force move around you, shaping itself to your still form. You could sense it move around every living thing near by—the Knights just outside the door, Ben farther down the hall, and…

A presence. Behind you, through the shut doors of the restricted section. It felt familiar, almost like a memory. You stilled your thoughts as you felt the Force shift around you, causing you to open your eyes, whipping around to the closed doors.

Except they weren’t closed anymore—they were open.

You stood slowly, noticing you didn’t see any of the droids bustling about and the room almost looked as if it had a blur to it. Your bare feet chilled against the tile as you wove through the room, coming to stand in front of the opened space. You paused before entering the dark room, however, something—someone—was pulling you in.

Calming your mind, you entered, allowing the Force to guide you to what it wanted you to see. While the archives were full of updated technology and data pads, the restricted section was a typical, aging library. Dust and cobwebs donned the tops of books and scrolls, reminding you of the Jedi archives on Ahch-To.

You rounded a bookcase to see a gray-blue glowing figure standing over a table, multiple texts laid out in front of him. Of course—the man from your dreams.

“What are you doing here?” you asked, approaching him from behind.

“What a warm welcome,” he turned to you, smirking. He reminded you so much of Ben with that expression.

You eyed the texts strewn across the table, “What are these?”

“Answers,” he replied, waving his hand above the tops of the books, causing them to open and pages to turn.

“Why are you here? Why do you look like this?”

He chuckled, “I’m what you would call a Force Ghost. I needed to connect with you in this dimension instead of just your dreams. You needed to see what I’ve pulled for you.” The texts looked a lot like the scroll you retrieved from the Jedi archives. They had the same markings, drawings, and looked to be the same language.

“These texts will assist you in translating the scroll,” he continued, “More than that, they will teach you how to utilize the crystals.”

His mention of the crystals caught your attention.

“When tempered together, the crystals can create powerful weaponry of many forms, it just depends on the user. You need them to face the darkness.”

You rolled your eyes, “Here we go with this ‘darkness’ again! Why can’t you and that Luke guy just tell us what the fuck is happening?”

He sighed, “It is all in due time. Decisions and compromises have to be made on Ben’s part _without_ intrusion from us. He must make his own choices to determine his future, but you can help save him.” He walked you to a nearby sitting area before continuing, “Ben is turning, or in the process of it. He has witnessed how you are able to utilize both sides of the Force and not faulter to one or the other. He needs a push and that,” he gestured toward the table, “is going to help it, along with a conversation he needs to have with his mother.”

You furrowed your brow, remembering the altercation with Luke, “What is she hiding?”

“It is something she must willingly reveal to him. It will change the course of his life. I can say no more on the subject,” he quickly rose, returning to the table. You turned in your seat to face him.

“Take these texts from the archives—they will aid you in your journey. However, it is imperative that you do not speak of how you retrieved them. If anything, tell him the Force led you here.”

And he vanished.

You blinked a couple times as the room settled back to normal. You were sitting in the same position in the middle of the archives, but this time, the texts that were laid on the table were stationed in front of you on the floor, in the same order the man had had them.

You stationed the four, extremely heavy texts on a rolling cart and slipped your shoes back on. You pushed the cart towards the door, waving your hand as it opened on command. The Knights stepped to the side to allow you to exit and you heard Ap’lek chuckle.

“Some light reading, Miss Ren?” he asked, positioning his axe on his back and taking the cart from you.

You laughed, “I guess you could say that, Ap’lek.”

“Where to now?”

“Our chambers,” you replied, “I need to prepare myself for the argument about me accompanying you to Mustafar.”

+++++++++++++

“Absolutely not,” Ben replied sternly, clearing your dinner plates from the table.

“Why not?” you countered, following him into the kitchenette as he laid the dishes on the tray for the service droid. “Ushar said this is a fairly simple mission and it would be great as a starting point for me!”

“Mustafar is dangerous and I refuse to put you in a position that any harm could come to you. You are too important.”

“Ben, come on! I love you and I know you love me and don’t want to see me hurt but let me help.” He sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose as you continued rambling, “I can use a blaster, I’ve been practicing hand-to-hand combat—I have the Force for fuck’s sake!”

“Your experience with actually using the Force in true battle is little to none.” He moved around you, dimming the lights as he headed to your bedroom to prepare for sleep. You followed after him, almost stepping on his heels.

“You want me to be your Empress. In order to be the best version of myself for that role, I _need_ to be more involved. Don’t you see that?” you asked. Ben continued to lay sleep clothes on the bed for the both of you before turning to the bathroom.

“While I do agree with you on that,” a pause as you heard bath water start to run from the fountains on the bath, “a battle—one that is bound to be slaughter, at that—is not the ideal starting place.”

You entered the bathroom to an almost naked Ben, causing your heart—and cunt—to clench. Even though he was hot as fuck right now, you couldn’t give him this advantage. You shook off the feeling before continuing, “Were you even going to tell me you were leaving?”

Ben sighed, “Yes, of course,” he said, wading into the steaming water, “that was just not on my list of things to talk to you about today. Especially since we just made it to Coruscant.”

“And what of your meeting today?” you asked, finishing slipping your clothes off before joining him in the water. As you submerged your hair, you couldn’t help but be amused at the domesticity of the situation.

“The meeting today was mostly about the mission,” Ben replied, massaging the tops of your shoulders. You leaned back into his chest, lulling your head to the side.

“And the rest of it?”

You could feel the uncertainty through your bond as he spoke, “We’ve received intelligence about a growing militia-type force in the Unknown Regions. Not ours and not of the Resistance.”

You nodded, “And you believe this is the same darkness my dreams have warned us about?”

“Yes,” a beat as Ben lathered soap in your hair, “we have no confirmation, but we believe it is coming from the planet Exegol. The only issue is that in order to find Exegol, you need a Sith wayfinder.”

“What is that?” you asked, dunking your head to rinse the suds. You lathered soap in your hands as Ben lowered himself onto one of the bath benches so you could reach his hair.

“It’s basically a map,” he explained, “Exegol was practically the birthplace of the Sith and has been all but abandoned since their time.”

“And when was that?” Ben rinsed his hair and pulled you to sit in his lap.

You noticed his jaw slightly clench before he spoke, “It has been awhile. There hasn’t been a true Sith since the times of Palpatine and Darth Vader.”

Darth Vader. You knew that name. The Knights had mentioned him previously.

“Who is Darth Vader?”

He smirked, “Of course Vader would peak your interest—he is my grandfather, after all.”

“The Knights said that Mustafar is crawling with Darth Vader cultists,” you stated, eyeing Ben.

He pulled his full lips into a line, “Yes, they are Sith worshippers. Completely barbaric.”

“Hmm,” you hummed, “did you ever meet your grandfather?”

“Unfortunately, no,” he replied, “the only remaining belongings I have from him are his lightsaber and his helmet. Well, then, I guess you could count my Uncle Luke and mother as well, but I honestly don’t,” he laughed.

You smiled as you—

Wait.

He said helmet.

“Helmet? The one on the pedestal?” you questioned.

“Yes,” he eyed you curiously, “sometimes if I am unsure of a path or a decision, I attempt to meditate near it, hoping to reach out to him. I, unfortunately, have not been very successful.”

Your eyes grew wide as you put all of the information together. You thought back to the man in your dreams. He had told you to ask Ben about the helmet and you shall know his identity. So, all this time, Ben’s _grandfather_ was reaching out to you? How could he reach out to you but not Ben? Why couldn’t you tell Ben?

“Is something wrong?” Ben asked, eyes searching yours and snapping you from your thoughts.

“Uhm, no, just tired,” you faked a yawn.

He studied you, “Okay, love. Well, let’s get you to bed.”

Ben fell asleep before you did, strung across your body. You lazily ran your fingers through his hair as you processed all the information you had uncovered today. As you looked as his peaceful, sleeping face that seemed to slightly smile with every stroke of your hand against his scalp, you knew something for certain—there was more to this story and you were taking your ass to Mustafar, with or without his permission.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed! As always, I make up stuff about Star Wars and science so don't come for me about that.


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